When my FIL asks me for medical advice, now I just assume we need an ambulance

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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My FIL is a decent enough guy. Former military, retired Airline Captain, he roams the North American Continent in his giant RV, along with MIL, his NRA stickers, and lots of weaponry. And two yappy dogs. He’s enjoying his retirement.

We get along fine. He’s known me since I was 15, which was when I started dating his daughter. He never tried to kill me during my adolescent years, nor did he even threaten to (tho he would have if he had known what was going on).

Perhaps it is his memory of me as that nerdy teen dating his youngest child that has prevented him from taking my current medical expertise seriously. Or perhaps it’s just his stoic nature, to not complain, or to impose on me, with queries about what’s going on with his body. After all, he’d not complained a bit to me when he had unstable anginal pains due to a critical blockage and a coronary aneurism the size of a walnut. (He survived that because MIL complained to me on the sly via telephone, and I suggested she take him to the hospital).

Yet since then FIL has broken down and asked me for medical advice. Twice. And both times proved interesting.

The first was about 6 years ago, IIRC. They’d driven their RV up from Florida to visit, and parked it nearby. My MIL and Mrs. Mercotan had gone out shopping and when I returned from work, I popped in on FIL.

FIL: 6 foot 6, 330 pounds, I’d seen him in years past do auto repair by lifting up one corner of a car in one hand. But that day he didn’t look so hot. Climbing the 3 steps into the RV left him sweaty, out of breath, and gave him tunnel vision. He asked me what I thought he should do!

Having my stethoscope handy, I listened to his heart, and heard a HELL of a heart murmur. Grade V/VI, blowing, harsh, midsystolic. Gee, that’s not good. Hey FIL, I’ve an idea, let’s go to the ER. When? Howzabout now? You’re ready and willing to go? Holy…

Well, one new aortic valve later (he had critical aortic stenosis, valve area just under 5 mm square) along with some rehab, and they’re back on the road again!

Fast forward to about 10 days ago. FIL and MIL have stationed their RV in Branson, MO. Just about their favorite place in the world. Except MIL calls me, asks me to talk to FIL. He’s feeling puny. In fact, he complains to me that he feels worse than he did before his valve job. Can I make him an appointment with his heart doctor that fixed his valve 6 years ago? He can drive the RV the 600 miles up there and be there pretty quick. Mostly he feels ok when he’s sitting really really still, and driving is kinda like sitting still…

Fortunately now I’ve got enough street cred with him to pursuade him to go to the nearest ER. I even find it for him on the internet. Of course, he insists on driving there, but still…

His heart rate is 34, a somewhat untenable position for someone who’s not a super-athlete. They keep him around a while, put in a pacemaker, and send him back to his RV. Feeling much better, too.

And now he’s in the RV, and heading our way…

When he gets here, if he asks me for medical advice, I’m just going to pick up the phone and pre-dial a 9 and a 1 before he even tells me how he’s feeling.

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Damn, this was supposed to go in MPSIMS, not the pit!

Could somebody ask a mod to move it for me, via the miracle of the “report post” button? Thanks!

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Moving thread from The BBQ Pit to MPSIMS.

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Now that’s what I call service. Thanks.

5

When was the last time FIL had a physical?

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Actually he saw his cardiologist a month or two ago. So he’s sorta pissed.

Same thing happened just before his valve job. Saw his heart doc, who told him everything was fine. He was pissed then too, and switched cardiologists. To the one who just saw him a month or two ago.

Hey, maybe at the time he didn’t have a heart block. I don’t know.

7

Your father-in-law sounds like the one-hoss shay (anyone remember the one-hoss shay)?, except that critical portions of his heart were originally put in by an inferior supplier.

I just love those family moments. Fifteen years ago (I still grab my own chest when I think about it) the family called from 3000 miles away to say my dad had gone faint while doing Nauticus at the gym, and he was in the ER about to be admitted, and “the EKG was going up at the end”.

What? What? QT elevations? Some sort of trouble in the twelfth lead? What???

Turned out he was having a vasovagal response to exercise and he was fine. Sheesh.

I never will forget those moments of fury and incapacity at the inability to translate out of family into medical…

Not that they match an aortic valve with a 5 mm gap or a heart rate of 35.

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Stupid fingers in the morning - make that ST elevations, please.

QT elevations is when you bow down to the Mercotan on the hill.

NTTAWWT.

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Sadly, my dad insisted that his pains were nothing and refused Mom’s suggestion that he go to the ER. They were in Houston, enroute to San Diego (via RV) to take their 50th wedding anniversary cruise to Hawaii. He dropped dead that night in the shower. Yeah, he was just a bit stubborn, and I expect he was probably in denial. He’d had heart surgery and was on all kinds of meds… oh well.

Lesson learned - if my spousal unit ever complains or looks “off”, I’ll be dragging him to the ER, by the short hairs, if necessary. And if I have pains, I’ll probably consider the ER for myself… The DNA for stubborn runs pretty deep in my family.

10

I don’t see anything wrong with that. My best friend is an RN (no longer working, after three kids), and her training has saved the life of her husband and her oldest daughter.

The hubby found a bump on his neck while shaving one day and was going to blow it off. He mentioned it to her- she took one look/feel and got a sitter for the kids. They went straight to the ER and he had surgery for thyroid cancer the next day. He was only 30 at the time. The docs said they probably wouldn’t have caught it in time if she hadn’t insisted on bringing him in (it was kind of bad).

Her daughter was stung by a bee when she was 7. Lisa cleared the stinger and asked her if she felt okay. About 2 minutes later, her daughter asked for a drink of water because her throat felt scratchy. Another minute or so goes by, and now her daughter is really coughing. Yep, you guessed it- anaphalactic shock. Her airway was closing, and fast. Lisa threw all three kids in the van and hauled ass down the canyon to the ER (ambulances sometimes have a tough time in the hills, and no one drives faster and with more determination than a mom with a sick kid). Now we know that my goddaughter is severely allergic and there are epi pens scattered all over the house, school, family members, etc.

Lisa says that her training has made her just paranoid enough. I agree. And worth every penny she spent…

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I wouldn’t call you either, Qadgop. Obviously, Qadgop = serious illness. So if you don’t call, it isn’t serious.

StG