Not why do people talk to their pets… I do that. Because my dog responds. I can communicate affection or commands or irritation. I don’t expect her to understand sentences, but she responds to tone of voice and some words: walk, eat, out, sit, wait.
Why do people talk for their pets?
[pookie-voice] “I don’t want to go for walkies, I want to sit in you lap and eat tweats! Yes, I do!”[/pookie-voice]
I can see occasionally speaking ironically or farcically for an animal ([parrot-voice] “SQUAWK, birds can’t talk. SQUAWK.” [/parrot-voice]) but I really believe some people think they’re channelling their pets!
I initially conceived this as a GQ question, but I presumed it would be similar to asking, “Why do people dream they’ve gone to work in their underpants?”
What I’d like is other people’s thoughts, opinions and experiences with this behavior. If you have some psychological reference, that would be good too, but I just want to know if I’m the only one who thinks this is bizarre behavior.
I should note that this thread was inspired by a recent conflict between myself and a family member. I assumed she was speaking for herself, but it turned out she was speaking for her cat. I really blew-up, because she was acting as though everyone was mistreating her. I felt bad about yelling, I don’t yell very often, but I also felt she was saying that she had been sorely dispossessed by her intrusive family that she invited over! But that’s an issue for the Pit
I talk for my cat - or perhaps, more accurately, I tend to narrate for her. She might wander into the room and flop over, and I’ll say “She’s looking at me saying ‘gimme a belly rub, GIMME A BELLY RUB’” because, really, that’s usually what she wants when she flops over.
Or we’ll laugh at something, or do something which makes her look at us funny (pretty much anything we do) and either my husband or I will draw attention to the cat and say “She’s thinking “what the fuck are you two doing, you dumbasses?””
I don’t know why we do it, though. Maybe because she doesn’t usually contribute vocally to anything that’s going on, but she just gets these looks and you know what she’d be saying if she were human and could speak english. And maybe simply because we love her, which is why parents also speak on behalf of their not-yet-old-enough-to-talk babies. It’s just something you do.
I don’t need to speak for our cats. They are quite capable of speaking for themselves, and are very vocal about what they want, need or are upset about.
I think that it’s people projecting their own unspoken thoughts and feelings onto an animal (“Mr. Snuggums doesn’t like to be alone, does he? No he does not!”). I’ve seen some people take it to a level of almost some sort of animal partner schizophrenia and it bewilders the hell out of me. I just can’t regard animals as little fuzzy retarded children*. I pray that I never get that lonesome.
*Yes, I know all pet owners are not batshit insane. Everyone with pets does what mnemosyne does and it’s normal. Talking weird baby talk in the first person for your pets when there are other people around is not.
In the altercation I mentioned, it wasn’t even a baby voice and I had to wonder if it wasn’t meant as a way to say things no normal person would say under the circumstances and somehow expect it to sound somehow sane.
I have parrots, and I can read their body language . I have friends who want to touch the birds, but are not used to the signals parrots give off, so I will translate the birds until the human can establish a rapport with the bird. (African greys read human body language well) It sort of goes “He isn’t sure about you, he wants reassurances- tell him he’s pretty. When he gets all fluffy and shakes, that means he is happy. Don’t let him kiss you, he’s gonna slip you the tongue. He doesn’t like having you pet him, his feathers are all flat. Okay, look at his fluffy sideburns: he is smiling. When he grinds his beak its sort of like purring” After that, they get along without me, unless Steve bird does one his elaborate symbolic pantomime gestures"Steve says that sucks".
I’m not sure I think my pets are my children, but they’re certainly fuzzy and stupid.
I talk for them. I think it’s a habit carried over from when I was little and talked for my stuffed animals. My cats are only slightly brighter than stuffed animals, so I’m perfectly happy ascribing personality to them. I’m not cutesy, either. It tends to be, “I hate you! You don’t feed me! You don’t love me! I am abandoned and saaad!” instead of, “Snookums wuuuvs you, Mommy!” It’s fun to make fun of them.
My mom thinks I’m emotionally abusing my animals.
Sounds like for some people it’s a really passive-aggressive (not sure if I’m using that properly but bear with me) way of saying whatever they want to, without taking any accountability.
I don’t know if I talk for my dog. Hmmm…I’m sure I must, I just can’t think of when I have.
Anyway, when I brought my puppy home and was still living with my folks I noticed a LOT of passive-agression being sent via the dog.
We’d say things to the dog like:
“Tell Grammy to shut up”
“Tell Uncle Bobby he’s mean”
“Your mommy doesn’t walk you enough does she?”
“Mommy needs to buy you better food”
Etc etc. I remember being really shocked and put off by this behavior. The four adults in the house communicating harshly via the dog.
And I do admit to being batshit crazy and having normal as-if-she-were-a-person conversations with the dog. I am indeed that lonely. But it’s cool - I have my dog
Same here! We have five, and they all have their own “voices” that we use when we talk through them. None of them use baby talk, btw–in fact, we portray our older Singapura as kind of a cynical, world-weary “big brother” type who prides himself on his hunting ability (he’s never hunted anything more intimidating than a catnip mouse, but he’s so *intense * about it). The big tabby girl is a tomboy, the two Russian girls are the princesses, and our younger Singapura is a cheerful little boy with a touch of “frat guy.” These characters all fit with their actual personalities, and it’s just fun to talk to each other through the cats sometimes.
Believe it or not, it sometimes helps when we’re having an argument, too. There’s something psychologically okay about answering the cat when you don’t want to talk to the person.
I guess that seems pretty sane and rational. I do the same with my dog and people who want to treat her like a Lab. My dog is just not that friendly. She’s not mean, at all, she just won’t jump up on you and kiss your face when you first meet her.
I’ve had more experience with the type Stainz mentions though. Maybe less passive aggresive and more… psychotic? (I’m very unhappy. I don’t like the mean man who won’t use a coaster, no. I think the bad man ought to rot in hell. Rot right in the pit of hell, yes!)
But, it sounds like I’m in the minority on that front.
If ever I say to someone, here or in the outside world, “So yeah, my husband thought the bigger bag of cat food was a better deal, and the cat agreed” - that’s just a joke, son, a joke. I’m a big fan of throwing in a phrase or two of totally nonsensical occurances in a deadpan tone, just to get a laugh. This works well, often. If they don’t realise it’s a joke (they don’t even have to laugh, finding it not funny is a valid option, a witty rejoinder or even a rolleyes is acceptable), that’s okay, since we probably won’t be hanging out much.
