Who's the jerk, him or me?

In My Humble Opinion
1

I just received an unsolicited e-mail with attached resume from a fellow alum of my grad school (different years, different department, completely unknown to me) looking for a job.

The first line of his e-mail says: “I found your name from the [school] alumni database. I am writing to see if there are any career opportunities with your practice.”

The Alumni database where I believe he obtained my e-mail address clearly states (in part) that:

“Privacy Assurance: The information contained herein is only to be used for university business and for individual communication of a personal nature between members listed herein. Use of this data for any other purpose … is strictly prohibited. [School] can and will deny access to any member of the community who misuses the information contained herein.”
[Emphasis mine.]

I wrote an e-mail in response saying, politely as I could, that I didn’t appreciate the solicitation and I thought he was in violation of the privacy policy. But I haven’t sent it yet. (I’ll post the full text if anyone’s interested.)

Question #1: Who’s the jerk, him or me?

Am I going overboard given that it?s only one e-mail and the guy does need a job?

But then again, this privacy issue is a thing with me (yeah, yeah, I know it?s only an illusion, and I don?t really have anything to hide, but still?), and there?s the whole ?not playing by the rules/trying to get away with something? principle as well.

Question #2: If it’s him and not me, should I copy the e-mail reply to the school group that maintains the database and enforces the policy or should I just let it go?

What’s your vote:

:eek: :rolleyes: :wally: or :smack: ?

Guidance from you good people needed please!

2

I’d let it go. He didn’t mean any harm and it really is pretty harmless.

However, the school seems to be pretty free with giving up email addys that are supposed to be private. It wouldn’t hurt to let them know you’re not happy.

3

I vote that touching base with you in order to sniff out potential job opportunities falls under “individual communication of a personal nature”. He’s not trying to sell you anything. As you suspect, it’s only one e-mail and the guy does need a job. Probably pretty badly, too, to resort to such behavior.

If you’re concerned about privacy issues there are plenty of better targets to vent against than some guy with a fancy degree who found himself looking down the barrel of poverty.

There’s no “jerk” here - but that thing with your apostrophes looking like question marks kinda bugs me.

4

Him. Not only did he violate the privacy policy (cough SPAM cough), but one of the basic rules of netiquette is never to send unsolicited attachments.

Up to you to decide whether to let the school know. If it were me, I would. Who knows how many other people he’s SPAMMED?

Just because the guy needs a job doesn’t give him license to SPAM people. There are plenty of legitimate job search methods. Mr. S is in need of a job also, but he isn’t going around SPAMMING people.

Scarlett, queen of subliminal messages

5

It doesn’t seem like that big of a deal to me, i’d just let it drop. Maybe the guy is really desperate for a job. I definitely would not bother to forward it to the university. Its just one email. Granted, it was technically in violation of the privacy policy, but who cares?

6

Hmm, interesting question. The fellow seems to be in violation of the spirit of the alumni database, if not exactly the letter, but what harm has he done to you by it? When you are looking for work, you are advised by job search people to use every avenue available to you (coughNETWORKINGcough). But as you stated, privacy is a big deal to you. I would suggest sending an email to this fellow asking him to not send you anything in the future, as you consider your email address private. If he sends you anything further, take it to the database people.

7

I don’t think it’s a big deal.

8

My understanding of networking is that you start with people you know, and they give you contacts, and those people give you contacts, and so on. It’s not contacting unknown people cold, out of the blue, based on a tenuous connection. (Was it in Gung Ho where Michael Keaton was shopping for jobs on the phone: “Hi, remember me? Your brother and I were in kindergarten together. . . .”)

“Every avenue available” could also be construed to mean putting out flyers under windshield wipers down at the mall, but I wouldn’t say that’s a particularly effective method. And like wireless’s dude, it doesn’t speak well of the person either.

Many of the spams I get are “only one e-mail.” And these people are just trying to make a living, right? Wrong . . .

I also occasionally get unsolicited snail mail and e-mail from people who want me to hire them. Trouble is, if they’d done their homework they’d know that I’m a one-person operation. BZZZZZT! Sorry, if you can’t show me that you’re resourceful AND considerate, why would I want to hire you (even if I did ever hire people, which I don’t)?

To each his or her own, and so far it appears that I have the minority opinion. But IMHO, this guy showed extremely poor judgment.

9

I don’t think the guy did anything wrong. I certainly don’t think it’s spamming. If he’s specifically interested in your company, then he just used the fact that you went to a common school as a way to try to talk to someone who works there and possibly distinguish himself from the masses going through HR.

To me, right to privacy doesn’t mean that no one should be allowed to call/email me without obtaining my permission first. It means that organizations (banks, universities, companies, etc.) should not be allowed to ask for my phone number/email address as a condition of doing business with them, and then turn around and sell it to an advertiser. Big difference, in my opinion.

That all said, I think this guy’s approach is both unlikely to work and likely to make him look bad. I’d just delete the message and forget about it. If he writes you again, respond pointedly.

10

I don’t think it’s much of a big deal either. You can just ignore/delete the one email.

Since you don’t like the school giving out your address, then you should contact them with your complaint.

Nobody is a jerk here.

11

He went about it the wrong way. He should’ve started out by just touching base with a fellow alum, and asked how you liked working where you do. Then maybe after a few online exchanges, he could’ve said, ‘Well, if anything ever opens up at the Acme Practice, give me a heads up. Thanks.’

To just send his resume and ask you to hook him up is a little presumptuous and out of line.

Vote: he’s the jerk.

Happy, 2 cents poorer

12

Upon thinking it over after I hit ‘Submit reply,’ I wouldn’t say he’s so much a jerk as just maybe a bit naive to how things work in the business world.

He definitely needs to work on his networking skills.

Happy

13

I don’t think either of you has crossed the jerk line.

He’s looking for a job and could probably use a little slack, if you’re inclined to cut him some. Reply honestly as to the availability for employment at your firm and describe to him the appropriate manner of pursuit. Be businesslike but polite. What goes around has a wicked habit of coming around.

14

WRT your unsent email…
It is perfectly reasonable for you to send him an email indicating that you do not appreciate unsolicited correspondence from strangers. I think that submitting this same email to authorities for the purposes of punishing his indiscretion verges on vindictiveness and would probably push you over the “jerk line.”

Now, my emotional gut-response as a nearly graduated college student quite familiar with how freaking hard it is to get work right now…
As someone pointed out already, this guy is probably getting desperate to attempt such unorthodox job-seeking practices. Desperation can make a jerk out of even the most decent people. How violated do you feel, really? Could you see your way to firmly rebuffing his email while at the same time directing him to the appropriate HR outlets in your firm? You should probably advise him that this action has put your back up and will likely produce a similar effect in other potential employers-- that will make him rethink his stategies. Take pity on a poor student!
:rolleyes: <innocent look>

15

I don’t think you’re being a jerk at all, and I think he’s only being mildly annoying and kinda stupid. I mean, is spamming people for jobs is not the best way to make a good impression with a possible employer (although maybe he figures 99 out of 100 will tell him to take a hike, but he only needs one job). Send the letter, but keep it polite.

I would tell the alumni service about it, though. This is on the borderline of mis-use in my mind (had you two known each other in school, however, I wouldn’t think this), but if he’s been sending the request to lots of people, then it’s a definite violation. Let them know to be on the watch for abuse.

16

You mention in your first paragraph that you know when he graduated and his department, and then later state that his first line was “X”.

What was the rest of the message? Could it possibly be described as a personal communication? Did it look like he put effort into making it personalized and not, as Scarlett described, spam?

I vote “mountain out of a molehill.” I know that my alumni network is pretty deep throughout the country, and that people have a very good success rate of contacting the local alumni club/network. I know that I’d go the extra mile to help a fellow alum out if someone tried to contact me. In fact, I’d encourage local alumni to contact me if I were in any sort of position where I could help them out.

Send him an e-mail letting him know what the hiring situation is, how to follow-up on it, and your predictions for your football team this fall. Anything less, and I’d suggest you pull your name from the database.

17

If he were in insurance and used the database to find prospective clients, he’d be the jerk, right?
Same thing, the only difference is a matter of degree, IMHO.

I think he’s the one being a jerk. Well, not a jerk, just a…a tug?[sub]like a jerk, only less so.[/sub]

18

We might be overlooking one possible contender in the race for jerkiness, which is the school alumni office. In order to convince alumni, especially recent alumni, to stay involved with the school, they will sometimes try to sell people on the many networking/career benefits of being involved with one’s alumni association. If that is in fact the case, I think it’s easy to see why this person got the impression that using the alumni directory was a valid way of “networking.”

I agree that this isn’t a huge deal, and that this guy is more clueless than jerky. Personally, I would ignore it, or (if I were a more motivated person) contact the school’s alumni office and find out what they think about it. If they seem to think it’s kosher, then request that your email address not be published in the database.

If you did decide to inquire with the school, I would present it in a very neutral way – if you are obviously angry, the response will probably be to calm you, and you won’t get a real sense of what they would say if you had called and said “wouldn’t it be a great idea to email people about jobs!”

19

FYI - Just to address a few comments, fill in a few gaps, and let you know the outcome. (Yeah, everyone’s just dying to know!)

The school we both went to is a decently-sized U with many professional graduates over the years. We were both in (different) grad programs at different times. The “networking” connection is tenuous at best. The “personal” connection is nil. This and the fact that it’s a job solicitation put the e-mail into the non-personal communcation category, IMO.

This fellow was a high-ish level professional with a significant amount of job experience, not a recent grad. That puts him in the “should have known better” category, IMO.

The reason he targeted me with his e-mail is, I believe, because my alumni profile states my title as “President & CEO”. While this is true, it doesn’t indicate that the company is SMALL. My assumption was that others in a similar situtation (title) were also targeted as the only personalization of the e-mail was the salutation: “Dear [wireless]-” The rest was standard boilerplate. Thus not likely an “individual” communication, either (i.e. verging into SPAM territory).

As my company is small, I AM the HR department (and a million others to boot), so nowhere else to direct this guy. So, in one sense, he did get to the right person, just not in the right way. As giraffe said: “this guy’s approach is both unlikely to work and likely to make him look bad.”

And lastly, yes, this is one molehill that really doesn’t deserve to get any bigger. On further reflection, I wouldn’t characterize his action as “jerkish”, just “impolite” and “misguided” (and, as stated, ineffective and perhaps counter-productive). So I’ve decided to reply about “opportunities” AND to tell him - politely, of course - what I thought of the solicitation, but NOT tell the U unless it happens again (not likely).

Here’s what I wrote:

20

On (re-)re-reading my reply (above), I thought that it still might be open to interpretation, so I opened my corporate e-mail intending to send a follow-up e-mail stating that I wanted to be sure that my reply was understood as intending to be “guidance” not “rebuke”.

What do I find? A reply from him calling me “nasty” and claiming I “threatened” him with having his access to the database denied. (Gee, didn’t realize I had such powers!) So much for people getting (or giving) the benefit of the doubt!

I won’t bore you with MY (further) reply. It was (I hope! Damn this non-verbal communication!) factual, tempered and polite yet dismissive.

Somehow I think this guy may be looking for a job for a LOOOOOOONG time.