Inspired by this thread. I’ve tried to find older threads but my seach-fu isn’t quite up to snuff, so apologies if this has been done before.
I’ve read several times both on this board and others, that some people have a thing about eating out alone. Each time I’ve encountered it, my reaction is “Bwuh?”
I travel a lot, and consequently eat a lot of my meals alone, on the road, in restaurants of varying points on the snob/slob scale, and never given it a second thought. It’s a certain time of day, my metabolism needs energy, and I’m not in a position to cook. Whether I’m in a Diner or a five-star restaurant, I’m actually usually excited about my book/getting to pick a bottle of wine all for myself without having to share, the meal itself etc etc.
The only minor annoyance is when waiters/people at the next table think you want company and a chat instead of solitude and a read, but since they’re being kind it’s very hard to get annoyed.
So what gives? Is it a fear that people will think “poor poor single person?” Is it a feeling that you seem gluttonous if you order three courses? Please explain, however much YMMV.
I assume it’s because people are afraid that others will think that they’re losers who can’t get a date, SO or friend to dine out with. It’s never bothered me personally, although I rarely have occasion to go to restaurants alone anymore. I like the little oasis of solitude. I always need to bring something to read, though. I get bored stiff otherwise. I also get bugged by servers or other diners who don’t get that I actually do just want to read and not talk.
Again, something I do often. I mean, it’s not like you want someone to chat with while watching the damn thing, right? And you’d happily watch the same movie alone at home, right?
It´s an activity, outside the house, which in most cases is more fun in company than alone. Also, it´s fun to chat about the movie afterwards while everybody still remembers everything.
As for watching movies alone, at home - this usually makes me go on a multitasking spree, thus I miss most of what the movie was about.
I just need someone else being there, to help me focus on one single thing for more than 5-10 min at a time.
For me it’s not so much the eating alone but the cooking for only one’s self that I hate,
I love to cook and even had some professional training but I can’t bring myself to make anything but bachelor grub,
I love eating alone, but it has to be the kind of place that makes it worth it. Nothing is worse than going somewhere to eat alone and its too dark to read your magazine.
Absolutely true, and I’d much rather go to the movies with a friend (or a passel of friends), because it does make it more enjoyable.
But that doesn’t stop me from going on my own if I can’t find someone to go with -and it does seem that some people would rather stay home alone than go out to dinner/the movies on their own.
I went to one movie by myself in my whole life. It sucked. And I hate to eat alone. I would rather eat at my desk than sit in the work cafeteria by myself.
I’ve traveled a lot for business too, and long ago got over any feelings of weirdness in eating alone. My usual pattern is slightly different from yours, depending on the environment. I almost always eat at the bar. The bartender will give me as much or little conversation/social interaction as I want and also helps run interference should someone decide I need to be picked up.
The only time I don’t do this is if the bar is filled with heavy smokers. I’ll ask for a table then.
When I traveled for work, I actually resented it when I traveled with a team and felt obligated to eat with them. I perferred to do my own thing in my own time. My only accomodation for eating alone was to try to eat fairly early when the restaurant wasn’t too busy. I’d rather eat early anyway, so it wasn’t much of an accomodation.
Generally, I don’t mind people asking what I’m reading. I always, always, always have at least one book in my purse, and usually have two. I enjoy eating alone, WITHOUT cats mooching from me, and my husband wanting a drink. Unless I’m getting up to get myself something, he’s out of luck. I have a few places that I frequent, and the servers know me and are friendly and attentive without being obnoxious.
I think the phobia is a carryover from junior high and high school, when nobody sat alone by choice, because only complete losers couldn’t find someone, anyone, to sit with.
For me, it’s definitely a boredom issue. I’m a little on the particular side so I don’t like to drag books around with me and potentially get them dirty. That just leaves thumb twiddling and introspection during all the various waiting periods involved when eating out anywhere other than a buffet. It’s also a little off-putting because I don’t have anyone to focus on at my table, so I’m stuck trying to avoid awkwardly staring at strangers.
As long as I have something to read, I don’t mind eating by myself. I would be uncomfortable and feel conspicuous if I had nothing to read.
But I would never go to a movie alone. Single moviegoers always look lonesome and sad to me, as if they’ve been driven out of the house and couldn’t think of anywhere else to go, even though I know that’s nonsense.
I go to movies by myself, but generally not at 7 on a Friday night in the midst of a huge crowd. I tend to go during the week or matinees when I want to see a movie alone. I usually find the experience more enjoyable with fewer people in the theater anyway.
I’ll eat by myself, but once again, tend to stay away from places with a waiter/waitress when doing so. I’m not sure why, but I’m not entirely comfortable having someone wait on me when I’m alone. I tend to go to buffets or those “order at the counter” type places when I’m by myself.
This is what I would have said. I don’t have a phobia about it… I will eat alone if need be. I just don’t enjoy it. I like to read, just not at dinner. At best, I sit at the bar and watch sports on TV, which is pretty lame.
I have enjoyed many meals/movies/vacations alone. Nothing compares to being on vacation and being able to do exactly what you wanna do exactly when you want to do it.
