May I suggest TWIN BODY-POWERED DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL SHARPIE CAPS instead?
Why the need for tasting food? Or fat caps? That is for idiots, seriously.
Protein shakes, through a straw. At least three times per day. More if you are physically active.
I think that 3/4 inch glass ear gauge plugs up your nostrils every night would be righteous and most fitting.
I found that the other end of the sharpie accent pens have a much smaller in depth cap that pops out and fits in my nostrils very well and is pretty comfortable. They are a bit over 1/2 inch.
Dood, are you insane?! Do you have any idea what kind of damage that sort of power and alloy can do in the hands of a novice? If he’s really serious about this, I’d start him out on a SINGLE-BODY TITANIUM before he works up to the hardcore nostril stretchers.
Heck, get yourself a speculum and call it a day.
Better try them out for size in your ass first.
Aw geez, I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time! I love you guys! 
Given your username I can’t believe you passed up the opportunity to suggest pickles instead of marker caps.
I figured as much. Well, I live in Arizona so I don’t have a lawn to chase people off, so, get off my sand!
You sound like you are half that!!!
I’ve also heard that using safety pins to attach 10-lb weights to the end of your penis for 30 days will dramatically increase the size of your junk.
Moved from General Questions to IMHO.
samclem moderator
If these guys think it’s not possible without surgery, then it’s probably not possible without surgery.
But I suspect using tunnelswould be a better choice than marker caps, if you’re truly committed to the idea.
OP, have you split your septum yet or are you still just dickin around?
I don’t know, kid. I’m an old, fat, black guy. I already look too much like Rick Ross.
How about you try to look more like you? If you don’t like you, no one else is going to like you either. Remember, M & M (he’s an old, skinny white guy) didn’t try to be anybody but himself.
There are plenty of better, more reliable sources than this forum.
A plastic surgeon stuck up his nose! :eek:
Careful before someone busts a cap in your nose.
If you’re a white kid with a typically caucasian nose, bigger nostrils won’t give you a nice nose like Rick Ross’s. Bigger nostrils will just give you a white-person nose with big giant flappy nostrils.
If you want a nose that actually looks good with bigger nostrils, see a plastic surgeon.
Just go find Michael Jackson’s former plastic surgeon, and tell him, “Whatever you did to Michael… I want the opposite.”