So somebody else on this board knows this awful flick?
God, yes. I was about eleven when I saw it on TV. Early 60’s. I enjoyed it although even idiot kid Moi was disappointed with the pathetic monster at the end. I tried to watch it a second time just a few years ago on a whim - it was cringe-inducing.
Let me add to the chorus of Highlander 2 nominations, at least within the expectation breaking subcategory.
I went to it on opening night with a group of fans of the first movie. We were so, so disappointed. Uniformly we hated it, in a group of ten or so. We had an argument about whether the writer had seen the first one, and decided that he had to have done so- it was unlikely he could have gotten absolutely everything exactly wrong by chance.
The Phantom Menace had some of the same elements of getting fundamental plot points wrong (The Force is all about midichlorians! Jedi are evil child abusers!) but those could arguably be just bad plot developments/reveals rather than wholesale contradiction of prior art. I ended up more sad than angry.
Thanks to you and EC Geek. I should be able to abiide as long as you keep those Whiite Russiians coming… 
I thought of another one. Has anyone mentioned Cabin Boy yet? Chris Elliott made dozens of appearances on Letterman but, as Dave mentioned once, he had never appeared in an actual movie so Chris put him in a 2 minute segment of his idiotic Cabin Boy movie. Here’s a link to the Letterman scene in case you missed it…
I’ve said it before and will again; the ONLY problem with Jurassic Park is the dinosaurs didn’t eat enough people. Consider:
John Hammond (Richard Attenborough) should obviously have been devoured. In fact, he kind of vanishes for most of the movie’s third act, only to appear at the helicopter. Clearly, a wasted opportunity for someone to be eaten, and there would have been some poetic justice in it, though we’d have lost his cool line “So have I.”
Dr. Wu (BD Wong) clearly should have been eaten. The character was eaten in the book. BD Wong is a good actor, deserved more than one scene, and he could totally pull off the screams of a man being turned into dinosaur chow. Why was he not eaten?
As to the OP, I stand by what I wrote many years ago, on this very message board:
"‘Highlander II’ attains, if that’s the right word, a nadir of suckitude that, prior to seeing it, I would not have imagined possible. Actually, COULDN’T have imagined possible; the level of its putridness went beyond the conceivable parameters of cinema suckosity, and its suckitude seeped into all that surrounded it. It made other movies showing at the multiplex at the same time worse than they otherwise would have been, just by its proximity. It made me a worse person for having watched it. It despoiled the very money with which I paid for the horror of seeing it, currency that I am sure was eternally cursed by association, and which doubtlessly brought misfortune and suffering to all who handled it from that day forward.
As a matter of fact, the multiplex it was shown it ended up going out of business, the only modern multiplex I’ve ever heard of that did that. Coincidence? Not a chance, Vance. “Highlander II” was like a infectious disease, an E. cinema, a sort of supernatural rot. It hurt the soul. It made the baby Jesus cry. It made the babies Buddha, Mohammed, and Cthlulu cry. The very force of its suckness was beyond the measuring capacity of any scientific instrument designed by man.
I could explain why it sucked, but really, there isn’t enough time in my life to do so. Every scene, every word, every shot, ever single frame sucked, but more than sucking individually, they combined in sucking ways to attain a perfect synchronicity of suck. I can’t describe how bad it was; there aren’t words that would do the job. I would tell you that you should watch it to see how bad it was, but no, you really shouldn’t. I don’t hate anyone that much."
I have another nomination.
Many years ago, my siblings and I, gathered at our parents home for a holiday, rented Popeye, starring Robin Williams and Shelley Duvall. We thought it would be a fun movie, but we turned it off in favor of a card game after about a 1/2 hour.
I don’t remember exactly why it sucked so bad, other than everybody was overacting horribly and the story seemed stupid.
I’ve enjoyed Robin Williams’ work in other movies, particularly The Fisher King and One Hour Photo, but Popeye was about the worst thing he ever did.
Not even Trump?
Alien Resurrection is the worst movie I ever saw. I so wish I had walked out instead of watching it. It is disgusting and bad and disgustingly bad in many, many ways.
Howard the Duck was another big stinker
Like I said, by no means was it great but it had moments. You can also see the actor that was to become the great Tom Hanks developing.
You want to lose 18 minutes of your time? Here you go…
(SFW, but may put you to sleep at your desk)
It really was a terrible movie, but it did give us one of the greatest lines of Western cinema: “You’ve been like the drunken, abusive grandfather I never had.”
:: Golf clap ::
White House Down is probably the only movie I got legitimately angry a third of the way through the movie and left the theater to get my money back. Wound up eventually watching it for free on NetFlix and its somehow even worse later on.
Basically there were two White House Under Attack movies that same summer, Olympus Has Fallen came first with Gerard Butler. It was an incredibly dumb but still enjoyable serious action flick that made the most of its premise with great action and set-pieces. The problem with *White House Down * was that it had no idea what it wanted to be. In theory it’s suppose to be an action-comedy with Channing Tatum and Jamie Fox but the tone was completely uneven and all over the place. The comic relief in the film almost feels like it was an after-thought that they threw in when they realized Olympus Has Fallen was going full serious with its premise. What actually made me angry about the movie is that it’s one of those movies where the film could have literally ended 4 different times early into the movie if any of the characters had a brain or even acted like a real person would act. The entire film only progresses because the main characters make the dumbest decisions over and over again. The scene that made me leave was when the Presidential Limo is being chased by terrorists driving armed trucks across the White House lawn in full view of hundreds of assembled police and soldiers. At no point does anybody on the police/military decide to assist despite the fact there’s literally nothing stopping them from assisting and the Presidential Limo is just doing donuts on the front lawn while terrorists in trucks are constantly shooting at it. There’s also the fact Channing Tatum who’s driving the limo with the President in the backseat doesn’t actually attempt to reach the line of military soldiers who are literally just dozens of yards away from him. Instead he actually drives BACK to where more terrorists are for whatever reason. If the main character wasn’t going to bother trying to save himself I decided right then and there I wouldn’t bother to watch it.
I love me some Bad Movies, but they have to be bad enough to be Bad. They can’t just be bad.
Brother Bear is bad, and not Bad. Dull, formulaic, and with the gripping interest of a hair cut. It’s not even bad enough to be fun to mock, and it seems almost unfair to try. Like making fun of the guy who finishes seventh in the Special Olympics. Like Roger Ebert said, a movie which is not better than an hour and a half of blank screen.
I believe there was a sequel, but I am not that much of an optimist, or masochist.
Regards,
Shodan
What really angered me about this film is what a horrible job they did of “adapting” Michel Faber’s novel, which was beautifully written, lyrical, sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes humorous, and at times stomach-churning, with a strongly ironic and satirical look at the way we treat animals we end up eating. (The humans abducted in the film are to be used for aliens’ food.)
In the book, the alien woman’s name is Isserley, her species walks on four legs, and she had to be surgically altered to pass for human, although she suffers a lot of pain as a result and is not attractive. And did any of this make it into the film version? Nope. Not one bit. And I am still pissed about it.
Last night my daughter dialled up “The Gadget Gang in Outer Space”, and it became an immediate candidate for this thread. The animation is terrible, the plot is stupid, the humor is feeble and some of the characters are kinda racist (bucktoothed bespectacled Asian kid, I’m looking at you in particular).
Imagine the Jimmy Neutron movie with a tenth of the budget, creativity and skill and you’d get this. Weirdly, the reviews aren’t that bad. I can only assume this was on the basis on “It kept my child diverted for an hour and a half so it’s all good”.
This movie might have some love here, but the only movie I walked out on was “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid”. Hated it.
Loved it.
So there.