Once again, I am stunned at the utter differences between men and women. This is not just Mars and Venus, we’re talking alternative galaxies here.
A tiny mayfly got into the house last night. Now, out of the gazillion different flora and fauna in this ecological nightmare we call “Florida”, a mayfly is nothing to lose sleep over. Mrs. Bluepony observed mayfly with much alarm and demands from husband for immediate protection.
Personally the time it takes to find something to kill the bug with is probably over one half of a normal mayfly’s lifespan. Even more with Mrs. Bluepony’s Rules of Engagement for Insect Termination. Example-- Rule 1: “Thou Shalt Not Use National Geographic magazines for bug killing”. This irks me, they are the right size and weight for most bug killing. She has other rules like no current newspapers or use of her million stuffed animals. Now I know how US pilots felt in Vietnam with all the restrictions to aerial warfare placed on them.
I guess, as a last mystery to me regarding all this is the fact that Mrs. Bluepony is, along with a great wife and mother, a trained military policeman for the past ten years. She is an expert rifle and pistol shooter, plus she is a 1st-degree black belt in tae kwon do. Surely enough life experiences to deal with flying insect life.
Are there actually women out there that can kill their own bugs? This is getting to be one of life’s cosmic questions to me. Maybe they are a unique genetic offshoot of regular human females, and thus must be preserved and protected under the Federal Endangered Species Act.
Well, gotta run and find me a National Geographic…
I do not kill my own bugs because I do not kill bugs. In fact, I had considered posting a topic asking the question, do you squash or scoop? I scoop.
Bugs, whether they be flying or the 6-legged kind, don’t really bother me. (Except for cockroaches, which I have thankfully never had in my home). I pick up daddy long-legs by their legs and put them outside. I catch little moths in my hand and put them out too. All others are either left to fend for themselves against my cat (who mostly ignores them) or get scooped up in a cup and put outdoors.
The only exceptions to this are ants (which obviously cannot be scooped), wasps and houseflies. Houseflies are too fast to catch and discard, so they often do get smooshed, and wasps are just too dangerous to get near.
Here’s the trick to killing flying insects quickly and easily. Spray them with hairspray. Once it dries, their wings stick and they can’t fly off, making it infinitely easier to smoosh them.
“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” - Anne Frank
I’m a man and I’m the bug hater of the family. My teens can ignore ants roaming cracks in the bathroom tiles, or cockroaches in the drinking glasses they leave behind furniture, or pill bugs making their way across the carpet. So it’s not just women.
Well, Bluepony, I can’t answer for all women, but for myself, I regularly kill little bugs and insects. All by my lonesome, too. There is one exception to that. I do not, and WILL not, under any circumstances, unless my life is truly in danger from said critter, kill a SHUDDERSHUDDERSHUDDER roach. SHUDDER
I HATE, I ABHOR these little nasties, and I have been known to get hysterical over them. Especially when they’re fying at my head, or when, weak from surgery, I lean on the counter of the bathroom sink and one crawls on my neck… SHUDDER :eek: Okay, stop laughing at me!!! It was NOT funny!
But, I have killed a lot of other bugs, spiders, scorpions, snakes, mosquitos, flys, whatevers. Does this help you any?
You sing in my consciousness like a counterpoint to my life.
L.L.
Bluepony, I forgot to add, that I loved your story!! LOL!
Shayna, you reminded me of something. It’s true that I kill a lot of bugs, but some I never smoosh, just scoop up and take back outside, mainly crickets(good luck) and lady bugs(same). The 2ft long king snake I found in the house last spring I just took outside to the back alley and told him he wasn’t welcome inside my home, next time he’d lose his life.
I see we have another newbie joining us, so
Welcome aboard !! Wood Rehling!!
You sing in my consciousness like a counterpoint to my life.
L.L.
When you can’t quite reach the target, it’s nice to know that soapy stuff (Formula 409, Fantasik, etc.) kills a wide variety of bugs. I agree that National Geographic is one of the better weapons for close in work - PC Magazine works well, too, now that they’ve trimmed it down a bit.
If they start considering women for combat positions in the armed forces (or maybe they already are, I’m a little out of touch on the subject), the first test they should have to pass is killing a big ugly nasty cockroach. How can they expect to be able shoot at people when they go running to some man whenever a friggin’ gnat is flying around the room?
My wife is excellent at killing bugs, as long as the number of legs on the bug is six. As soon as she sees a spider, however, she flips, and I am called to duty. Usually while I’m sleeping, naturally. I’ve even offered a coupla times to carefully remove the extra pair of legs from a spider so that she’d be able to proceed with the project, but she then aimed the rolled-up magazine at my head. Same reaction when I made the observation that crabs and lobsters were essentially spiders with delusions of grandeur.
A committee is a lifeform with six or more legs and no brain.
I didn’t do bugs until my divorce, but now… no choice. My ex (rat bastard that he is) would eventually kill them, but it was like pulling teeth to get him to do it.
I learned to make him produce the remains, too, otherwise he’d just pretend.
the only bug-like critters that i have problems with are little worms, millipede-esquers and the random spider. but i think the only ones i murder on a regular basis are musquitos. but really, how do you not kill a musquito?
then there’s beetles, i LOVE beetles!! especially the metallic purple one i found last year. oh how it saddens me that he snuck away before i could take his picture.
if wishes were fishes, we could walk on the ocean.
Bluepony, I find it odd that your wife wouldn’t kill the bug. She’s a mom, you say? I thought all moms had that ability. In fact, I’m looking forward to the day when, along with the joy of motherhood, I will gain the ability to kill bugs…even spiders, as well as the ability to spit onto a tissue and use it to clean anything.
I will usually ask my husband to kill bugs. If he’s not in the room, I can do it. Unless it’s a spider. I have a paralyzing fear of them. I can’t get near them. If no one’s home, I can do it, but it’s a traumatic experience for me.
I never hate myself in the morning. I sleep till noon.
–Sig line courtesy of Wally
