In the same spirit as all the other “smart” threads:
What are the qualities you possess that confirm you’re a smart person? How do you know that you haven’t deluded yourself?
Mr. Neville says I’m smart because I read faster than he does (he says I read faster than most people).
Other people say I’m smart because I have a master’s degree in astronomy from a good university.
I don’t feel very smart, though.
I’m smart enough to have stayed out of those other threads. 
I can roll my tongue. I can read at or above a 5th grade level. I rarely get lost in my house or even my neighborhood. Many dogs come when I call them. I can read an analog clock. I can use a calculator to add up as much as 5 or 6 numbers. I know that a 2 x 4 isn’t quite that size when you get it home from the store. I can tell left from right even with my eyes closed. I once road a bike 50 feet without training wheels. I can break egg without spilling the yoke 7 times out of 10. I can operate a cable box. I know what a dishwasher is for. I can read a gas gauge even without looking at the letters. I can name 20 states from memory. I can identify both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans on a map. I can speak with people all over the globe in English. I can dog paddle.
I’m smart enough to be an underachiever and just enjoy myself.
I’m so smart, my favorite beer is called Three Philosophers.
I don’t use spellcheck. Except for words like convienent and accomodation, which are my eternal bugaboos. :smack:
Well you are gotdammit.
One smart fella, he felt smart.
Two smart fellas, they felt smart.
Three smart fellas, they all felt smart.
People assume I’m smart because I’m quick-witted.
I guess people correlate a clever sense of humor with intelligence.
I do not argue with them, even though I’m not positive that they’re correct.
Then I am smrter, because;
I can roll my tongue and whistle the 5th Brandenburg.
When I drink beer I become a philosopher.
And I KNOW that 2x4’s change size from purchase due to transport losses.