Often times when I wake up in the morning I feel like I’ve worked hard all night. In my dreams I’m still grappling with whatever has concerned me during the day. How do I turn it off and get some rest?
I don’t think there is an easy answer to that. I’m a chronic insomniac, and I haven’t found the solution, though there are things that can help.
For most people, sleeping pills don’t really help rest, they just help sleep, so that’s something I’d avoid if you’re sleeping through the night otherwise. You might want to see a doctor and see if there are any health issues affecting your sleep (apnea?).
What’s your routine like? Do you work/read/do mentally active things right until bedtime? Do you read in bed (the #1 way for me to spend the night thinking, usually about the book!). Change your bedtime routine so that the last hour or so of the day is spent doing something relaxed and passive - that should help give your brain a chance to relax and help you rest through the night.
How much caffeine or sugar or other stimulants do you take? Avoid drinking coffee, tea, caffeinated beverages or overly sweet drinks in the evening - or even the afternoon. I basically can’t even drink a single can of Coke Zero after 6 or 7pm if I expect to sleep well that night! Cut back on dessert or other sweet/sugary things in the evening too.
Keep your bedroom reserved for sleep (and sex) - take out distractions like books, computers and television. As comfortable as it might be to read or watch TV or surf the web in bed, it’s forcing your brain to be somewhat active in the environment where it should be relaxed. If your sleeping space is reserved for sleeping, you can help condition yourself to sleep better in that space.
Also, the #1 rule that is a fantastic idea that no one ever cares to follow - get up and go to sleep at the same time every day, even weekends (yeah, right!). If you have a set routine that you never deviate from, your brain will learn. Unfortunately, at least IMHO, that’s a crappy life (6am on a Saturday should only be experienced when approaching it from one direction!)
These things all help somewhat, but they don’t really cure anything completely. Welcome to the Club 
Try adding 30 minutes of aerobic exercise at least 2 hours before you want to go to sleep.
Thanks. I just got up from a nap (which blows what mnemosyne suggested.) I’m going to try these. Tire out the body but relax the mind. Maybe I can stop chopping the wood for my own ZZZZZs.
Echoing Qadgop’s suggestion for aerobic exercise. Walking doesn’t do it for me; I need to exercise hard at least every other day in order to sleep soundly.
Other people I’ve talked to who have problems sleeping soundly stress the importance of at least an hour of quiet time before bed, and that means not screen time. Television and computers will both bork their sleep. Dunno if it’s the case for you, but it’s something to keep in mind.
Just a very slim chance at a long shot but… Could you possibly be getting too much sleep? Maybe you’re in bed for eight hours, but your body really only needs six hours of sleep?
This is something I notice on weekends, when sleeping in. Till noon. (Luxury!) The longer hours of sleep get sort of diluted, “like butter, scraped over too much bread” (Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings.)
If your body knows it’s only going to get six hours, then it tends to “make the most of it.”
If you do take this in to consideration, please be careful. It’s the kind of idea that could make things worse, not better, if it isn’t actually what’s going on in your case!
If you have insurance, a sleep study should tell you what you need to know. If you don’t have insurance, do you know anyone who could watch/listen to you sleep? Or could you record yourself sleeping for a night and see if you stop breathing?
FWIW, I heard this complaint a lot from family members who ended up getting diagnosed with sleep apnea. They could sleep any number of hours but never feel rested.
Seconding the sleep study suggestion. I frequently woke up as tired as when I went to sleep. I was diagnosed with sleep apnea, With my CPAP I can sleep and IT DOES ME SOME GOOD.
It could be possible I’m getting too much sleep, as Trinopus suggests. As I’ve gotten older I’ve started taking a nap every day. Maybe that’s sabotaging my nighttime sleep? I started to ask if a cup of coffee would be good, or a Mountain Dew etc. but would mid-afternoon be too early for the exercise? (About all I can do is walk.)
Also, I’ve always been a night owl.
you should work our or running or go for a long walk. might help
There is a level of sleep deeper than REM sleep or dreaming. If you’re not getting to that deepest level then you may feel tired like you say.
What are you dreaming about? What concerns you in your day to day that troubles you in your sleep?
I have the same problem, but complicated by the fact that feeling my body tire out is exactly what makes my mind go into stress-induced overdrive. What on earth does one do about that?
You don’t even need a full sleep study for an initial check of sleep apnea. A take home pulse-ox is a lot easier. You get to sleep in your bed at your normal time in your normal position with only one wire (which may even be on a wrist-strap) I’d only just do a sleep study first if I didn’t have the insurance.
Wish that had been what was wrong with me.
I’m dreaming about the things I’m trying to do during the day: paying bills, making sure there’s enough food on the table, juggling egos and responsibilities. I’d really like a break, but I don’t know how to force myself to have a “Disney Dream.”