You heartless bitch. You used your religion to ruin your son's wedding day.

The BBQ Pit
1

[Disclaimer] This is not a catholic bashing. I repeat, this is not a catholic bashing. [/Disclaimer]

My best friend got married last Saturday. It was a very lovely wedding, and that’s the only time you’ll every get those words out of me in my life. They did it in a historic church (250 years old?) in Charleston, SC. I’m sure we looked like something out of Southern Living magazine. I was the best man, and a damn good one. I did my best to get John calmed down throughout the day and help him take care of things (legal, rental car, hotel, etc)

We finally get to the church and it’s that deal where everybody is there just waiting on go time. I’m walking around the church and pass John talking to his mom and dad. The looked very serious, like they were praying or something so I just quickened my step and moved along.

Later, John joins me in the room where we and the preacher wait to go out. John looks at me and quietly says, “She’s not going to do anything.” I think he’s going to cry.

John’s parents are catholic. John’s mom is upset that John is not marrying a catholic girl. So upset she refused to participate in the wedding and waited for 15 minutes before the show to tell him. And we’re not talking about singing a song, we’re talking about lighting some candles or some mundane shit like that.

You stupid self absorbed, inconsiderate attention whore bitch. How in the fuck is it that I care more about your son than you do. If you are so opposed to the wedding, stay home. Don’t fucking come to the wedding, sit in the front row and cry and look away the whole time. I don’t know what you think you accomplished in being such an ass but I hope you’re happy. You got to be the star of your own pathetic soap opera for a day.

2

Very sad. Especially since the church has no problem with Catholics marrying non-Catholics. Though they do generally insist that it be a Catholic wedding. Maybe this is the sticking point.

My cousin married an atheist, and the church provided her with the appropriate rite.

This woman sounds, literally, more Catholic than the Pope. Worse than that, though, is upstaging the actual wedding. No excuse for that at all - she should have stayed home.

3

That sanctimonious bitch. Please! Please, tell me she didn’t make a scene and ruin it for your friend. I would be so bent out of shape if that were me. I’d have told my mom to leave, get out of the church. What a fucking loser she is.

I was raised catholic but have not practiced in over 15 years. I was married by a JOP and had a wonderous ceremony.

Oh I hope it turned out ok for both your friend and his new wife

4

The son should have sent her home if she was going to be such a selfcentered bitch. I would have if it had been MY mother!

5

Bruce_Daddy, I am so sorry for your best friend. What his mother did was inexcusable. Sure, it’s every parent’s right to not agree with who their child is marrying but the time to bring that up is not 15 minutes before the ceremony.

I hope your best friend was still able to enjoy his wedding - knowing that he just started (hopefully) the best times of his life. And I hope his mother realized that she most probably harmed or ruined her relationship with her son (and any future grandchildren)

6

I really hate it when things like this happen. I mean, how close-minded can you be? This is why if I ever get married, I want to elope and get married in Vegas.

7

That’s DISGUSTING.

8

And this bitch believes in a god so twisted that he will reward such action?

In the long run, the pain will fade, this will become an amusing story, and will inform your friend and his spouse on how to be better parents than this loser.

9

I’d have asked her to leave. That’s sickening.

Ava

10

Disgusting, but not surprising. The attitude some Catholics have when it comes to marriage outside the church can be outrageously self-centered. I’m a Protestant married to a Catholic and I really had to dig in my heels when it came to getting married. My mother-in-law told my husband that if the church didn’t recognize our marriage she wouldn’t either. Luckily we found a rogue priest who found that disgusting too.

11

Holy crap. Was this in a Catholic church, or no? If it was, I’m shocked that the mother thought that she could pull this weasely act when their religion was going to be blessing the union. If not, she’s still an utter bitch. I hope someone quoted her the verse about how a man leaves his parents and cleaves to his wife. :stuck_out_tongue: At least my paternal grandmother, a Protestant who vehemently opposed her daughter marrying a Catholic, had enough sense to fucking stay home rather than pull the weepy-mother-losing-her-baby-to-a-“heathen” act in church.

FWIW, I’m not Catholic, but my husband is/was (long story), and we were married in a Catholic church. We had the same ceremony as any two-Catholic couple.

12

An aunt and uncle of mine – converts to Catholism – ruin weddings and funerals in the same way, or worse. Dinsdale is right – we do laugh now at their attempt to drown out How Great Thou Art at another aunt’s funeral with Latin prayers.

13

This was a :eek: Baptist church. And on capitalizing that, I realized I probably should have capitalized Catholic.

Also, he know all along that she was didn’t approve, we just didn’t think she’d show her ass at the wedding.

The funny thing is that his dad was super cool. :shakes head:

And a question. I’ve told some people about this and they tend to think that she believes he’s now going to hell for either marrying a non-Catholic or quitting the Catholic church or both. Any Catholics out there able to clear that up?

14

Can you imagine what this poor gal is going to have to endure during holiday get togethers? I hope the mother someday comes to her senses about just how hateful she’s being, not just to her DIL but to her son as well.

Ahhh, misplaced religious zealoutry. How quaint.

15

All I know is that my UCC relatives are coming to my Pagan gay wedding and they can sit down and shut up for the duration if they don’t like it. Otherwise no more Christmas gifts ever.

16

http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/ac0690.asp

This discusses many of the issues of interfaith marriages, from a Catholic perspective.

This site shows much more tolerance than John’s mom.

17

matt: UCC = United Church of Christ, or is that an abbreviation for some form of Catholicism? If the former, they’re a pretty liberal branch.

Bruce, like I said I’m not Catholic, but my impression is that Catholics definitely don’t - well, shouldn’t - think that other Christians are hell-bound, and that it’s not officially taught that way. The official word is supposed to be that their version of the religion is the best but that you can reach salvation in other ways.

I hope the father didn’t know what stunt his wife was going to pull either, and the only reason he didn’t drag her ass out of the church was because he thought she’d make a worse spectacle in the process.

18

Well strategically it was a bonehead move, and not to be sexist, but it was especially stupid for the MIL to do this to the bride.

After marriage who do you think usually initiates, controls, schedules and mediates the vast majority of interaction with family members on both sides. Hint… it’s not the husband.

By POing the wife the MIL has effectively sliced her prospective “grandkid” access time to bare minimum levels if she gets any at all. What went around will come around in this case and it will likely come around with a vengenace.

19

Dread Pirate Jimbo and I were married last August; he’s a lapsed Catholic, I’m a Pantheistic Neo-Christian. We were married by a Justice of the Peace in our community hall - there was not one word said, by either family, about any of our choices (not even by Jim’s fairly religious grandparents). I expected no different; it just isn’t anybody else’s business.

John’s mom is doing a great job at turning people off of Catholicism; I don’t suppose she realizes that, though.

(summerbreeze, that is unbelievably bad behaviour. Did anyone kick them out or tell them to knock it the hell off?)

20

There may be hope…my mum is a devout Catholic who had some strict ideas for us, too (it was loverly having mum arguing with Girl Scout leaders that I HAD to attend Mass if I were going to camp with the troop – not at a meeting, but standing at the bus, waiting to go away! If I spent a Saturday night at a non Catholic friend’s house, she would insist the parents take me to Church on Sunday, even when I would say, ‘No, no, it’s ok, I’m not into all that!’)

When my brother married his first wife in 1977, the girl was non-Catholic, and my mum was horrid at the wedding. Oh, she attended the wedding and reception, and we have the photos of this dead-faced zombie to prove it. Fortunately my brother and sister-in-law and everyone else knew what she was like, but, crikey.

Things were even more festive when they divorced, and my ex sister in law started to date my other brother – my mum really came into her own! I was only 13, but she refused to speak to me for a month when she found out I had spoken to them…

And then one day, after about a year of this shite, I was home with mum, and she said, ‘Let’s go see Mary.’

I assumed that she’d been possessed by space aliens, because this was the last sentence I expected from her. I went anyway, even though I was still young and small, to protect Mary!

When we showed up, Mary was stunned – and more so when my mum said, ‘What I have done, and the way I have treated you is so bloody foolish, it has got to stop. Will you forgive me?’ And she meant it. I don’t know why she suddenly had the change of heart, but she did, and she and Mary were very close until Mary’s death a few years later.

She is still very devout and all, but this prejudice against non Catholics and agnostics and all of it is completely gone…in fact, she hadn’t wished me to go to uni to study medieval history, cos she was afraid I would ‘lose my religion’ – and these days she is very interested in Church history.

She says just one day she realised that her faith and beliefs were not challenged or diminished by other people’s, and that it was so silly & a waste of time to go around behaving as she had.

best wishes!