You notice how all those evil manical masterminds claim they wanna take over the world? It wouldn’t be a very fun/easy job. I mean, look at the cons:
[list]
[li]Sure, you can bulid a nuclear missile with your one milliiion dollars, or kidnap all the major leaders of the world? Sure, but could you actually lead the world? Even if you were a good political leader, no one could lead/rule over the whole world efficiently.[/li][li]You could force anyone you want to be your lover. But Who would honestly want a romance if you could be killed if you ever pissed off your husband? Or the fact you enslaved/killed a couple million people?[/li][li]You would be constantly having to deal with assination attempts, dissedent citizens and the like. And, it makes it just more easier for those who want to also take over the world. He has only one person to kill and then he would be able to assume your place pretty easily compared to the old world where he would have to kill a couple hundred main leaders and then sub leaders like govenors.[/li][li]Who would want to be hated by billions of people(that is assuming the leader is tyrannical, which is what they usually are). [/li]etc.
Why not just hack into a bank, take several million and retire in the carribean?
The reason that I will take over the world - When the Stars are Right - is so that I can use all of you puny humans as playthings and snack food.
To address your points one by one:
When I control this rock, I do not need to lead you humans efficienctly. My own power will allow me control/enslave all that I want, and if your human “civilizations” fall apart, it is of little concern to me as long as I have a steady supply of your kind for my amusement.
As for “Romance” I have no need of it, and don’t care what the other party thinks of our “relationship” but a large number of Japanese schoolgirls would be nice - Hey, I am a horrible monster with tentacles.
I am powerful enough that none of your puny weapons could hurt me, and I doubt anyone could throw a coup. The only plausible threat is from other Great Old Ones, but I will just kick their butts too.
The petty concerns of you humans are totally beneath me, so that even if every one of you loathed me with all your being, I wouldn’t care. Frankly, I don’t care about you humans so much that I don’t even know why I am even writing this. Oh Well,
Because for some reason we all wish to use our extremely short lifetimes to gain power, possessions, and land on this little speck of rock (which will not exist and hasn’t existed for all that long in the grand scheme of things) in a dark corner of a backwater group of stars.
I’d force the entity known as FOX to keep making more Firefly episodes and I can watch the show on a gigantic big screen the size of the sky.
This is one of the many ridiculous projects of scale I’d force people to build. Another example would be a ray gun to fight a war with aliens that humans have never known about.
b) To ensure that your entry in your highschool yearbook outshines everyone else’s.
c) To be mean and petty to all your previous teachers/bosses/etc by closing down their schools/businesses, and then forcing them to work in the salt mines.
d) To be able to tell the Inland Revenue to shove it.
e) To solve* every problem that you want.
f) No-one else allowed to drive in front of you.
etc, etc…
Usually done with all the insight and attention to detail that you find in calls to talkback radio. For example: “They should move everyone out of Canada and build some artificial glaciers there to counter global-warming. They could pay for it with increased tourist money too…”
Yes, those are all things you could do when you have been a established leader for a while. However, the things I listed are the kind of things that would happen almost immediatly after you gain leadership(like, say a week).
The answer to all the pitfalls of world domination is to set yourself up as a type of “Big Brother.” Allthough you are evil, you make it seem to the masses that you have their best interests at heart and they are better off with you controlling every little thing they do. Then you turn the masses against each other, and implicate laws such as thought crime, or something in that nature, brainwash their children into turning in their parents, and within, say forty years, you should be set. In other words, copy 1984 by George Orwell, add a little bit of drugs to keep the masses content, as in Brave New World by Aldous Huxley, and sit back and enjoy wold domination.
It’s not the actual being in charge, but the fun of taking over against your enemies and the clueless masses that is the fun! After i take over, i’m giving it back after a few weeks, only to try again with an even crazier plan!
I’ve wondered this myself. What would have happened had Alexander the Great or Hitler been successful and expanded their empires to cover the entire world?
The thrill is in the conquest. Once it’s all conquered, what’s left?
Personally, I’d make the world a better place, according to my warped standards and daily whims of course.
Just to play devils advocate:
Pros
[ul]
[li] Power over everyone[/li][li] Complete freedom to realize any fantasy[/li][li] Finally, everything is as it should be, your way![/li][li] Thousands of butt-kissing yes-men to do all the menial work[/li][li] A holiday in your name[/li][li] Legalization of marijuana (how’d that one get in there?)[/li][li] Chicks dig power[/li][/ul]
Oh, and then there’s the little things like: enforcing the development and integration of alternate fuel using engines; abolishing money; deconstructing the much abused welfare and unemployment systems; healthcare for everyone; better education systems; etc.
Ok.
My point is though, even if you were a great leader and knew how to properly implement such ideas, how could you do it on such a grand scale as the earth? Not one human could do it. And with one leader ruling and one goverment ruling, theres bound to be plenty of corruption amoung the lower downs.
Also, I’d imagine another point for those cons are tohse james bond types always managing to get you to spill you guts.
One would be to rule with an iron fist. So long as you have heavily armed enforcers that are willing to do what you say for payment, the unwashed peasants will fall into line out of fear.
The other would be to be a loving ruler so that the masses just adore you and no rebellion can take hold because it couldn’t gather enough followers.
It’s a sad, yet true statement, that the vast majority of people will follow authority because it’s authority. Most people would rather have others make their decisions for them, and then argue over whether it was right or wrong amongst themselves.
Corruption is to be expected in any type of regime, it’s human nature, but so long as the few cannot incite the many, a little corruption isn’t to be feared. Steps can be taken to prevent such corruption, but I’ve learned that human ingenuity is at its best when it’s applied toward beating the system. In that case, examples will have to be made
