At the top of my stepladders it says, “Do not stand or sit.” I break this rule all the time, because they haven’t left me any good options, dammit!
I tug on superman’s cape
I spit into the wind
I pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger
I mess around with Jim
Came here to post this.
The specific “instructions” would be the classic “No user-serviceable parts inside.” Screw that noise.
And you flout the rules of poetic scansion as well.
A true internet badass. 
Clothing has laundry instructions? Wow. Is it “breaking” them if you don’t know if what you’re doing is right or wrong?
Regarding my devices: phones, media players, etc. I own it, I install and run what I want on it. Rooting a device is a God given right.
Once in a while I will run a binary editor on some software to change some behavior I don’t like. Take that Big Software Company!
But for a while now I’ve only been installing licensed, paid for*, OSes on my computers. I must be getting old or something.
Needless to say, since I was a little kid I was taking the cover off electronics to fix/monkey around with them. Despite any stickers on the back.
- Well, not for my Linux, Android, etc. devices, of course.
I forgot about the other breakable post-donation rule: I DO enjoy alcoholic beverages later in the same day.
I pretty much ignore left turn red lights. Maybe someone can explain why I shouldn’t turn if the left turn light is red, but there’s nobody coming toward me, no pedestrians, and the traffic going my way has a green light
Dude… a red light is a red light. They’re non-negotiable.
So are most of the rules in this thread, other than the jokes — that’s kind of what “rule” means. The only difference is that I will likely get a very expensive ticket if caught. But I’ve been doing it for so long, like 50 years, that I’d say I’m well past the point where the time saved was worth it, if I ever do get a ticket.
Just to be clear, do you do this even if there is a car stopped in front of you?
I’m inclined to agree here, but they’ve won, they’ve beaten me. I worry that a hidden red light camera will flash when I do.
I eat dinner food for breakfast and have lunch at 4:00 PM.
I don’t cook steaks in a cast iron pan.
I bring a sword to gun fights.
I don’t drive defensively. At this point, on my frequently traveled state highway, I am just driving scared.
Screw-you highschool driving instructor, you never mentioned this sorta shit.
A few years ago, I bought a bottle of rust remover at Walmart. I had no intention of reading the instructions. I was all set to squirt it into my toilet to get the rust stains out, when I noticed this admonition on the bottle: “Do not use this product if you do not intend to follow the instructions.”
Whoa. That stopped me in my tracks! Well played, instructions. Well played.
I sometimes sneak food into the movie theatre since they have few healthy options.
I am not supposed to bring cans of diet pop to the gym since it is “unsealed”.
I sometimes store things in places which are not cool and dry.
I try to convinced my dogs the bag of Cheetos say in plain English " not for non-human consumption" , they don’t believe it.
It’s a Saturn. But I once had a rental car that had this, also–not just a light, but a little ding to go with it. Now let me say that I was visiting San Francisco at the time. I’m pretty sure they asked me if I could drive a stick. What they should have asked me is more like, “Are there HILLS where you live?” So yeah, I’m sure the car wanted me to go up that hill in at least second gear if not high. But no. Maybe if I’d been there more than 3 days.
Once I figure out the one on my Saturn was just recommending something and not indicating my car was on fire, I was successfully able to ignore it for years on end.
I don’t care if they may be mothers, I ain’t never nice to web footed friends.
I pick up cardboard boxes by the elongated holes on the sides. The ones which say “not to be used as handles.” I’m really edgy that way.
Yep, just as I suspected - some real bad asses here!
- I go in the exit doors at the supermarket
- I tell everyone what happened in Vegas
I give my dog chocolate. Not a ton mind you but she loves it so.
I often don’t wash my hands after I pee unless some splatters on me.
I put my fingers in my ears all the time and sometimes get rewarded with a nice juicy gob of wax.
I’ll take 20 items in the 15 items or less express lane.
I ignore a don’t walk signal if I can dodge the traffic.
I’ll jaywalk with abandon.