In an otherwise unrelated thread, someone wrote
(link added by moi)
Leaving aside the illogic of the final insult (shouldn’t it be unfuck that guy? ), I think we have a subject for a thread – obviously this one. It’s been a while since I started any bloodthirsty and immoral discussions, after all.
So here’s the sitch. I’m donating the use of my Burroughs-Libby cross-time buggy. The verniers are locked so that you can only go backwards in time; the minimum trip allowed is 150 years, and the maximum is 1900 years: in other words, you can go to any date between 111 CE and 1860 CE.* The Novikov compensator is engaged so that your actions on the trip can actually be of effect.‡ The CT buggy has a Star Trek:TNG era library computer and sensor array installed, so you should be able to find anybody you want. There’s also a light saber for, well, killing people,† and a Legion flight ring to effect a quick getaway back to the buggy.
You may make a single trip backwards in time, and then return. Whom will you assassinate for the good of man-the-kind?
*Why, yes, this is set up so you can’t kill Dick Cheney OR Jesus Christ. Why? The latter because we dump on the Christians too much as it is, and the former because I don’t want to be wishing death on living people.
‡ I will fear no paradox.
† Why a light saber rather than a phaser, AK-47, or sniper rifle? Because if you’re going to get all murdery, you should have the balls and/or ovaries to do it face to face.