Which outdated customs should go?

We also cannot keep our garbage cans/recycling bins visible from the street, except on pick-up day. No HOA.

@SanVito generally speaking if you can’t park your boat or RV in compliance with the rules, you would likely have to pay to park it in a private lot or vehicle storage facility for that purpose, there are usually a number of them around any major city. I have a coworker who can’t park his RV anywhere at home for this very reason, he pays over $100/mo to park it in a private facility.

As for what laws allow it, generally it’s what is called “Home Rule.” In a “home rule” state, local municipalities essentially are presumed to have authority to pass any laws they see fit as long as those laws do not directly violate the State Constitution or the U.S. Constitution. Saying you can’t park an RV in front of your house isn’t something that runs afoul of the State / U.S. Constitution, so if a city chooses to restrict it in a “home rule” state, they generally can do so.

It is the town council / city council of these municipalities that pass these laws, and generally speaking the % of the residents who are aware of the council’s activities is small. Usually turnout in municipal elections is very low (sometimes less than 20%), and it is usually older busy bodies that keep themselves acting in attending council meetings and raising the sort of “quality of life neighborhood complaints” that result in such ordinances being passed into law.

In Illinois (where kenobi_65 lives, if I’m not mistaken), it’s Illinois Complied Statue 5 which states in part:

(65 ILCS 5/) Illinois Municipal Code. Sec. 1-2-1. The corporate authorities of each municipality may pass all ordinances and make all rules and regulations proper or necessary, to carry into effect the powers granted to municipalities, with such fines or penalties as may be deemed proper.

Then a bunch of details about what’s appropriate, maximum fines and penalties, yadda yadda. So the towns derive their authority from the state.

I was in kindergarten in 1987-1988 and I distinctly remember having a graduation ceremony in the auditorium of the elementary school. I also remember as a little kid thinking it was so much fun!

I loved my kids’ kindergarten graduations. I got my daughter a bouquet of flowers, my son a heart-shaped box of chocolates.

Then again, I loved Kizzy’s recent commencement exercises from puppy class (high honors!).

Since tipping is so ingrained in American restaurants and the psyche of customers, I think the only way to fairly eliminate it is to mandate no-tipping across the board, for all eating establishments. Otherwise, customers will be more likely to gravitate toward restaurants with tipping and lower prices (many won’t factor in the cost of tips in their equation). This assumes non-tip restaurant owners will pay employees more (increase the minimum wage to something livable), and pass the cost to higher entree prices. I think slim profit margins for restaurants will assure that.

I was in kindergarten about 60 years ago. I have no idea whether or not we had a graduation. But let’s suppose that we did have one that I’ve totally forgotten: That is not a valid argument against them. The criteiria should not be my memories today, but of the impact it made on me back then.

(On a related note: We did have a graduation from elementary school. This was at the end of 6th grade, as 7th grade was in the Junior High School in another part of town. I don’t remember anything about the graduation except that we did have one. I do have clear memories of my high school and college graduations.)

I believe that there is a middle step between those points, and I see it in the restaurants who clearly state on the menu that a “service charge” of NN% will be added to all bills. Sometimes this really is for all customers, and sometimes it is only for groups of N people or more. Either way, I would love to see this situation evolve, such that at some point, they’ll simply increase each price by the stated amount, and begin a no-tipping policy.

Factor sales tax into the listed price of products and round to the nearest dollar. If I have $10 in my pocket, I’ll know I can buy something priced $10, and I won’t have a lot of change jingling in my pocket. Yeah, sure, most people use plastic these days, but that’s beside the point.

I’d like to get rid of the trite “thank you for your service” that gets trotted out whenever a member of the armed forces - active or retired - is identified. It always seems to lead to sort of an awkward pause. I get the impression that the person who receives the blessing doesn’t seem to know how to respond, and the genuflecting is just unnecessary.

There are companies that provide storage for such items. We have several in my area.


If the locals decide to vote for such local ordinances it’s legal.

That’s why, on voting days, a US ballot can go on for pages and pages - you’ve got the Federal candidates, the state, then the county, then local people, then you have various referendums and ordinances…


I don’t care for performative patriotism in general.

I do get very annoyed at the folks who festoon themselves with veteran paraphernalia and get bitchy if they are not constantly thanked for their service. Fortunately, that sort aren’t particularly common.

On Veteran’s Day, OK - it’s a day for remembering veterans after all.

I did (and still do, sometimes) get a bit of happy warm tickle the first time a former service member thanked me for my service (basically, continuing to do a job involving a lot of customer face-to-face and some risk because of it) during the pandemic. But I certainly don’t expect it as a matter of course.

But what will we replace it with?

I understand that it places the soldier/veteran/whatever in an awkward position, but I genuinely want to thank them for doing their part to defend me (regardless of how large or small that part might be). Especially as I am far too much of a chicken to volunteer for such service myself.

They are embarrassed to accept my thanks, but I’m embarrassed to be in their presence without acknowledging my debt. Anyone have ideas for a solution?

I guess my answer to the OP is broader than I originally stated, as I’d like to see the notion that we are indebted to the military go away. These people had a job and got paid for it. Good for them. Did it tangentially benefit my quality of life? Sure, but that’s also true of my mail carrier. I don’t feel embarrassed to be in her presence.

I don’t know that they’re embarrassed exactly - generally, when I’ve seen this it’s been at events like a baseball game where there are many uniformed service members in attendance. They don’t seem embarrassed so much as they seem to want to watch the game like a normal person, without a trip to the concession stand or rest room turning into a spectacle.

One of our veteran Dopers around here once posted something to the effect of “Wanna show your support for people serving their country? Elect people who won’t send us into dangerous and unnecessary situations, and care for us when we are done serving.”

Yes, they did get paid. But some did the paying themselves - with their lives, or with physical or mental injuries.

Yes, there are lots of dangerous jobs. But I see a clear line between a construction worker or physician on the one hand, and military or police on the other. These guys literally go into harm’s way for the public.

I totally get that. And it happens to all sorts of famous people too. I remember an interview in TV Guide many years ago, with Patrick Stewart of Star Trek. He said he was once in a restaurant, in India, I think it was. When the fruit cup appetizer arrived at their table, he and his date found a piece of melon at the top, sculpted in the shape of the starship Enterprise. He explained to the interviewer that this was a clear message: We know exactly who you are, and we are going to leave you alone about it. He said it was the classiest thing he’d ever seen in his life.

It’s so pervasive, it gets done in fiction without anyone noticing. I watched TNG Where Silence Has Lease. Riker and Worf go into the transporter room. “Lt” O’Brien is standing there waiting for them. He sends them on their way; later, her brings them back, apparently standing the whole time. When they leave, he’s still standing. There is no place in the transporter room to sit, no window, nothing to do but stand. And the transporter wasn’t used anymore in the episode (or probably for days afterwards). When Picard ordered the self-destruct, was O’Brien standing there the whole time, awaiting death in his tiny “closet” of a workspace, like a good worker drone? “Have a nice day, and thank you for stopping by!”

In Roddenberry’s vision of the future, humans have evolved past our primitive concepts of discomfort and varicose veins.

WAG-He has some sort of office/ready room nearby when not actively transporting.