Which AIDS infected, Plague Carrying, Angst Filled, Suicidal Ugandan would you boink?

Okay… I’m tired of it. I think most of ya’ll are too. You know, you open up IMHO and see 5 threads like “Which AIDS infected, Plague Carrying, Angst Filled, Suicidal, Homicidal, Meglomanical Jewish Communist Madgascarite would you have sex with?” or “Light Bulb Sockets I’ve Loved.”

Sheesh. Ladies and Gentlemen, could we move on to another topic of polling? I mean, we’ve covered this in great, needless detail. I don’t care anymore that you have a fetish for Rogue or The Beast from the X Men.

Personally, I prefer my wife. She’s real. :smiley:

Well there goes the thread I was going to start on “Which US Supreme Court Justice would you most like to screw like a crazed weasel in heat?”…

(I’m also reminded of the creative writing class student from “Throw Momma from the Train” whose contribution was a list of women’s names titled “Women I Would Like to Pork” (“It’s a coffee table book”). :slight_smile:

I was going to start “Which short, guitar-playing medical student from Kentucky would you like to boink?”, but I won’t.

Dr. J

Well, I might have picked Clarence Thomas, but I don’t even like Coke!

So I think I’ll go with Sandra Day O’Connor. That sounds like a fun one to scream out. “Oh Connor! Oh Connor!”

Idi Amin…

Oh, you mean this wasn’t s real question? Nevermind… :smiley:

I’m a guy. No matter what I might have said in previous posts, or try to claim in the future, if she’s female, or appears to be female, or is a photo of a female, or a cartoon representation of a female, or a female figment of my imagination, I probably would.

“Rocket88, Tammy Faye Bakker on line one, Rocket88…”

**jr8 asked:

Which US Supreme Court Justice would you most like to screw like a crazed weasel in heat?**

Well, it’s a toss up between Thomas and Scalia, but only if your definition of screw is: to aim an over-sized, rusty, slightly bent whale harpoon that has been slathered in spoilt vaseline jelly which has been laced with the Top 10 most poisonous microbes (to humans) and thrust it into his anus that is being held open by the teeth of G. W. Bush and Fred Phelps.

I thought Idi Amin was dead, so wouldn’t you have to change the thread title to, “Which Dead AIDS infected, Plague Carrying, Angst Filled, Suicidal Ugandan would you boink?”

Also, um, somebody had sex with a light bulb socket?? Would that be in connection with the “Copious Amounts of Ejaculate” GQ thread?

No problem, but I draw the line on a threesome with RuPaul:

I bet if Ruth Bader Ginsberg takes those glasses off, and lets her hair down …

Hootchie Mama!

Saint Zero:

Excellent point. I prefer your wife, too.

Real good, Ender, one more time you have me bursting out laughing, hooting, chuckling and waking up the dog.

But I’m going for Rehnquist, Da Big Kahuna, the hunk of stone Mt. Rushmore never saw. There’s a certain necrophiliac allure there, y’know? Passionate love cries of “tort! tort!” if things got intense and he survived long enough. Imagining his satisfied, mule-eatin’-thistles grin up there on the portico, holding the Bible for Dubya.

Actually, as to the OP, the fight against ignorance leads us all down dark and twisted–very twisted–paths. Which leads me to wonder if even mentioning necrophilia was such a swell idea.

Veb

And this is why I love Saint Zero…

Freyr, it sounds like you don’t have any love for poor ol’ Fred Phelps. Any particular reason why, other than he’s as evil as they come? I live in the same town he does, and have picketed AGAINST him(even got mentioned in one of his faxes) He and his family even have their own little pet name for me. I’m “the church whore” because they have senn me attending two different churches, and, according to them, I “don’t know where I want to do my spiritual fornication”

So the answer must be “Two; the hard part is getting them into the lightbulb.”

Sorry: that should read:

So the answer to “How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” is actually “Two; the hard part is getting them into the lightbulb.”

I msut have deleted something betwixt Preview and Submit…

**Baker asked:

Freyr, it sounds like you don’t have any love for poor ol’ Fred Phelps. Any particular reason why, other than he’s as evil as they come?**

Oh, but I do love Fred Phelps. I’d love him even more if he were doused in gasoline and set afire by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. And I’d absolutely adore him if he were suddenly set upon by 100 clones of Quentin Crisp, each beating him with a tastefully matching handbag that contained a 15lb. lead brick. And I’d declare my love for him on the front page of the New York Times if everyone of his sons were caught sucking off truckers in each of the rest stops along I40.

And this is why I love Ukulele Ike…