I don’t know if this is Ireland-specific or not: Google makes me think it’s some widespread phenomenon but I’ve never heard of it.
Since I’ve arrived in Ireland, every time I’ve gone to buy a cup of coffee (something it’s infuriatingly hard to do: why can’t your convienence stores have pots of it going like they do in civilized places?) I’ve been asked if I want it “black or white”. I’m assuming that this means “Do you want creamer in it, or are you one of those good people who drinks coffee the way god intended you to, strong and black?” Half the time, though, it doesn’t seem to matter beacuse either I get handed little things of creamer anyway, or it’s self-serve.
So, what, exactly, are they asking me with that question? Is it a regional thing, or just something I’ve somehow been unaware of in the past?
They’re asking you if you want your coffee black, or with milk. Despite the chemical-sludge creamer things that you get in fast food places, it’s usually milk that’s added to coffee in the UK rather than cream.
(The country of) Ireland isn’t part of the UK, but otherwise Zuzu’s Petals is/are correct: “black” means without milk, and “white” means with milk - not creamer, which is rarely found. Although a Starbucks opened in Dame Street recently, ordering a coffee is generally a lot simpler than over the Atlantic.
Oh, I see. Yeah, that’s my question too, I suppose. Habit, I guess. Coffee drinking is only just becoming very common, and even now it’s not unusual to find a household with no coffee in it at all, or just half a congealed jar of Nescafé at the back of a cupboard. Before coffee started appearing regularly, everyone drank tea at home, almost always with milk.
So, my theory is that the waitron knows the custom is to ask: “white or black?” but their subconscious thought is: “the only way any sane human being would drink [this hot drink] is with milk”.
As a black coffee drinker I definitely find the default is white. It’s fine in places where I’m buying coffee, but in people’s homes I frequently get given white coffee, either because I forgot or didn’t have a chance to ask for black (and lots of people will put in milk without asking) or because I told them I wanted it black but they put the milk in from force of habit.
Yup - I make a point of always ordering black coffee, to (a) get the right thing, and (b) not have them fill it two-thirds full so I can dilute it with cow-juice.
It’s interesting that although plenty of people can and do buy half-decent coffee on the high street, they don’t opt for it at home. I’ll own up to being a guilty party - while I adore coffee, it’s tea which is never in short supply at home.
It’s hardly something the chavs are going to be stealing. Why the hell can’t we cope with decent portions of properly-stimulating coffee without having someone ‘prepare’ it for us?
Actually, in Ireland’s defense, pots of coffee go manky within about 20 minutes of being made. American convenience store coffee is weak as piss and tastes like burnt arse. Having one prepared freshly, even by a dimwit, is preferable to drinking something that in a nation where not many people drink it, would probably have been stewing there for two or three hours.
because the number of whinging caffeine addicts in Ireland is probably not at the critical level needed to support the overbrewed bitter paint stripper trade
I heartily object to this. In my experience in the Philadelphia metro area, the Wawa chain of convienance stores has good coffee. Weak, yes, but then again I speak as someone who thinks that if it does not immediately begin to erode the metal spoon used to stir it, the coffee is not strong enough.
In the absence of a smiley, I’ll answer your question seriously.
He wants a white coffee. He wants the person to make it black, and then add some milk, which results in a white coffee. He asks for “black with milk” because he likes confusing people. He only did it, to my knowledge, with new work colleagues, and always with a big grin hidden behind a deadpan face.
His standard response to “sugar?”, was, “no thanks, I’m sweet enough already.”
I guess it’s similar to asking a hamburger shop for a bacon and egg burger with no beetroot.
“We don’t have beetroot sir”
“Ok, could you make it without onion then?”
“ok… ???”
