Nerds or Geeks ? I can’t tell them apart. Are pocket protectors really that useful ? Also, how do any of either category ever get laid ? How do these people reproduce ? And why ? I hope not to have offended anybody. I was hoping to offend everybody equally. I’m fair-minded.
We are discussing this right now over at the secret smart message board.
Understood. Remember to use coasters. Don’t you hate those ring-marks ? I know I do.
Coasters-That’s funny!
I keep forgetting that you folk don’t have access to hoverglasses.
Hoverglasses. Ha! I remember when we used to use those.
Look, you convinced me that you could make those martinis evaporate just by looking at them, but you have yet to prove that you are actually getting drunk on them, walking on the ceiling notwithstanding.
Nerds are scholastically inclined and geeks are fanatics about all things Sci Fi or Fantasy.
Yeah-what the nerd said.
I think “nerds” are smarter, and I’m not just saying that because I am one. 
“Geeks” are people who are passionate about a special interest. It is not enough to read comic books. No, they must also dress like comic characters and play role-playing games centered on them and belong to a fan club. A geek interest doesn’t require intellectual rigor. You can geek out on anything without being a technical expert in it.
A nerd is someone who knows a lot about a field of study. Passion is not required to join their ranks, but breadth of knowledge is. A nerd can be entertained by their interests, but they seek understanding before entertainment. Nerds are concrete with their creativity. They don’t revel in fantasy or make-believe when it comes to their areas of specialization.
I’m half man, half nerd and half geek, and I take offence at the idea that any of my parts are incapable of getting laid. On the other hand, each of my parts are equally offended, so at least your equal-opportunities offence scatter-gun is on the mark.
As with Klingons, there are also lady nerds and geeks. You just can’t always tell right away.
Nerds, of course. Geeks are just waaaaay to into uncool things, by definition. Nerds have to know stuff to earn the title.
Knowing stuff is what gets me laid. First they’re wooed by my ability to hold a conversation and then later…overwhelmed…by my knowledge of anatomy and physiology. 
Um, did you just travel here from 1985? If so, welcome to the future. The nerds and geeks have won. Yes, it’s Bizarro World over here. Every single thing you own is run by a computer. The richest men on the planet are nerds. Nerds and geeks are the cool crowd now. I mean, what are hipsters, if not just wannabe geeks?
Trust me, the problems with getting laid are all in the past. Nerds and geeks are the ones getting all the ladies now, while the jocks are the ones living in their parents’ basements, unemployed, desperate to have someone, anyone, touch their penises.
Jeez, get with the program, already.
As a vintage nerd, I assure you that we nerds are able to reproduce. My wife is non nerdy, but didn’t let my neediness as a teenager get in the way of our nearly lifetime relationship. I do have two very successful nerdy sons to show the ability of nerds to find mates and reproduce.
I will say that nerds have it a lot easier now than in the 50’s and 60’s when I was a young man - most of us were in the closet, but a few brave souls did wear their slide rules on their belts.
Geeks were originally side show folks who did weird things like biting the heads off chickens. Nerds were the seriously academic ones who didn’t play sports for the most part.
Who wants to know?
I disagree. With math and computer programming having become high-demand skills, now more than ever there is a need for people with nerd-bullying experience. Project and management, sales, marketing, business development. All these roles require nerd-bashing skills in order to harness the obsessive / compulsive power of a socially awkward twenty-something kid with Asperger’s to crank out code for 36 hours straight.
Seriously, Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg are among the richest people in the world and people still refer to them as giant geeks. Money doesn’t buy cool.
That’s strange, I’ve always thought the definitions were the opposite, i.e. that geeks sought understanding and mastered a subject while nerds were the awkward fan club types with bad social skills. Hence the terms “comic book nerd,” “band nerd,” “Star Wars/Trek nerd”, which bring up negative connotations of awkward, socially inept people collecting action figures in their mother’s basement. A geek is more of a techie who would rather stay up all night programming than go out with friends because they’d enjoy it. A nerd would stay up reading comic books because they have no friends.
Wikipedia has pages for both but the geek page is pretty short. The nerd page is a lot longer (probably written by a damn nerd) and lists stereotypical nerd traits:
*Nerds can either be described by their hobbies and interests, or by abstract qualities such as personality, status, social skills, and physical appearance.
“Nerdy” interests
Some interests and activities that are likely to be described as nerdy are:
Intellectual, academic, or technical hobbies, activities, and pursuits, especially topics related to science, mathematics, engineering, linguistics, history and technology. (See below)
Hobbies, games, and activities that are described as obsessive and "immature", such as trading cards, comic books, fantasy and science fiction novels, television programs and films, role-playing games, tabletop games, and video games. (See below)
Interest in the fine arts, non-mainstream music such as classical, techno, or folk music, hobbies (i.e., collecting), or other "obscure" interests.
Heavy obsession with a topic that would otherwise be mainstream (such as a popular TV show or a sport).
“Weird Al” Yankovic’s song “White and Nerdy” states many other stereotypical nerd interests, including the Segway, ten-pin bowling, A.V. Club, the Renaissance Fair, editing Wikipedia, and Dungeons and Dragons. [17]
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Stereotypical nerds are commonly seen as intelligent but socially and physically awkward.[18] They would typically be perceived as either lacking confidence or being indifferent or oblivious to the negative perceptions held of them by others, with the result that they become frequent objects of scorn, ridicule, bullying, and social isolation. However, many nerds may eventually find a group of similar people to associate with.[19]
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Stereotypical “nerd” appearance includes very large glasses, braces, severe acne and pants highly lifted up. In the media, many nerds are white males, portrayed as being physically unfit, either overweight or very thin.*
That’s what I thought too. Urkel and the comic book guy from the Simpsons are stereotypical nerds.
Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: [gasps] Ahhh! You’re that NERD!
Lewis: Yeah.
Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: [blissfully] Oh, you were wonderful.
[gasps in ecstacy]
Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: Are all nerds as good as you?
Lewis: Yes.
Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: How come?
Lewis: 'Cause all Jocks ever think about is sports, all we ever think about is sex.
1985 ? Geez, I wish. I already had two kids by then. I’m from the ancient past, 1952, Ano Domini. We had tv and other cool stuff ( 3 channels !). I agree the richest men on Earth are nerds, these days. I mean, Bill Gates ? His nerdiness is off-the-charts.
Lots of funny responses. My complements, all. And the guy, here, with more than one penis. Well, no wonder we can’t compete for the, you know, honey. Good to know humor is a part of your advanced thinking. In my day, chicks dug hair. That was about it. It was a much simpler time, and harrier; for both genders. Nowadays, beavers are naked, or so I’m informed. Much sleeker, less wind-drag, cooties, etc. It’s a brave new world. Why can’t I die ?