Hey, you were the one that said you hated me - if I don’t know your style of posting, I don’t know how else to read that.
I shouldn’t speak here anymore. I have my own Board to whine and bitch and moan and gripe on, and people there are accustomed to my insanity and know how to tune me out when I have my bi-weekly mental collapse arising from no sleep and overwork.
Nice art, BTW. You have a really fantastic talent, and I always envy those who can draw or paint well. The hat on the characters, however, reminds me of Stevie Nicks, circa 1979. But then I’m a mean and cranky old bitch and would say something critical like that.
astro - even if I was still getting help, what good does it do? It doesn’t change the end result. Eat my gun today or live to 90, it doesn’t matter. It’s all exactly the same.
No, I’m most assuredly not suicidal. I have too many people who like me, and too many enemies left to crush. I think, IIRC, the author of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance came to the same conclusions that I did, but answered his own question of “why not get it all over with” with “Because…I just don’t want to.” And I guess that’s how I feel.
I’ve shot at another human being. (Non military or police related)
I have no complusions agains killing another human being if comes to that.
I have no complusions against eating another human being if it is required for survival. I would not, however, kill another human for food and would rather starve than kill another unnessicarily.
I also obsess about my mortality. I cannot sleep longer than 6 hours on average and often have difficulty getting to sleep feeling that I’m wasting time.
I havent gotten 1 email in 7 months. Not even spam.I once hit a dog with my car ,when i figured out that it was dead, It took me 3 weeks to stop crying when I passed the spot where i hit him. Those secrets have been eating at me for quite a while.
Oh yeah. I started cursing when I was 9 (not near mom of course)
Anthracite, once your light goes out, your awareness goes with it. That means the only state you’ll ever experience is life. You’ll never be dead.
Now whether that life sucks or not, that’s up to you and the secret government agents clandestinely controlling every aspect of your life…
If it helps, here’s a brief list of reasons to exist:
Good beer from a cooler
Empty canvases
Girls (or boys; whatever rubs your buddha)
Rock bands with horn sections
Dogs
The United States Federal Interstate Highway System
Pastrami on rye
Unlike Anthracite, I can’t wait for death. Not that I’m suicidal, I’m too Catholic for that. But I keep hoping for that aneurysm or terminal illness. Being religious has given me a strong belief in an afterlife. If I am not happy here, I just hope that whatever is next brings me some happiness. And if it’s nothing, that’s okay, too.
I really don’t like people. I’ve always been happiest alone. I think I’d be happiest living alone in a space station, completely self-sufficient, with plenty of enclosed ‘wild’ areas, and a few robots tooling around for me to program and modify. Kinda like Silent Running.
Watching old Star Trek episodes (Original Series only) makes me want to program in FORTRAN 77.
My family has intermarriedwith the Deep ones, and when Cthulu rises from his eons-long sleep to rule the world again, we shall witness his glory, and your destruction.
:o