Yes, to be clear that was showing how it works, not advice for your situation.
Years ago (15+), when I was considering purchasing a handgun, I did a lot of research. I looked at models online, read about the differences between them. I found a few that looked really appealing. I then went to a dealer who had a range and asked to try them out, as they had the models I was interested in available there.
I tried them and to my dismay, they felt clunky and awkward in my hands.
The dealer suggested I try a Glock. And I did. It was a lot better, but too blocky for my hands.
He then suggested a S&W M&P40c. I tried that out, and it felt like it was made for my hand. It wasn’t even on my radar before. It was easy to shoot, comfortable to hold. That was the gun I bought. All of the research and planning didn’t mean anything once I actually had a gun in my hand. It ended up just coming down to ergonomics in my case.
OK thanks. And that’s the thing. I don’t want this to become a situation.
I just bought electronic hearing gun range hearing ‘muffs’ and my wife and I should be able to talk, but should blank out the bang of the gun range.
That’s huge for my wife. Small hands, has had a couple of broken fingers. We first thought the Lady Smith, but the light weight will not be comfortable to practice with.
My hands are also on the small size, despite being an adult male who is roughly average in height (low end of the “average” scale). Or not my hands in general, it’s just that I have stubby fingers; I usually call them my Vienna sausages. (They’re not really that small, they rarely cause problems for me, but that’s just my sense of humor.) I think that was the main problem for me.
You didn’t snipe at me, but I extend sympathy anyway, we all have those sensitive subjects issues!
Really, we all need to let her shoot a variety of weapons, and then decide. Many years ago, I remember the instructor at my CCW training asking how many people had already purchased guns, and it was quite a lot - and many/most had bought without earlier experience. When I saw the selection, almost all either bought too much, or too little gun.
Again, a friend bought a S&W Shield EZ in .380, because he has a touch of arthritis. I linked it upthread, but here’s a description from S&W about it - and it’s inexpensive enough to probably not worry about it as a second/spare option.
https://www.smith-wesson.com/article/what-makes-shield-ez-easy
But again, let’s let her shoot a variety and then buy, though with recent events… I get the feeling of wanting it immediately.
[looks at just closed tab with another 190 rounds of ammo purchased]
Yeah, I took the training before getting a gun. Actually, I wasn’t even sure I was going to get one before the training. It was the training that made me comfortable. Plus, when I had an instructor leading me in shooting a pistol, I was able to actually have fun. That fun is what pushed me over the edge.
The one piece of advice the instructor said about buying a gun is that you don’t need to spend a lot on a gun. It’s better to spend, say, $500 on a gun and $500 on training than $1,000 on a gun. Which is almost exactly what @Crafter_Man said above, funny enough. 
(The instructor was really cool, he was a SWAT guy with Pierce County, specifically Tacoma, WA. Very patient, gave good, practical advice about the law, safety, and tips about shooting.)
I’m glad I didn’t even think about what to get until after that training, because I was a lot more informed when it was time to start considering what model to get.
Funny enough, that Shield line (in general) is extremely similar to my own pistol.
And mine, like I said upthread I have a S&W M&P9c as a carry gun. And I bought it because, like you, the ergonomics of it in the hand were just that much better for me than the Glock.
I missed that! Yeah, you have the same pistol as me in just a different caliber. 
This is what I would like to see for my Wife. If she doesn’t ‘feel’ it. No worries. It has to be fun, or it will be a chore to train.
We are also looking at this as another activity in our newly found retirement. We play chess and darts every night. Darts is a very much hand eye coordination. Shooting should fit in for my wife.
Moon clips are very easy to deal with and make reloading extremely smooth. Much easier than using speed loaders which can be quite clumsy.
It kind of seems like you have pre-thought out biases about what kind of firearm and features you want without even checking options out in person.
As I said, we have been to 3 gun stores. We have thought about options. And as I said I’ve been a shooter for 50 years. I want my wife to find what is right and comfortable for her. I’m not planning on pressuring her in any dirrection. She wants a .38 at this point. Which is fine. Not what I would choose for myself, but this is not gonna be my gun. She needs the whole tamale of professional training, and we will see that she gets it.
I linked a Ruger Mark IV from their web store, in another thread. It has the standard trigger. There is a California model. I didn’t look closely to see what changes.
I wouldn’t trust a double, safety trigger in self-defense. People are encouraged to go a range and develop muscle-memory for inserting a clip, racking the slide, proper grip, and shooting. Clearing jams has to be muscle-memory too.
Buy a used pistol. Either locally from an individual or a licensed FFL dealer. There are so many pistols available to buy. Why buy a recent one with a weird and maybe unreliable trigger system?
Use a gun safe at home.
If this is an EDC, why not some sort of Derringer?
Sig, FN, Cz, Beretta, and Glock all offer trigger safeties. These companies do not make junk; each is anal-retentive above quality. I’d like to see evidence their trigger safeties are “unreliable”.
Having said that, and as I’ve mentioned previously, I don’t like the “feel” of trigger safeties, and think they’re essentially useless. I think they only exist because lawyers for firearm manufacturers have insisted on them.
IMHO - but derringers are Dangerous with uncovered triggers, carried loose in a way to encourage Negligent discharges, have such short barrels as to be inaccurate past punching range, and impossible to control in most calibers except .22LR - faaaaar better choices unless you’re a riverboat gambler shooting someone across the poker/faro table.
Not to mention one of the scenarios the OP was worried about was local cougars/mountain lions coming for the pets - not ideal for .22LR unless you’re a precision shooter of the highest caliber.
Yea.
Just my opinion, but .22LR is not a good choice for real-world defense against two-legged and four-legged threats. .22LR is mainly used for plinking, training, and hunting small stuff like squirrels.
Pets and people. A woman was recently killed by a cougar in a mountain park not far from here. My wife hasn’t gone hiking there. Yet.
I live in mountain lion country and don’t bother carrying any kind of defense other than a bell at dawn and dusk. Those boogers can hit 50mph and leap 40 feet. I don’t believe I could hit one, not with a thousand hours at the range. I take heart in the fact that there have only been 30 fatal attacks in the US over the last century.
I remember a notable attack in Washington state back when I lived there. A varsity wrestler got jumped. He got the cat in a headlock and started with eye gouges. The cat decided there was better prey elsewhere.
Yeah, understood. And I prefer the bear spray alternative. But I would like my wife to know how to shoot. She brought it up.
What if in some weird situation she found a gun and needed it. Or needed to unload it.
Also, if someting is stalking you at a distance, spray may not work. A gunshot into the ground may make them change their minds.
I’ve done that with bears. Bear sitting there scoping out the house. No amount of noise would scare them off. Well a 30.30 into a tree next to them got them to change their minds.