Volume displacement. Which, curiously enough, I’ve noted several hotels with deeper bathtubs than most homes…
You’ve got to drown the hookers somewhere before you put them under the bed.
Where do all you people travel — with or without your dead hookers? Just about every hotel I’ve ever stayed in in the US had beds that were uncomfortably low for me. In Europe it’s been most but not all.
I’ve seen tall beds, low beds, average-height beds, platforms, frames and four-posters variously at hotels and motels across the US and elsewhere. So I cannot say one or the other is more common.
Well, despite what you see in the movies, dead hookers come in all shapes and sizes. The world of post-mortem prostitution is a diverse and beautiful one.
That didn’t sound right.
Hookers come in different sizes.
High beds, low beds, hanging beds; with and without hookers beneath. Nobody mentioned Murphy beds yet. Till now.
Note that the dead hooker would be immediately discovered once housekeeping lifts it up and therefore the last occupant (you) would be quickly implicated. This is the proximal cause for the declining popularity of Murphy beds, no doubt.
Also note that measuring the volume of a dead hooker in a bathtub would be a problem in the case of a large dead hooker and/or a small bathtub. Some, umm, separation of parts of said dead hooker may be needed to sum up the total volume. This would add to the mess and time. I suggest using the online Internet Dead Hooker Volume Estimator (idhve.com) instead. You would also save on having to transport calibrated buckets.
Of course, you could have not killed the hooker in the first place if you want to get pedantic.
Y’know, guys, maybe I’m just an old fashioned dude, decrying the coarsening of modern life, but IMO that a gentleman will return his sex worker alive and paid at the end of the transaction is the expected standard.
Of course, but accidents do happen and you must be prepared to act. Just last week I narrowly avoided choking a hooker to death, but when I bent over to check underneath the bed for available space she was able to catch her breath.
Man. That’s a real shame when folks be throwing away a perfectly good dead hooker like that.
Indeed. And imagine my initial panic and chagrin when I done choked my hooker to death, only to find the space under the box spring already containing a previous guest’s dead hooker.
Boy was that a pickle… and a life lesson: always be sure to check under the bed in case your hooker, one way or another ends up dead. Don’t want to have to borrow the adjoining room’s high hotel bed.
Well, look at what this thread has turned into.
Ahh, my old man making inside jokes. Cuuuute.
That article of finding dead people under your hotel bed made me a tad green… Oof. It’s horrible to think about. shudder
You wish you would have found one, then you get to go to your neighbor’s who has the hanging bed. Sleepoverrr~!
That actually happened in Atlantic City several years ago. The tourist smelled something funny and, sure enough, there was a body under there. I don’t think it was a hooker, though.
The height of the bed is a real challenge for me since I am in a wheelchair. Transferring to my normal heighted bed at home is pretty much level. In a hotel I literally have to throw myself into bed and fall back into my chair when getting up. Fortunately my right leg is still functional. If it was not I literally could not get into a hotel bed. Since I can make it work for my disability I have never asked if they have normal heighted beds but I suspect that it would not be an option.
My guess is that it’s at least in part a style thing. I know when I was traveling a lot for business many years ago, this was not a problem.
I’m less than tall, so getting in a high bed is an issue for me. The bed in the guest room at my nephew’s house is so high they have a portable wood step next to the bed – tres chic, you know, and tres PITA when you have to get up at night to pee.
Which leads to another hotel room theory – the beds are high because they had to do something with the leftover material from making the toilet so low. My knees are shot, and getting up from a low toilet can be an issue. With luck, the vanity or tub will be close enough to the toilet so that i can use one or the other as an assist, but sometimes I’m reduced to leaving the door open so I can use the knob to help me rise.
I thought maybe the toilets are low to accommodate young children, but then there’s no way the four-year-old can get on that high bed without help, so mommy or daddy are going to have to get up to help anyway.
What is different between a ‘standard’ hotel room and a handicapped accessible room? Is it just the latter has a larger bathroom with stand-bars and a level entry to the shower? Seems like a lower-height bed would be an obvious accommodation as well.
Larger bathroom. Hand-bars around the toilet and the bathtub. Sometimes a stool in the bathtub. Sometimes, instead of a tub, a shower you can roll into. Lower sink. Space under the sink for your knees, if you are in a wheelchair. Sometimes, faucets built to accomodate people whose hands are less mobile.
Extra space around the bed. (However, a LOT of wheelchairs are too wide to fit into the ADA-mandated space.) Light switches placed lower on the walls. Peephole placed lower on the door.
Googling, some accessible hotel rooms have adjustable height beds. If you’re planning travel, call the hotel and ask them. If they don’t have this, ask (in advance, preferably) if they can lower it (perhaps they can move the bedspring and mattress to the floor). And if there’s too much furniture in the room to move the wheelchair around, ask if they can remove some.
Friends of my parents used to ask hotels to provide a small refrigerator for the room, supposedly to store medication but really to store food they brought from home (being frugal). They never had a problem with the request.
Again since I am able to manage the bed I have not asked for accommodations regarding bed height but yes I suppose if I did the hotel chain could make those alterations to the bed height for me.
From what I have found the bathroom is where I see the obvious alterations with bars for transferring to the toilet. The shower again is an obvious place where there is an ADA alterations but I have never actually taken advantage of them. I have found that showers/bath usually has a fold down bench opposite the shower head and water controls that are not reachable from the sitting position. In order to take a shower I would have to turn the water on before transferring and that is just too much of a risk of slipping and falling for me to take. I do not travel a lot and when I do I just pretty much resign myself to not showering for those 2 to 4 days I am traveling. If I was to travel for any longer length of time I would travel with a shower bench and the tub mat I use at home to ensure safe transfers. Even with those I would need to pick a hotel where the transfer bars are located on the same side as the water controls.
I have also seen the lower peep hole as well. Open sink design seems to be a pretty typical feature regardless of the ADA designation so I have not really paid much attention to that. I have never seen lowered light switches but I suspect that too may be features of an ADA room.