Beck you weren’t recently shopping in Oklahoma? This sounds like one of your bad,bad,bad posts.
What an adventure. Walmart’s staff tried to help. I’ve looked at the pictures and can’t figure out why the chain wouldn’t come lose.
I can definitely relate. I was carrying a 30 pack of beer to the cashier at Kroger. The cardboard was damp from the display case. It fell apart just as I got in line. I had cans of beer rolling everywhere. That was not my finest moment. But I eventually got home with the beer in several plastic bags.
Weird. No, not me. I’m firmly planted in South Arkansas.
I had a similar thing happen in an elevator. My shirt tail got caught in the closing door. Nothing happened. But I had visions of my top being pulled off in an elevator full of people.
The lil’wrekker was the master of grabbing small things rolling through the grocery store. Many broken olive jars and bent cans laid in our wake. I wasn’t paying close attention one time and with one grab a whole overfull flat of apples rolled down. Apples went everywhere as the lil’wrekker clapped her hands. I didn’t go back to that grocery store for awhile.
Some years ago my wife and I were eating at a nice restaurant in town. We were seated at a table on the second floor, next to a railing that overlooked the lobby. She set her glass of wine down on the table, but she fumbled it and somehow it tumbled through the railing without making any contact. There was a second or two of pregnant silence before it fucking exploded on the lobby floor below us - the sound was somehow absurdly out of proportion for a simple glass of wine hitting the ground - and the restaurant was filled with gasps and stares. She was silent and still, embarrassed at having been the cause - and I was equally embarrassed, as I had this idea that perhaps people thought I had been smacking her around or something. It was a painful moment for both of us.
Several years later we went back to the same restaurant, and ended up seated at the exact same table - where we observed that a sheet of clear polycarbonate had been affixed to the railing to prevent such accidents from ever happening again.
My son used to like to trail his hands along the grocery shelves as he walked. One day he knocked a jar of jam on the floor and it broke. He was devastated (you know how bad little kids feel when they break something!) After that day, he never touched a thing in the store.
My brother once pretended to fondle the breast of a mannequin. As he moved his hand away he bumped the mannequin’s arm and over it went. Right into a glass table covered with watches and costume jewelry. All crumpled to the floor with a mighty crash. I left the scene and left my brother to explain what happened.
^^oh, God. Never attempt to shake a mannequins hand. My Daddy loved doing that, walking through stores. He came away with many arms. And laughed his fool head off. It was kinda his hobby. Mortified me.
