Both, repeatedly. Same goes for money or anything else kept in pockets.
I misread the thread title as “Whose job is it to check pockets for Chopsticks when doing laundry?” and wondered why anyone would leave chopsticks in their clothes and if they would really cause any problems in the washer or dryer.
Why do you have separate laundy baskets if your wife usually does the washing all together?
Seems like an extra unnecesary job for her to have to empty two laundry baskets which are going to the same place. If you had one for darks and one for whites, that might make more sense if she separates the washing that way. Some people do and some people don’t, of course.
Anyway, I think it’s the wearer’s responsibility to empty his or her pockets before any dirty washing gets chucked into the launtry basket. Whatever is in my pocket is my stuff, so it’s up to me to look after it. Do you throw your dirty trousers into the laundry basket with your phone or keys or wallet still in the pockets? If you can manage to take them out, why is a chapstick any different?
How about my situation? I don’t WANT MY laundry done by the SO. She is the one that insists on doing it much to my chagrin. I have many pockets and often crapp in them (usually tissue for sinus issues). She insists on doing it but isnt dilligent on final checking. So, whose fault is that when everything is covered in tissue fibers?
When I do MY laundry I generally empty. Then I check again when it gets loaded.
I’d say if you ASSUME it will be emptied or ASSUME it has already been emptied you are the one thats done it wrong. And I’d say most people do not put stuff in the laundry without emptying on purpose. They either forgot or missed something. Therefore, the person who doesn’t double check is the one most likely to be dropping the ball here.
That or the person with the penis is in the right.
I have a question for Cubsfan: why do you wait until laundry time to check your pockets? Why not empty them when you toss 'em and have your Chapstick at the ready the next time you get dressed? Don’t you want all your pocket stuff from one day to the next?
Also, I vote both: empty your pockets and laundry person re-checks. I also keep all money, but give the kids a pass if it’s a big bill. After I torture them about it, of course. 
I’m getting a feeling that the people who say two checks should be done are in households with kids. In the 11 years or so that I’ve been doing laundry for my husband and me, I can count on the fingers of one hand the times that anything has gone through the laundry without a check by the launderer (I never check - pockets are emptied before they go in the laundry bin). I’m not sure if we’ve ever had any damage from anything left in the pockets.
Where I get tripped up is that in the OP it sounds as if his wife is grabbing things (perhaps to complete a load, better for the environment than more small loads so yay her…)that he hasn’t yet identified as “in the wash”.
I often wear pants more than once between launderings. Pants on a hook or over the back of my dressing table chair may have lip balm, change, tissues, and all sorts of small hardware that gets in them at my job.
I consider it MY responsibility to check the pockets before adding them to a hamper of laundry. However, if my husband were overcome with an urge to throw in a load and grabbed a pair it fell to him to check.
If the pants were being put into a hamper or laundry basket with stuff in the pockets then the launderer would have a legitimate gripe.
That seems to be what is happening. The clothes are in “his” hamper. Hampered clothes should be laundry-ready.
Here’s another description of how I feel about it.
Lets say wearie leaves something in the pants pocket that should not be washed. Said item is not double checked at wash time and is ruined. IMO wearie has no cause for complaint.
OTOH, lets say washie forgets to double check at wash time and ruins something they care about or make a big mess they are the ones that generally clean up. IMO washie has nothing to complain about.
My rule is you double check and if you don’t do your part you have no complaint.
I voted for the launderer. Two reasons:
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My situation is similar to that of billfish678. I put my clothes in the hamper without checking all the pockets. I check them before I put them in the washing machine. My wife has told me she doesn’t check pockets before she puts clothes in the machine. I told her, fine, then don’t touch my dirty clothes, I like to do my own laundry anyway. She has this weird habit of separating clothes by type / colour, when anyone knows that you just throw everything in the machine together and wash on normal / warm.
This was before we had kids. -
Now that we have kids (two young boys), I tell her that she’s just asking for trouble if she doesn’t check the pockets before she puts stuff in the machine. When I do the boys’ laundry, I check the pockets. She usually doesn’t. Good thing that Lego pieces survive a wash and dryer cycle with no damage.
In a combined laundry situation is would be better for the wearer to check their pockets, as this is courtesy for the one doing the laundry. Though, in come cases, the launderer may just want to check anyway, and if that’s the case then a person can get away with not emptying them while maintaining a good relationship.
But in the OP’s case, with the clarification, it would fall totally on the launderer. Here there are 2 separate baskets for each person. Each person can decide the rules on their basket. If a person likes to empty their pockets as they load the washer that is fine. If the other person takes articles out of the basket to complete their load and they know the rules of the basket, it is incumbent on them to check the pockets. In this case there is no justification for the launderer to not checking the pockets, as you are not just risking your own clothes but the other persons. The launderer can chose not to wash the clothes, but when they decide to wash them and are aware that the pockets are not yet checked in this basket they better be checking pockets.
I can tell you’ve never lived in Japan, people are always forgetting their chopsticks in their pockets.
If you’ve asked her to not do something (reasonably), and she does it, then it’s her fault. Like someone said upstream, if the clothes are starting to stink, then it’s a different story, but this doesn’t seem to be the case.
And kids older than toddlers. We’re not to the checking their pockets stage.
Another aspect occurred to me.
When one sheds their clothes its usually under less than ideal circumstances regarding remembering to removing crap in your pocket. End of a long day. After doing some hot nasty dirty job. In a rush to change clothes and go back out. Spur of the moment sex. That kind of thing
In those circumstances the fact that these clothes will eventually be laundered are often not at the top of ones thought process. If one is doing any thinking at all.
OTOH, when you are grabbing clothes to throw them in the washer, the fact they are going to shortly be washed should be blindingly obvious and a reminder that it is so, and certainly not a distraction from the fact that shit needs to come out.
Therefore, if I had to choose only ONE check point for the pockets I would argue that right before they get thrown in the washer makes the most sense from a logical process point of view.
But I still maintain you should strive to empty in the first place and double check before the actual wash.
People are way to focused on my personal situation here but I’ll add another fact that may help. We have separate hampers in separate closets on opposite sides of the room. In order to get my pants she has to open my closet door and grab my hamper.
As far as why I don’t empty my pockets before putting my pants in the hamper I guess I just don’t. It’s as simple as that. I’m 35 and have cleared all pocketry when putting clothes in the washer my whole life. Which is part of the reason we wash our clothes separately.
Not looking for advice on whether I should or shouldn’t empty my pockets. Just wondering what the norm is elsewhere in the world. Clearly I’m the mutant.
If the laundry includes the clothing of small children, then it’s the responsibility of the launderer to check pockets for any loose Legos or homework or frogs (live or dead). And also to check the clothing for stains or anything that needs special treatment.
However, adults are presumably competent to remove everything from their pockets, and to remove jewelry and such, before putting stuff in a hamper. If you haven’t cleared the items for the washer/dryer, then don’t put them in the hamper.
In your most recent post, you said:
In your OP, you said:
I guess I’m alwo in the “both” camp…an adult should always empty pockets before the article of clothing goes in the laundry. But there are reasons why that might still fail. One instance is when a pocket gets used which isn’t normally used. You might do something out of the ordinary, like stick a pen in your shirt pocket, or a tube of chapstick in the little fifth pocket in a pair of jeans. If that’s not normal procdure, it may escape the mindless, automatic pocket check when stripping down. Making a somewhat redundant check a part of loading the washer is more likely to catch things. That’s because the washer is focused at that point on finding foreign objects, because it’s part of a deliberate task.
I feel stronger than most in this thread that a pocket check is absolutely a part of the task known as “doing laundry”. If you choose not to do it, you’re not doing the job properly. Assuming other people are doing their job (and thus doing yours for you) is never a good policy.
If you’re part of a crew working on a house, assuming someone else turned off the breaker is no substitute for checking yourself before rewiring the outlet. In that case, if you get shocked it’s your own damn fault, despite the other person’s negligence. Similarly, if you take someone’s word that the gun is empty, rather than personally checking for a chambered round, you can only blame yourself when you shoot your foot off.
The world is full of such examples. The fact is, if you’re performing a task, doing it right (and completely) often involves redunancies that are also someone else’s responsibility. That doesn’t make them any less your responsibility.
Just by his post I can tell Aerodave does stuff that can kill you if done wrong (like fly planes perhaps ? 
). People like him usually have a pretty well thought out process for how to do things with the least likelyhood of screwing up, an in particular accounting for the imperfections of human beings.
Not really contradictory if they do laundry together and he clears his pockets at that time.
We tried many methods of laundry to reduce household annoyances and finally ended on everyone does their own but we did have a period where we tried group laundry time. That was not what you’d call a success for us.
You give me way too much credit. But it’s true that I tend to be a pessimist (realist?) when it comes to depending on others’ competence.