When people hear I’m a computer technician, they immediately ask me a really dumb question about computers.
You?
divorced with kids; are no long interested in me romantically.
When people hear i’m a gynecologist, they immediately show me their vagina.
well, no. but they should. for their own sake
When people hear I work at a college, they immediately exclaim about how nice it must be to have summers off.
I do not have summers off.
When people hear I’m a lawyer, they immediately assume I’m wealthy. I wish.
When people hear I’m a nurse, they immediately begin describing all of their current health issues along with those of their immediate family, and assume I want to hear about it. They also assume that my schedule is whatever I want it to be because of the “nursing shortage.”
When people heard I owned a horse, they immediate thought I was posh and very wealthy. And proceeded to tell me about this one time, they went horsebackriding and they got a CRAAAAZY horse that GALLOPPED away with them :rolleyes:
When people hear I’m a paleontologist, they immediately ask “Like Ross, from Friends?” (or ask if cloning dinosaurs is possible, or ask me about a recent archaeology find)
When people hear I’m a railfan, they immediately say, “So you’re one of those train nuts, eh?”
HA HA HA HA…
Whenever people hear I’m a paramedic, they immediately do what Kerrigan said!.
When people hear I’m a Web site developer with my own Web site developing company, they immediately tell me about their nephew who took a Web class in school and has done a couple of Web sites and want me to offer to look at his resume.
I just smile and say “that’s nice.”
When people hear I’m an astrophysicist, they immediately either back away slowly or ask me what their star sign is.
When people hear I’m a homeschooler, they immediately say “I could never do that.”
Someday I will snap and agree with them. 
When people hear that my husband is a software developer, they immediately tell him about their computer problems. He is a very nice person and frequently fixes them.
When people hear I work in theatre, they immediately ask if I’m an actor.
When people hear I’m a leper, they start in telling me about their* fucking * psoriasis!
When people hear I’m a roleplayer, they immediately ask if I don’t know that roleplaying leads to satanism/psychotic episodes/ritual murder.
When people hear I’m a writer, they immediately ask to read what I’m working on at the moment. Little do they know that that’s an invasion of privacy on the level of asking me to strip naked in the street, so they never understand why I start growling and shaking my fists.
God, preach it sister! AND they won’t let up about the symptoms, either. And then they move on to the last time they had any connection with a nurse–even if that was a school nurse 30+ years ago. If they were treated badly, we are expected to apologize (wtf?); if they were treated well, we are supposed to be pleased (again, wtf?). I really don’t tell anyone anymore that I’m a nurse. Things have improved, though–when I was young and cute, I used to get asked if I went into nursing to “get a doctor”. Truth telling time: of course I did. There was absolutely no other reason to enter the profession. Sadly, the only docs I ever met were either too short, too married, too not my religion/ethnicity/sexual orientation and in any case, I never had a doc come on to me seriously. I had a lecherous son of a bitch try to feel me up–a fat, balding doc. Other than that-bupkus. It blighted my life and I fell into deep depression…
When people hear I’m in the marching band, they immediately ask if I know “so-and-so who plays trombone, or maybe trumpet, I don’t remember. Anyway, she has kinda long hair, and she’s kinda tall, but not that tall.” No, sorry. There’s almost 300 of us, and I know relatively few people outside of my own section. (Alto sax, in case you were wondering. Which is the other thing they always ask.)
When people hear I’m a librarian, they immediately want to hump me.
No, not really.
When people find out I’m a computer security analyst and work for a bank, they either:
A) Ask dumb questions about why their AOL doesn’t work.
Do I look like the flipping Geek Squad? I don’t even like AOL, and I don’t do Windows.
B) Ask if I can get them samples of money/better interest rates/add money to their account/etc.
Nope. No free money and I have no access to financial transactions. There’s also a whole code of ethics that I have to abide by thanks to my relationships with entities like the FBI and (ISC)[sup]2[/sup].
C) Ask if I carry a gun.
You apparently have me confused with the guys driving the armored cars.