Stupid fucking immune system. The pollen in the air is not going to kill me, so quit having an allergic reaction like it is going to!
Damn hair. No matter what I do or don’t do with it, it gets split ends like a week after I get it cut.
Victoria is in the middle of a drought at the moment so everyone is conserving water where they can; everyone except the tenants in our investment property. We just got a notice from the water company telling us that water usage there has been excessive. For a 5 person household usage of 809 litres a day is considered high. The dipshit tenants have been using 1509 litres a day.
Despite the fact that all the newspapers can talk about is the water shortage it doesn’t occur to the tenants that maybe it’s not a good idea to leave the shower on all day, or run the washing machine with just a sock. Stupid, selfish brats.
You know what would be a good idea for car manufacturers to do. A new feature where the driver can show which direction they’re intending to take when they arrive at an intersection. Perhaps a pair of lights on either side of the car, front and back, which would flash when it’s switched on, so as to differentiate it from the regular headlights.
Yeah, that’d be great. You could call them “flashers” or “pointers” or something. Surprised that they haven’t thought of it before now.
Perhaps some have already come up with this idea. If so, I certainly I don’t see them being used!
Thanks for the advice about scratching and sniffing the manly bits. I tried that this morning.
Another thing that pisses me off - the email recipient that feels the need to get in that last word. Our email here at work allows for just one Out of Office reply to go out to a recipient, regardless of how many emails they send. I can’t tell you how many times I get email from CAPT Lastword that says, “Oh, I forgot you were out today. I guess I’ll ust see you in the office next Monday,” after receiving my out of office reply. It’s not like I sit there and type each one out individually!
By the same token, I’d like to complain about MAJ Noresponse, who will not get back to me via email because it’s too impersonal.
My counterpart and the assistant director at my school are both applying for EU training programs this summer. I’m helping them fill out the forms, because it’s all in English. The people who created these applications: my god, they are assholes. This is the most bullshit corporate nonsensical thing I have ever seen. Not to mention, they contain as many stupid empty conceptual words as possible, which is NOT HELPFUL for say, anyone whose English isn’t very good, or someone who might be trying to explain what these questions mean (and I use the word “mean” only in the loosest sense because some of these questions don’t appear to mean anything) in their crappy Bulgarian. I don’t know how to say “how will the training course diversify the educational opportunities in your community or institution” in Bulgarian!
Fuckers.
Their own front yard isn’t where the butts go, either. The fuckwit who lives down the street from me litters his own fucking front yard with butts, and they blow all over the neighborhood. Apparently this asshat has gotta smoke, but can’t stand the thought of stinking up his own precious house, so he goes outside and shits all over the neighborhood. What a douche. I’ve got to go bitch to my association.
Hey Whoopi, shut the hell up!
Here in Cincinnati, 94.1’s morning show has Whoopi Goldberg on it. It’s just another morning show: too much inane blather, not enough music. BUT, unlike other morning shows, or pretty much any other radio station I’ve ever heard, this one INTERRUPTS THE FUCKING SONGS! When I’m enjoying a song, I sure as hell don’t you busting into the middle of it. I’m listening to The Wallflowers, I like this song, and when you stop the fucking song to inform me that what I’m actually listening to is ‘Wakin up with Whoopi’, it’s bad. Let me finish the song, fer shit sake! You can babble about Lost or American Idol or some other stupid shit after the song. Song is playing: shut the hell up. No song is playing: feel free to work your noisehole. It’s not difficult. Don’t make me come down to the station and change your playlist manually.
Kayeby, Calgary is a semi-arid area, and we have droughts and water-rationing on a regular basis, which you think would mean that residents would understand them better, but there are always the assholes watering their grass for hours on end, in the middle of the scorching hot day, with water running down the gutter. Makes me want to go cut up their garden hose, let me tell you. For grass, no less. You know what happens if your grass goes yellow from lack of water? It greens up when the rain comes again. IT’S A MIRACLE!!!
Can you charge your tenants for their water usage, and make it high enough so they actually start to think about how they’re filling the bathtub with water every time the cat wants a drink? Calgary has been putting everyone on a water meter for a while now, and I think it’s going a long way to curbing this kind of thoughtless wastefulness.
hotflungwok, that would drive me out of my mind. I hate it when they just step on the end of a song.
I hate it when things disappear off the face of the earth! :mad: I know the Thing I’m Looking For used to exist, because I remember having it in my hand. I know it no longer exists, because I’ve looked all the places it could possibly be. Somehow, it has winked out of existence, and I hate when that happens.
Not True! It has rematerialized on the sidewalk in front of the grocery store; where I tripped over it, and sprained my ankle. I kicked it into the street, where it was quickly converted into a two dimensional parody of its former self.
iHate ethis ifucking eass ibullshit. iKnock eit ithe efuck ioff eit iis elame! iYour eproduct istill esucks, ino ematter iwhat eyou icall eit. eFuck iYou!
Aaaaand by-tor wins the thread! Comedy gold… 
The same thing happened to my TV remote. It has vanished from the material sphere!
(And all of us here are too cheap to go buy a $15 universal remote. Oh, and our DVDp layer just died, forcing us to use the PS2, which doesn’t have a remote, and since we pretty much just use the TV for DVDs, there isn’t much if a point to having a TV remote now anyway.)
To my neighbors:
Stop leaving the stairwell doors and windows in the apartment house corridor open every. damn, night. We’re supposed to be living in an enclosed apartment house and when I step out of my door into the hallway, it should still feel like “inside”.
If you want the outdoors when you open your apartment door, go move into a two story garden court.
Listen FX Channel. White Chicks wasn’t funny enough to play the *first *time. Now that you are on your 456 showing this week, it is *really really *sucking!
Dear best friend of many years’ standing,
[…Aw hell, I feel guilty starting off even a mini-rant that way. She’s my best friend! Isn’t this way too trivial and petty to complain about in a best friend? Shouldn’t I just rise above it?..Naw, the Pit is not the place for rising above things. Here goes.]
Thanks for all the news about what’s up with you, and thanks for asking for my news when I wrote back to congratulate you about all the cool stuff in your news! But did you notice that in the initial email I sent you that started this whole exchange, I mentioned that I just got a new job that I was really excited about, and you completely ignored that information? As in, no reference to it whatsoever in your subsequent emails talking about all your cool news and asking for news from me? Honeybitch, I already told you my big news and you apparently didn’t even notice it! Thanks for caring! :mad:
To the Health Insurance Company that partially covers us should we get hit by a train (except for any damage to the body part that was nixed as a condition of coverage):
Thank you so much for raising our rate by $110 a month exactly 3 weeks after we accepted your crappy coverage. You can stuff your pre-existing conditions lifetime exclusion rider, too.
:mad:
Sorry, people no longer actrually read emails. They just scan to get the gist of them, then fire off a note about themselves. It is the way of the world. They also can’t reply to Evites…
I sent 22 evites out for my sister’s shower (11 people didn’t have emails listed). We’ll see how many RSVPs I get (I requested them ASAP since the shower is less than three weeks away). Frankly, I don’t really care who shows up; they’re not MY friends and family. Well, some are my family, but the close ones are all coming.
30 days.
(I’d like to rant on behalf of my other sister - she is going to be spending over a thousand dollars on our other sister’s wedding! Holy flurking snit! That’s the point where I would say very politely, “I would love to attend your wedding, but I must regretfully decline any other participation.” This girl just doesn’t get what she’s asking of other people.)
Dear cockroach from last night,
Bet you thought that was pretty fucking funny flying right at me and crawling under my shirt, didn’t you, you piece of shit? Thought it was pretty haha making me chase you around, hosing down floor and furniture with bugspray. Well fuck you cocksucker, that’s why you went into the garbage disposal instead of the toilet, I didn’t want you to have the slightest chance of crawling out of a storm drain somewhere and attacking anyone else. When I pressed the switch, I think I heard you scream. Sweet dreams motherfucker.
Oh and fuck you too Raid, of the SC Johnson family of products, your bugspray fucking sucks. What’s that shit do, just give roaches a nice sheen, no more tears? Goddamn bug swam through a puddle of your insecticide like Andy Capp diving into a pool full of beer, must be nice to charge that much for shit that doesn’t fucking work. How hard is it to poison a bug? The tards down in your chemistry lab can’t tell you because they don’t fucking know how.