Some of these remind me of this site, Overheard in the Office. Funny!
http://www.overheardintheoffice.com/
Um… why can’t they make a Halo 3?
(there’s already one, isn’t there?)
I’ve found that even in a decently performing high school class, I have to disctinctly point out that a vacuum is not something that sucks up other things. They seriously don’t know.
12th grade physics.
The best student in the school (dude has the kind of high-power brain that makes me wish we could find a way to hook it up to the power grid) is on the blackboard. He has to calculate the perimeter of a circle of radius 0.5; turns around and asks “anybody got a calculator?”
The teacher (nicknamed Bogart for a good reason) didn’t even move an eyelash. 38 students started rummaging about in their desks. I said “PI, duuuuude!” and then had to explain it slowly while Bogart laughed his ass off.
That has got to be the ugliest dog I ever did see? 
“Don’t worry Mom, I know about computers.”
Said by me after the 80th time my mom told me to back up my email address book, important messages, etc. and print them out. Shortly later, my computer crashed.
I think she finally stopped nagging me about that, 4 years later, but only because she’s been distracted by my sister giving birth and me getting good grades on my midterm.
About 3 weeks ago my son came home from school and asked " America was involved in the Korean war weren’t they?"
Some dumbarse (Canadian) teacher had told him America was NOT involved in the Korean war at all. New Zealand had a teacher shortage and actively sought teachers from elsewhere…those Candians really pay off.
This is the stupidest thing you have heard? And you have even actually been to a sermon?
Ehm… That is sort of the principle of vaccination. Except that you use few, weakened or dead infectants, so that you don’t get noticably sick. (Hopefully.)
Funny.
I don’t understand the first part of your sentence though, “different kind of whore”. Are you saying that you actually are a prostitute? Also, how are you doin’?
Well, she’s a lawyer, so I gathered that to be extremely tongue-in-cheek with a heavy dose of the rolleyes.
Shortly after the US captured Saddam Husein my dad’s neighbor tells us that Bush is certain to win the Nobel peace prize for his work in Iraq. Dad and his wife heartily agree. Every time I think about it it pisses me off.
During a discussion of evolution, a woman said: “If we’re descended from monkeys, tell me this: WHY ARE THERE STILL MONKEYS??” Said with an 'I rest my case" attitude.
In college, a friend and I were replacing the internal workings of the toilet in his apartment as the landlord would do nothing about it and he was tired of hearing the water run (I guess water was considered ‘included’, no matter how much was used). He had his tools out, I had my tools out, and he and I were about to get started when his girlfriend (who I swear channeled Terri Garr) asked if we had unplugged it yet.
“Unplugged what?”
“Have you unplugged the toilet…?” :dubious:
“Um…I don’t know how to tell you this, but toilets don’t have ‘plugs’.”
“…Then how do they work…?”
A 5 minute explanation of water pressure and plumbing ensues, after which she leaves the room.
“Hey, what’s her major anyway?”
“Ceramic Engineering.” :smack:
He could have meant that he couldn’t connect the name to the face, or the first name to the last name. I myself am sort of infamous for asking “stupid questions” that are never stupid when I explain how I meant them.
Co-workers: “We are going to see the town of Stratford on Avon”
Me: “Oh, what can be seen there?”
C-workers (rolleyes) “Stratford on Avon is where William Shakespeare was born!”
**Me **(thinking) Yes, I know that. But what is there to be seen? It is common knowledge that we know almost nothing of Shakespeare’s personal life. And even if we did, unless you are writing an essay on the man IMHO it isn’t very fruitful to try and explain the worth of a work of art by looking at the personal life of the writer. So the works of Shakespeare can be best read for themselves, using annotations for background info. So, what good can a visit to Stratford on Avon do?
Many of the examples of stupidity in this thread don’t sound stupid to me. Just ignorant. When I hear something ignorant I always try to spot why someone would think that. For instance, a friend of mine thought the phases of the moon went from full to empty in one night. Of course, I thought. When you only look at the moon consciously a few times a month, you see it change shape in what seems almost one night; and you’ve heard the phrase used " new moon" it is an easy thought mistake to make. Moonphases are an example ot the tidbits that people don’t really need to know, so IMHO a mistake is no big deal.
And then there are the people who are not stupid, just conformist. Creationists don’t care about the truth about evolution; they care deeply about defending a beliefsystem. I despise that attitude deeply, but it is not stupid persé. Often a lot of ingenuity goes into twisting the facts to fit the creationist’ theory.
Some friends and I met a fellow high school classmate some years after graduation. As we talked and coaught up on our respective lives, I mentioned something I had recently read. She piped up, “You READ??!! Gawd, I haven’t read anything since I got out of high school!”
Conversation stopped. She blushed as she realized the stupidity of the statement and quickly changed the subject.
So she was majoring in… mud? 
To be fair, you do SORTA plug in a toilet, just not necessarily like she was thinking. You have to connect it to the water system, right?
See, and I would have said the Gulf Stream was air, not water. :o
My father thought I was being dumb when we were watching a crime drama and he doubted that someone would die from being stabbed in the “stomach”, below the ribs. I said maybe they hit the aorta and he doubted it ran there. Please tell me I was right!
“There’s some lovely filth over here!”
Overheard from two hairdressers while I was waiting to get my hair cut (so I couldn’t correct them!). “Band on the Run” plays on the Muzak
Hairdresser 1: I hate the Beatles.
Hairdresser 2: But they invented Rock n Roll!
Me: 