My folks, having retired to the Northeast U.S., are now talking about taking their retirement someplace warmer in the next few years (once the grandkids are old enough to come visit without Mom and Dad). Specifically, Virginia - they’ve vacationed there and found it pleasant. Where they’d go in Virginia, I’m not sure - the Richmond area has been mentioned a couple of times, so let’s assume that they’d go there.
Normally, this wouldn’t be an issue for me - travel is cheap, and I could visit them in Virginia as easily as anywhere else. However, after a couple of years of broad hints about how nice it is to have their *other * child and grandchildren nearby, I’ve been thinking it might be nice to move to someplace closer to them.
So, tell me why I’d like to move to the area around Richmond, Virginia (assuming that they go there), or why I’d be better off to stay far, far away. Here’s a little bit of information about me to make it easier:
I’m Jewish (not Orthodox)
I’m gay
I have no children
I will be honest and say up front that I have not tended to think of that part of the country as particularly gay- or Jew-friendly. I’m willing to be corrected if I’m wrong about that.
Cost of living is going up - big time. We’ve been looking into moving back there (I grew up there), but housing prices are stopping us.
The city leans somewhat conservative (the hardest part for me when I lived there), but there are fairly open pockets of liberalism - I’d say the Fan is pretty progressive.
It’s not a bad place to live - obviously, or I wouldn’t want to return there. It’s definitely more conservative than the Northeast, but you can find us liberals out there if you look;).
Nah, you’re right, at least about the gay part. Virginia’s been busily passing anti-gay legislation lately, and while it hurts me to see my beloved Commonwealth in the throes of xenophobia like this, at least I’m now on the other side of the Potomac, so I don’t have to deal with it anymore.
If your parents move to Richmond, my advice would be: find a job in the DC area, live in southern Maryland, and you’d be within easy driving distance for weekend visits.
It’s a neighborhood downtown - older, funky-ish houses that seem to be inhabited by younger couples or singles. Walking distance to great restaurants, which was my favorite part when my brother lived there.
Too true, unfortunately. The Post did an article recently about two women who’d been together for 30ish years, set down roots in a town about an hour south of DC, and decided to move to MD because of the new laws
If you really want to move closer to the 'rents, consider northern Virginia as an alternative to Richmond itself. It’s only 90ish miles. It’s reasonably gay-friendly. It has a completely different culture from the rest of the state - definitely not bible-belt. The job market is fairly decent. The District is also pretty gay-friendly. Southern Maryland (e.g. Charles County etc.) would be accessible to Richmond via (I think) the bridge on route 301, and the housing market is booming there but commuting to the District for work would suck, and I don’t know what the job market is like further out.
The downside to anywhere in the DC area is that the traffic is horrendous and the cost of living (housing) is insane.
Richmond actually is a decent option for retirees. There’s good access to medical care. Some cultural activities, and of course DC is a day-trip away. The weather is a bit brutal in the summer (though never as brutal, or for as long, as further south); similarly it can be miserable in the winter but not as bad or for as long as in the northeast (Though sometimes Richmond gets more snow than we DC area folks do).
Let me put in a word for Charlottesville. It is stunningly beautiful, and considers itself a little patch of Massachusetts, blessed with better weather. I don’t know what you do for a living, but that could be an issue. So could house prices. But there is a Jewish community, and it is fairly gay friendly.
It’s about an hour from Richmond. I know a lot of folks who commute to jobs there daily.
I disagree. If you’re willing to be two hours away from the folks to avoid the institutionalized homophobia of central Virginia, then add another 15 minutes to move across the river into Maryland or the District. As gay-friendly as everyone in Northern Virginia is, it’s still part of the Commonwealth and it’s still bound by the laws passed in Richmond.
Yeah, I was very mildly considering moving there a few years ago when my girlfriend at the time was thinking she might be transferred there, but then BOOM! They started passing very pointed anti-gay legislation like mad, so no way. It was like a sign from On High. And the housing price advantage started to evaporate as well. Then we broke up. So, here I am, in my blissful Domestic Partnership with my fabulous new Spousette in lovely So. CA, once again convinced of the value of following my gut. I should have known when I asked a friend of mine who used to live there about the area and she said, “Well, there are these really really beautiful little blue flowers that bloom in the spring.” And then nothing else.
Good luck whatever you decide!
Yes, another vote for Charlottesville here. I lived there for two years after undergrad before leaving last summer for school elsewhere and absolutely loved it.
Beautiful town, large enough to find most anything you need, and only an hour from Richmond and 2 hours from NOVA for anything else. Close to the Skyline Drive for outdoor recreation if your parents enjoy that type of thing.
Even though it is a smallish city, the presence of UVA gives it more cultural opportunities than many larger cities–theater, great music scene, etc. It’s certainly one of the more liberal, open-minded cities you will find in Virginia. I’m too tired to look up sites, but it is consistently ranked one of the best cities in the US to live in, and I believe some magazine last year ranked it near the top of cities to move to after retirement–great healthcare, etc.
Anyhow, BIG second on at least looking at C’ville.
I grew up in NOVA and it kind of hurts to say this but in your situation, I would avoid the Commonwealth. The laws regarding gay people are not particularly favorable. If you found a job around here, it would be best to live in Southern MD and commute. The housing prices and traffic will shock you especially if you live somewhere where the prices are traffic aren’t absolutely bat-shit crazy.
The Jewish part shouldn’t deter you, Virginia isn’t a hotbed of anti-semitism.
What’s it like to live near the coast? like the Norfolk area? I also wonder about the Delmarva peninsula- it seems a pretty quiet place…watching the peanuts grow. What are the taxes like?
Very Yuppie, very artsey/crafty, fairly expensive for the boondocks. Beautiful scenery. Bring your own job. Far from prety much everything, but no more than an couple of hours from anything either.
