On the other hand, plenty of American ladies just swoon at my English accent (if anyone out there requires swoonage, I’ll be happy to oblige)
[back to gross linguistic hijack]
Gospodin in common usage does, in fact, mean “Mister.” Think of it as analogous to the English “Sir.” In one context, it’s an ordinary, modern formal greeting; in another, it connotes knighthood/nobility. *Gospod, * however, is a more archaic form, and means “Lord.”
And sorry I’m not familiar with Terry Pratchett! I apparently don’t read enough fiction in English, as you can probably tell by my own username…
I have heard that American men have plenty of luck in Japan, but the Japanese women I know in the US (mostly students who are planning to return to Japan) universally refuse to date American men. The only possible exception is Japanese-American men who aren’t too Americanized. I’ve heard several gripe that they just won’t be able to have boyfriends until they get back to Japan. These women don’t seem to find American men unattractive per se, but feel that the cultural differences are too great to make a serious relationship possible.
I’ll agree with scr4 for what attracts Japanese women to American men. The stereotype (in Japan) of what a Japanese man should be is someone completely devoted to his company, willing to work obscenely long hours, only coming home long enough to sleep a few hours, wolf down a meal his wife cooks and perhaps conceive a kid or two, who are then raised completely by their mother. Basically, a sperm donor with a monthly salary. Also (to continue the stereotype), fidelity is a low priority, with mistresses, or at least fooling around at sex clubs, the norm. This stereotype is reinforced by many TV programs and movies made in Japan.
When they watch American TV shows or movies, however, they see husbands who are home at 5, take an active role in raising the kids, and routinely hug or kiss their wives (Bewitched, Little House on the Prairie, and Full House were long-running favorites on TV here. Dharma and Greg was also popular for a while). Also, most TV shows (the older ones, anyway) portray fidelity as an absolute necessity that both husband and wife take very seriously.
In large part because of the media images they see, many Japanese women think of American (and other western) men as more romantic, better emotional providers and (according to some of my housewife students) better lovers. Inaccurate, perhaps, but who am I to complain?
Money, in this case, never really enters the picture.
To comment on Lamia’s observations, perhaps the women living in America, seeing us in our natural habitat, realize that the image they’ve been getting from movies and TV is a far cry from reality and are turned off. The desire to return to their home country and the expectation that most of the guys they’ll meet have no interest in moving to Japan probably play a large part as well.
I do know several Japanese women who’ve married American guys they’ve met in the States. Most of them, however, had already finished school and were looking at living at least semi-permanently in the US.
Perhaps because American men are taller than average? Height has been showing to be an attractive factor in men (sorry, no cite at hand).
Well as I guy I always got the impression that a good portion of the female community just liked foreign guys period. So American guys do well with foreign women and conversely a good number of American chicks go for foreign guys.(Usually European but not always.) Then again I am a guy so I’m probably totally clueless:D
Muad’Dib originally wrote this:
“Many of the women and girls have said to me … that men from their home countries were useless slobs and that American men were the best husbands, fathers, lovers, etc, etc in the world.”
I doubt that any of these things would have been influenced greatly by height. Dave_D’s observation, on the other hand, is similar to my own experience.
Well, here in Korea foreign (white) guys have it extremely easy. Korean girls/women are attracted to them for a variety of reasons and its not uncommon to see a fairly average looking white-guy by North American standards with a stunningly beautiful korean girl.
Its not just Americans though, any caucasian. US, Canada, British, Australian.
Alot of it has to do with novelty, ie. blue eyes and hair-colour other than black. Also, Korean men tend to be fairly domineering, demand their women be virginal. In fact, hymen replacement surgery is a big business in Korea and the majority of women who get married who have had pre-marital sex get it done so their husband has the illusion of marrying a maiden.
Whereas western men tend to treat the women more to a degree they like, more casual, not afraid of their girlfriends expressing their sexuality etc.
Its also not uncommon here for a girl to get involved with a western male just to practice/improve her English.
I could go on, but bottom line is that ugly white guys get hot korean girls. Korean girls also tend to be a attracted to men who aren’t incredibly masculine, more feminine actually. But it varies… anyhow… the Korean men who are considered extremely handsome are definately more “pretty boy”-ish than ruggedly handsome.
Mrs. Gas–no, that doesn’t work, let’s just say my wife–is Egyptian. The Egyptians tell this joke:
Mother 1: It’s been a long time! So how are your two children, a boy and a girl, right?
Mother 2: Yes–my daughter is married now, and she’s SO happy. She married an American, and he’s just wonderful. He cooks, cleans, takes care of the children, sends her flowers. . .
Mother 1: And your son?
Mother 2: He married an American girl, and he’s miserable, it’s just horrible.
Mother 1: Why?
Mother 2: She expects him to cook, clean, take care of the children, send her flowers. . . .
So it is true?
i can’t really give a good answer to the OP. i’m too modest.
Wow. How come no one brought this up in my thread about reasons to travel?
The Brazilian women I know who have married American men (including my wife!) have made many comments supporting this theory.
On a recent trip to Rio, we were at my wife’s cousin’s house watching her (the cousin) prepare lunch. We were going to take care of some business afterwards, so we had a guy with us who was a friend of the family. He was from a different region of the country, where the “machista” still rules, and he went on to describe how when he comes home for lunch, he sits down and waits to be served. He will not get up to fill his plate even if the food is already prepared and he is starving. He sits and waits for his wife to serve him.
Several minutes later, I walked over to and retrieved a plateful of delicious home-cooked food from the pot on the stove. Before we began to eat, we noticed that this fellow’s plate was empty. I was mortified to see my wife spring up from her chair and promptly fill his plate, after having watched me retrieve my own food. Of course, she did so out of habit, good manners and all. She hadn’t even connected her action with the story we had just heard, and once I told her, she kicked herself for not having made him do without.
Wow. Science marches on…
yeah, sorry, i don’t rate the north americans as highly as i rate most european men.
admittedly i’m probably not talking typical male here, but the americans i know (mostly students, aged 22-28) act much more immaturely towards women than irish guys their age…actually they act more like 15 year olds, or members of particularly rowdy fraternity.
these guys discuss certain things, loudly, in public, that don’t really belong outside of the bedroom, and so tend to be less respectful of casual partners than irishmen, who generally keep their mouths shut.
the nicest american guys, as far as their attitudes to women go, i know are non-white, of various flavours and combinations, including native american/mexican, and peurto-rican/nigerian
they seem to have the “women are equal” attitude, without the “obnoxious braggard” attitude on the side.
I seem to remember reading quite a few articles about obesession with American culture, in Asian countries at least, and i think that would naturally lead to an obsession with American men. Sorry i have no specific examples, but it should be to hard to see how well American clothing sells in Japan.
One cause of resentment was that the Commonwealth countries were running out of money by the time the Americans arrived, and their exchange rates were falling. The result of which was that by 1943 an American sergeant got paid more than an Australian major. So the Americans had more to spend on candy, flowers, and nylons, as well as having been raised to do so.
According to my mother (who was dating in Sydney during the War), American servicemen tended to be notably polite, considerate, and generous, whereas British officers were rude, condescending, and tight. She had just sworn off Englishmen when she met my father. Dad was an officer in the RN, but was (1) immensely tall, (2) rather a dish, and (3) an exception among poms.
Regards,
Agback
I should have mentioned that this trend was not very noticable in European nations. Except that it is instead American women that are said to have above average reputations.
I actually wrote an essay on the World War II thing quite recently (although it was about New Zealand, not Australia). The general gist was that New Zealand men had created a very male-oriented culture which was really non-communicative: plus New Zealand women’s culture was more oriented towards consumer capitalism (movies, department stores) than the men’s culture, which was all about rugby and tough ‘man alone’ stuff. So American men seemed great because they actually enjoyed dating and talking and spending time (as well as money) with the Kiwi girls.
And teeth. You have no idea how many New Zealand women who lived through World War II go on and on about American soldiers’ excellent teeth… odd, generally.