Amen to that! If I’m really feeling cheeky, I can call a few of them out specifically (some of these people are shoo-ins for Springer!)…
:o
Ummm…I asked my daughter for the same thing.
Not because I’m worried for her soul. ( And my United Methodist minister would never embarass someone by calling them out that way) But I wanted her there because:
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she wanted to use my car while I was a work and it would have been easier if we went to church together and both left early and drove downtown.
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She would have had to sit with MY mom, and that would have pleased Grandma to have her grandaughter give her a hug and kiss, and a chance to show her off to her pew-mates.
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It would have made me happy to look out and see my beautiful daughter, instead of having to look at all my friends’ beautiful daughters.
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I wouldn’t feel like such a failure as a mother…that my own children don’t want to spend time with me on Mother’s Day. Even though I’m not a Mother’s Day fanatic. Even though I respect my children’s decisions to take a break from church-going. I still get embarassed when people ask if my kids are in church today, and I have to say no, they wanted to sleep. They never let ME sleep…
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If she came to church occasionally, I could introduce her to the really cute, sweet nice guy in choir who’s just a few years older than her and SO much nicer than all the jerks she’s been involved with lately…and she says she wants to meet a better class of men…
So, auntie em maybe Mom wanted so there because she loves you and is proud of you and wants everyone who matters to her to see what a great kid you are. Not because it was church, but because that’s where her friends are.
Thanks, kittenblue, for a little perspective on the situation… and you’re probably right to some extent…
But given that my mother frequently comments about how I’m basically a “good” person (thoughtful, kindhearted, etc.), I just need to go to church (hence the implication that my “virtues” don’t count unless they’re coupled with church membership), I’d say it’s a little of both.
Also, as someone who’s been a “Trophy Kid” (how I feel about that is a whole different thread) my whole life, I can tell you that I’ve been “shown off” via a multitude of venues; in fact, the reason I know the majority of people at that church despite the fact that I rarely attend is because they’re the exact same people who went to school with my mom, who are in her bridge clubs or her “lunch bunches”, and who have been attending parties in my parents’ home since before I was born.
In other words, she’s not at a lack for avenues by which to put her kids on display, and I think they’re getting sick of looking at my ass anyway. 
Anyway, good luck with your daughter and the choir boy. Do those two kids know of your motherly plot to unite them?
Actually, I’m actively setting choir-boy up with my physical therapist…they are e-mailing each other now because I forced them to, and phone numbers are on the docket for this week. My daughter is the back-up plan…he would be the perfect son-in-law (and yes, I would stop personally lusting after him) but she needs to grow up a bit…in other words, he’s perfect for her, but she’s not yet perfect for him.
In fact, the entire church seems to be a on a mission to get this boy hitched…mothers are lining up their daughters, and friends are dragging out their recently-divorced friends.
Mom, is that you? That guilt trip sounds sooooooo familiar.
Sheri
MIL has decided that I am the sole reason her darling baby boy no longer attends church on a regular basis.
This change in habit has NOTHING to do with the fact that he lived at home until we got married and MIL co-erced him into church attendance each Sunday. Now that he is free to choose, he goes when HE feels like it.
So we did the obligatory church attendance on Mothers Day and it turned into a bit of fun.
The bible reading mentioned “God is Awesome”
Me to Leechboy “I didn’t know the Bible writer spoke Valley Girl”
During the sermon we were told God rules the Empire of our hearts. This led Leechboy and I to a heated discussion about the Christian sub plot in Star Wars - was there one. Was God the Emperor or Darth Vader?
For those who are interested Holy Ghost : Emperor, God : Darth Vader which makes Jesus Christ : Luke Skywalker!
so basically we sat in the back row and acted like very badly behaved children, giggling and passing notes to each other. We had the best time. MIL however was NOT impressed 
Auntie Em, don’t you live next door to Munchkinland? Seems to me that Munchkin ass would be small, but not very covetable.
And I also want to be one of your worshippers, but, I uh, don’t think I can make it this Sunday.
Unless you’re singing! 
I have to say that this thread sounds very familiar, especially since I just got off the phone with my mother, and we were “discussing” a similar topic.
I believe that church is important, but I don’t pressure people into going. If they want to go, that’s fine with me. If they don’t, there’s nothing I can do about it.
Tonight, I didn’t want to go to Fellowship because I didn’t feel like it. Let’s be honest here: there are some times you don’t feel like doing things. I know there are times when you have to do things you don’t want to do, but work with me here.
So I get on the phone to my sister and tell her I’m not going. She demands a reason, so I give excuse that I have to do the laundry. (I do, but I’m not doing it tonight… perhaps tomorrow) Then she calls me bad, and hangs up. Fine, I thought… that’s okay. At least I can enjoy my weekend without having to have sontact with annoying people. (otherwise known as certain members of my family)
Just when I was about to truly relax and chill out, I got disconnected from the Internet again. Turned out to be my mom, who claimed that since she was “concerned about my spiritual life”, I either had to go to Fellowship or go to a family friend’s house for dinner to see someone who’d been asking after me. (incidentally, I don’t know this person) I don’t think so, Mom!
While I think Fellowship is important, I had planned on NOT going tonight. I like going, but sometimes if you don’t feel like it, then that kind of takes the enjoyment out of it. And if I’m not going to go anyways, you’re not going to MAKE me go! That kind of defeats the purpose, in my opinion.
By the way, Mom: my spiritual life is just fine! I know you probably think that I’m doomed to burn in hell if I don’t go to Fellowship once, or miss church twice in five weeks for what you deem to be spurious reasons, but really. :rolleyes: Sometimes my spiritual life may not be all it can be, but that has nothing to do with my absences from Fellowship and church. And that would be a whole other thread, which I might not start anyways.
So then my mother says I don’t have my priorities straight. I could do my laundry any other time, so why now? Because this was the first time the laundry machines were free in the apartment! (or that’s what I told her) So why didn’t I do it before? I told her that I’d been out for part of the day. Then she came up with a brilliant idea: leave my wet clothes in my laundry basket in the laundry room and do it some other time! Now, I’m not afraid of leaving my clothes in the laundry room, bur certainly not for longer than a few minutes! Not that people will steal them, but you never know. Besides, my laundry is at a critical mass stage, so it’s not like I don’t need to do it sometime! (and no, I was NOT procrastinating just so I could have an excuse not to go to Fellowship tonight) Yes, I could do it at any other time, but tonight is when I chose to do it! (at least hypothetically)
I told her I didn’t want to do that, so she came up with Plan B: put my wet clothes in a garbage bag, then I can dry them in their dryer! No, I prefer to dry my clothes ASAP after they’ve been in the washing machine. Certainly better than having them almost dried and THEN put in the dryer! Besides, I wasn’t planning on going to my parents’ in any case. There’s no choir, and no looking after the kids… so why go to an environment where I’ll most likely get annoyed to no end? (my parents’ house) I want to ENJOY as much of the weekend as I can, thank you very much.
Then my mom said that since my laundry might be done by the time they went out for dinner, then I had to go to the dinner. Considering I didn’t want to go to Fellowship with my sibs, the only other alternative had to be spending time with my parents to see someone who I don’t even remember. :rolleyes: Apparently, I had to go see this person because she always asked about me when I was a sick baby. (and had asked after me last week when she got into town) [note: I was at least 9 or 10 weeks premature, and weighed 2 pounds, 2 ounces at birth] That’s nice, but I can’t and don’t remember that!
So then she proceeded to make plans with me as if I was going to the dinner: hello? Just because I asked what time the dinner was, ahd asked who else would be there, is NOT an indicator that I’m going to surrender to your idea of the proper way to do things! I went along with it, for that time, then hung up.
Later, she called me back again, but I ignored the phone. (easy to do when you have the ringer turned off) A couple of minutes later, I called the house just in case. My sister answered, and said that my parents were just leaving. Good, I told her, because I wasn’t going anywhere since I had two (hypothetical) loads of laundry to do! She then called to my parents: “She’s not going anywhere, she says… the fatso!” Believe me, I reamed her out good for calling me that! You just don’t DO that, you got it?
Honestly, what part of “I’m not going anywhere tonight” do you not understand? I did tell her I wasn’t going anywhere. I just wish she wouldn’t guilt-trip me, but tonight I triumphed, and am posting here! She did say, “But don’t you like the friends at Fellowship? They appreciate you…” I know they do, but that’s not all there is to it! Yes, I want to be around people who appreciate me, but if I don’t feel like going to Fellowship or church, that’s all there is to it. It’s not like I’ll think: “Oh, people who appresciate me are going to be there, so I better go even if I don’t feel like it.”
So why didn’t I just tell her that I didn’t want to go because I didn’t feel like it? (that’s an excessive use of the word “didn’t” for that sentence) Because she would tell me that I HAD to go, even if I didn’t feel like it! Sometimes I do go when I don’t feel like it, but not tonight. Frankly, I’m not sure that I wouldn’t have given in to her pressure, so that’s why I wasn’t completely honest with her. Besides, it’s kind of hard to be honest with my mom.
If I didn’t go to church, my friends would notice it, and ask me about it, but they wouldn’t go about it like my mom and sister do! Sometimes the kids I know at church notice when I don’t go, and so I get my sister telling me that this kid or that kid had asked her where I was. Occasionally, I’ll get the kids themselves asking me the next week. That’s easier to deal with, because they can’t guilt-trip me.
Not that I don’t go to church ordinarily; I do, and like it. But sometimes when I don’t feel like it, or don’t feel well, I wish she’d just accept it, and not make any judgements as to where my spiritual life is headed! Sheesh…
auntie em, I’m glad I don’t sit anywhere near my mother when I go to church! Heck, we’re in different congregations, so that’s a huge relief! Sitting next to or near my brother and sister is not a problem, or at least, not as big a problem as sitting next to my parents would be! :eek: