What's the Merovingian saying in Matrix Reloaded?

In The Matrix Reloaded, there’s the scene in the restaurant where the Merovingian is saying how much he likes the French language, “especially to curse with.” He then says something in French, and concludes, “It’s like wiping your ass with silk. I love it.”

So French-speaking Dopers, what’s he saying when he’s speaking French? I’d also like to know what he says in French later to Persephone when he catches her helping Neo et al.


I dunno, but I CAN attest that wiping your ass with silk isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

From http://www.henryfarrell.net/movabletype/archives/000101.html:

See if you want a native speaker to take a crack at it. There are several explanations at the location given above. It is also remarked that cursing doesn’t always translate nicely (especially since invective tends to be laced with all manner of idioms, which by definition are not taken literally). I’ll avoid providing a translation as it certainly isn’t fit for family viewing.


P.S. (Google Search: Merovingian french curses; 2nd hit)

Remove the colon to fix the link or click above for the fixed link.

Changed my mind – here’s a rough translation as I express my own frustration:

Warning, the following is crude enough to belong in the Pit

Goddamned motherfucking piece of shit!


I guess a rough translation of

“Nom de dieu de putain de bordel de merde de saloperie de connard d’enculé de ta mère.” (some of the de’s may be du’s, which changes the meaning a bit)

might be

Name of god of the whore of the brothel of shit of the filth of the asshole that butt-fucked your mother.

Makes a greeting card, doncha think?

I actually saw that movie with someone who was fluent in French. He busted up laughing at that scene.

Lord-a-mercy, that was worse than I imagined.