What's the nastiest thing you ever smelled?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

The dead crack addict we stumbled across when investigating an illegal rooming house.

Imagine someone who hasn’t bathed in…oh, say 5 years. No medical treatment either so he’s got that nice, “sick person” cast to him. He lives in a basement apartment that is about the size of a broom closet (actually, it was the space for the hot water heater). There’s lots of moisture in the air due to the location. The toilet facilities consisted of a bucket that hadn’t been emptied in who knows how long.

Yes, the smell of a moldering, wet, dead, crack addict and his fetid hovel takes the cake in my book.

And I thought I got into land use planning to color maps. Ha.

42

This is pretty tame given what’s been written here, but my nose is still traumatized…

I made a “bean bin” for my son–I bought about 15 lbs of dried beans and peas, all different colors and shapes, and put them in a rubbermaid bin. He could run his fingers through it, bury his toys, etc… it’s a wonderful developmental thing.

Except my husband got sick of finding random beans all over, so he put it out back. Where we never go. The lid got knocked loose, so rain water got it and the beans began rotting. And cooking in the sun. By the time I found the beans in this state, the smell was beyond memorable. I think what was worse is that it was a sweetish rotten smell. Argh. You know what beans can do in your gut–imagine that potential given ideal conditions to do its worst work.

Alas, there is a postscript. I dragged the mess to the woodsy area behind our house and dumped it out, doing my best not to gag. A few weeks later we are having a poker game, and my neighbor excuses himself to let his dog out (he’d been over for a number of hours). He is gone a long time. Then a knock on the door. There stands my neighbor with a grim look on his face. “Go on without me. I don’t know what Lakotah rolled in, but it’s horrible and I’ve got to bathe her.” I think nothing of it until I ask him where it was. He said “Somewhere behind your house. Could there be a dead deer in the woods?” And I realize what the dog has rolled in. Yipes.

43

Oh, I also forgot to mention the smell in the PCR lab a friend uses at work.

It’s right next to the monkey PART storage room.

44

It wasn’t me.

Anyway the worst smell I have ever smelled is the grease used in the rear gears of a 1980 Ford Fairmont. That stuff smelled like a combination of used fry oil, dead fish and motor oil. Only concentrated.

45

  1. Dimethylsulfoxide is nasty. It smells like evil fish and canned corn- it’s used as a solvent at the place I work.

  2. An ex cow-orker that bathed weekly, and changed clothes weekly (not always at the same time though, I think)

  3. Nasty Naughty Bits.

46

This doesn’t compare to most of what I’ve read here, but it’s pretty awful I think.

 Every summer, we go canoeing in Missouri on the Elk River.  My parents have friends that own 2 cabins right along the river, so we basically get to stay in them for free.  There's a big cabin and a smaller cabin.  Well, my friends, my brother and I naturally run to the small cabin because thats the one we stay in.  
 Opening the door, we smelled a God-awful stench.  Thinking maybe it was some kind of dead animal, we had to investigate.  Our noses led us to the bathroom.  In the stool was a massive dump that someone had taken probably a year earlier and had neglected to flush!  Oh it gets worse.  It had liquified into a kind of poop soup and there were MAGGOTS in it!

We have not stayed in those cabins since.

47

Cranky reminded me of another one - my dog, after he had rolled in a very rotten dead fish. He did this a lot, but one time in particular the fish must have been extra-rotten. My dog had this weird greenish slime around his ruff, and the smell was so awful, so horrible, I just can’t describe how bad it was. I remeber the car ride to my BF’s house (cause he had a basement utility shower, I wasn’t going to bathe this dog in my condo’s shower - ugh) with the windows rolled down all the way and I could still smell the dog - and he was so damn happy about smelling so bad! He gave me looks as I washed the stench off him, like “I worked hard at this Mom, why are you washing it off?”

48

I have 2:

  1. I was in Girl Scouts and the scout leader decided to take us on a field trip to a pig farm. The smell was absolutely horrendous (although it may have been normal for a pig farm, I’ve never been exposed to one before). The smell coupled with the sight of the “sick” pig area left me gagging for about a week. This was a combination of old, old trash, pig faeces, and yuck.

  2. I was a Histology tech in a veterinary lab at my last job. We had the general stinkiness of intestines, anal glands, and old tumors. The worse smell, however, was that of a 120-lb dead Rottweiler. When we would get necropsies, the lab required them to be “fresh,” which meant that they hadn’t been preserved in formalin. This particular Rottie had been found under a porch in Arizona during the summer (100 degrees +) after being dead about a week or so. At first, I noticed that death tanginess coming up through my vent in my fume hood; it got progressively stronger and eventually took over the entire lab. Luckily I was not the one in charge of performing the necropsies, so I didn’t get that fresh-from-the-body smell.

49

Thanks!!!

:: singing ::
“I don’t want a pickle, I just want to ride on my motor-sickle…”
You guys are definitely living up to my expectations! More please!

50

I second the pig farm. I don’t recall ever being in one; just driving by the one owned by relatives of my sister’s best friend was enough. Whenever one wanted to leave town headed west, they’d have to drive past that farm.

Then there’s the time we had our septic tank pumped. And the homeless person who stopped in to use the bathroom in the grocery store where I used to work. And sulphur dioxide, anyone who has smelled rotten eggs or travelled on I-10 between Lake Charles and Houston will recognize that one.

51

I just remembered another 1 . I was riding with my as he rode one of his friends home from work and this guy lives in the freakin boonies i tell you! Well anyway the guy lived next to what he said was a chicken farm or something like that and when he got out and opened the door all we could smell was years and years of built up fermenting chicken crap! and i know that doesnt sound to bad but then this moron stands there with the car door open talking about how bad the freakin smell was and hear i am gagging and telling this dude that if he doesnt close the door that im gonna blow chunks.

52

Mine is a toss-up between the time my family went on a road trip thru W. Virginia, and we found ourselves in a little town that consisted of a paper mill and a huge pig farm.

And then there was the time I went to look at an apartment which was in the attic of an old house. No one had lived there for a long time and the utilities had been turned off. The refrigerator was small so I had to open it to make sure there was enough room for all my food needs…
The smell hit about the same time I saw the gray furry thing on the top shelf. At first I thought some little critter had got locked up in there, but it turned out to be a hot dog.

53

It occurs to me after reading this thread with rapt attention that Coldfire shouldn’t complain about having to sift through all of the TMI threads that deal with zits, boils, etc. This thread is just as if not more disgusting. Bring it on.

54

I just remembered another one. Not as bad as the other two I posted, but humorus in how it happend.

Scene: 13 people on a bachelor party float trip, lots of beer, and amongst these people are 3 avid fishermen.

Well, about 4 hours into this float trip, we’re pretty lubed up from all the beer and all, and Mike sees this fish floating.

It’s a BIG fish. Well, Me, Mike and John start discussing what kind of fish it is, and well, me and Mike are both holding to it being a large Gar. Well, John, determined to prove us wrong, bet us $5 that it was a sturgeon, and proceeded to back paddle his innertube towards it.

Now we’re in a area where the river is wide, and almost no current due to the width, and he’s about 50’ - 100’ away from us. We’re all laughing 'cause we know what’s gonna happen when he disturbs this floating carcass.

Well, he finally reaches it, and moves it. His eyes get as big as silver dollars, and his face turned into one of the funniest grimaces i’d ever seen on someone’s face, and he starts wildy backpaddling away from it as FAST as he can.

Now we’re all having a good laugh from all this, until a stray breeze comes along and blows the stench RIGHT in our direction.

Needless to say that 50’ - 100’ that we were from him didn’t help one darn bit at that point.

We ended up firing up the engine on the johnboat, and everyone grabbed on to the boat to get us out of the general vicinity of that natural stinkbomb.

Oh, and I won the $5 :smiley:

55

Is there a term for gagging & laughing simultaneously??
If there is, i’d like to know wtf it is, because ive been doing it for the past 15 minutes while reading this thread.

OMFG! You poor bastards. I think we all need a keyring container of Staphene Spray, & Banish Deodorant Powder for unexpected nasal horror emergencies. (You can buy that stuff here: http://www.cpmbags.com) :smiley:

Mine will never compare to some of these things, but Ohhh boy have I got a smell for you.

A few years ago, i was given the treat of staying in a fairly nice shelter for battered & pregnant women. A few days into my little vacation, a new girl was brought in by the Police. She was oh, about 6’3, 250 lbs… with super short hair, bleached with black roots. They do her in processing and send her down the hall, to familiarize herself with the facilities, and her room.

She passes by me, and immediately im reminded of:
The dead of summer. On The hottest, most humid body of water on the planet. Where a fishing barge that is filled to double capacity, has been stuck for well over 6 months. Roasting, Baking, Rotisserizing, Whatever the fuck you’d like to call it…

This lady smelled like Death on A Corroded, Black Syphillus Infested Fish Stick!!!

It stuck - everywhere she went, like it had its own body.

The social workers & nurses gave her toiletries, new clothes, new underwear (All fresh from the store, that they purchased with their own money) Yet she refused to even enter her bathroom.
Almost like this Stench Creature were a part of her that she couldn’t bear to part with.

After several days, she was given a choice. To clean up, or leave.
She left.

56

I work in a public library, and we have an elderly gentleman patron who apparently subscribes to the old “take a bath on Saturday night before church and sweat through the rest of the week philosophy.”

He’s really quite nice, and considering his age the one bath a week thing might not be so unpleasant, but a few years ago the man had a stroke. He now doesn’t have bowel or bladder control. So, he goes to the bathroom in his clothes and wears the same outfit for days at a time, fermenting in the 100 degree, high-humidity Oklahoma heat. It’s beyond disgusting; he actually leaves a scent trail through the library. Ick.

-Kody

57

I have a love/hate relationship with this thread–it’s like I love onions, but I hate the eye irritation that comes with it. I find myself cringing and laughing at the same time. I do have one story that is mildly disgusting, certainly not up to the same standards as some of these entries.

When my two younger brothers were about 8-10 years old, they competed furiously with each other. It could be anything, sports, fighting, etc. One summer, they decided to torment each other with disgusting smells. There were the requisite fart wars, bowel movement contests, each more disgusting than the last one.

The most awful smell was the sneakers. About the end of July, my youngest brothers sneakers were at the end of their useful life. Tom decided to stink them up royally. He walked through dog poop, mud and also puddles to get the sneakers wet. Then he put the sneakers in a plastic bag and tied it, air tight. For some reason he forgot about the sneakers and the bag sat in the garage for about 3-4 weeks in all the heat and humidity of an August in Northern Virginia.

The heat and humidity were so intense the bag started to bulge. It was a discarded plastic shopping bag which wasn’t too sturdy. We’re not too clear on the details, but it seems my dad came home from work on Friday and somehow nicked the bag. For some reason, my mom didn’t need to go grocery shopping, there weren’t any movies anyone wanted to see, so the car sat there all Saturday. On Sunday morning when we went to church early in the morning, we trooped out to the car and piled in. A millisecond later, we all staggered out, crying and retching. It smelled like a diseased skunk had attacked the insides. The smell permeated the car for weeks. My two brothers spent every spare moment not in school or at church, scrubbing the car. That was the first time I can remember we skipped going to church. Man, that was nasty.

58

Oh, but I got more stink stories.

Once, while working for a gas/plumbing contractor in Georgia, we were called out on a long trip. I want to say that the place we went to was near plant Bowen (some kind of nuke power reactor). Anyway.

We were called out to remove and replace a refrigerator. (is that alliteration?) A simple task. Uncomfortable, as it was the middle of Georgia summer, but simple.

As I unloaded the new fridge from the back of the truck, J.C., who features prominently in BOTH of my stink stories, went around the side of the house, to where the old refrigerator was left on the patio.

I was wheeling the new one around the way when I was treated to a soft “fsssssssssht” sound, and J.C. staggering around the corner, retching.

See, when the old fridge died, the owners just took it outside and left it there. For the week that it was out there, I guess they just ate takeout. Regardless, this fridge sat in the sun for a solid week, completely full of food. The sound was the refrigerator compartment decompressing as the magnetic seal was broken.

I ran.

We taped the doors shut with duct tape before attempting to move it again.

59

I am too young to remember this for myself but my mother assures me that this is, arguably, the worst smell that was ever in our home. My next younger sister is about a year and a half behind me. So at one point my mother had two of us in diapers together. I was potty trained first but my sister was actually not all that far behind me, as my mom says I was hard to train, always to “busy getting into stuff” to want to stop. So when we are both finally trained the potty chair was put in the cellar. Apparently, when we would be playing down there we would still, unbeknownst to our folks, stop to use it. We didn’t disturb it so the odor didn’t manifest itself. Until one day my dad is working in the cellar and accidentally knocks it over. I guess he nearly threw up.

60

Actually, no, it’s not. Some of these stories are gruesome, but they’re all captivating reads in one way or another.

Reading about someone who willingly likes to pop someone’s ass zits isn’t.