So, you are only permitted in a thread if you agree with the majority opinion? So you are not permitted to offer another one.
In anycase, the OP was about women having private parts grabbed and a related tangent began when one poster said that she treated all men as potential stalkers and rapists.
That person, whoever she is, is a horrible person. Can you please quote who said that?
I’ve heard more of that from other women than I have from men.
Here’s one memorable incident from my old job, although it didn’t involve me directly. One of the technicians came in to work and was a bit crabby, and another technician kept telling her to “turn that frown upside down”. I finally told technician #2 that this was none of her business.
She didn’t say that! She doesn’t smile and greet every man who expects her to! That’s not taking every man as a potential stalker, that’s protecting herself after learning that SOME men are stalkers or just plain jerks.
The thing is, Dude, you have told us your opinion, over and over and over, in a thread where the OP specifically asked for women’s experiences. Now, I don’t object at all to men coming in here and expressing an opinion (well, maybe I object a little bit). Expressing an opinion ONCE and then reading the rest of the thread to see what others think. Your continuing to insist and push and insult, well, it reminds some of us of the very behavior we came in here to discuss.
No, I specifically said that no one deserves actual abuse. Twice. Relevant bits of my post.
If I know the person telling me to smile, it’s usually a woman. If I don’t know the person, almost always a man.
Bolding added.
kayT, please don’t tell other people where they can and can’t post.
AK84, I have gone back through to read your exchanges with Mighty_Girl. With all due respect, your continued assertion about what she said involves—in my moderating opinion—an untenable twisting of words, and it needs to stop. Additionally, as you yourself noted, it is a tangent. Do not raise this issue again.
And to other thread participants: anyone who is tempted to get in a last word on AK84 on this point is subject to the same restriction. Drop it.
I hadn’t seen Asimovian’s post. Dropping this.
You did in the post I responded to. As did Nawtha Chucka in post 70.
Ok, in the interests of trying to keep this from going into another unproductive shouting match; I’ll ask you a question and I genuinely want to understand you here so.
Could you explain what you meant by that? Because to me it seem(ed) that you were saying that since one person or more behaved appallingly, everyone with a Y-Chromosome was suspect merely for being male, irregarless of how they actually behaved.
Is that a fair analysis? If so, why do you think that is justified. If not, what did you mean when you said that.
Just saw the mod post. Ignore the above post then, as ordered.
Twice I’ve had men almost hit me with their cars while I was out walking, then offer me a ride. The first time I said “NO” and the guy drove away. The second time the driver didn’t take my answer, and tried to get me into the car.
Knowing better than to get into a stranger’s car, I immediately grabbed the fence behind me with one hand, held up my good hand, and screamed “I SAID NO!!” The guy drove off.
If a woman says NO and the man does not give up, she should do anything possible to get away from him.
Before I leave, a short note to the men who came to say they believe us, it frankly starts to feel like gas-lighting when our experiences are questioned, like a good chunk of half the population of the world is living a collective delusion. I know most of you aren’t like that – thank all the gods that may or may not exist – but we learn VERY early to be careful.
I am sorry for my sisters who’ve had it worse. I know how hard it is to speak out, especially on the internet, when it’s so easy to doubt us and insult us. I, for one, had never told anyone about the harassment because it is, frankly, incredibly humiliating. I am no prude, but some words, I thought, were better left unsaid. Now I know that not speaking about it maybe wasn’t the best thing, maybe my father, my male friends, my brother, my schoolmates, my workmates didn’t know, maybe they could have helped changed the culture, even if clearly none of them would ever do that.
The thing is, how do you go home, at 9 or 10, and tell your father than a guy on the street told you he wanted to stick his penis in your little pussy (in not so “kind” words), or worse, that he tried to touch you? How? You think you did something wrong: Were your shorts too short? Should you have smiled back at him? What did you do wrong?
Of course, nothing.
Today I am going to have a painful chat with my 11 year old daughter.
There was a thank you left out of the first paragraph. please mentally add it. 
This must be in some ways what people call, and I am not saying it to be rude, unwitting privilege. I grew up very poor and am very critical of the poor based on my observations and experiences. That’s why in a thread like this I don’t downplay the prevalence. From my perspective I believe it’s even more prevalent. I grew up watching at least once a week a neighboring woman or my own mother or child get beat by a family member or s/o. So random ass grabs don’t seem all that spectacularly rare to me at least.
I don’t get the sense people are downplaying the numbers or are belittling the experiences shared. I get the sense that people are trying to convey some sort of hope by sharing an anecdote that they aren’t predators. But here’s the thing, just like in a poor neighborhood where you obviously don’t belong, it’s not each individual that’s the danger. It’s the environment. They are obviously related non-linearly but you can’t blame people for caution. It’s sexist or racist. It’s survival. Everybody has the right to act in a way to ensure their survival if such acts biggest horror is merely the offense of someone else. That’s why I don’t care if people are offended. Being offended gives you no right to do anything to anyone. I don’t care if it it’s a word, a flag, a symbol, or refusing to smile. You don’t have the right to attack someone.
Finally, I know the lady folks think I’m at some very, very rare times inappropriate and crude. But if the events described operated in sight of me I wouldn’t have been a weak, silent, observer. I’ve been in a few score fights. It wouldn’t these tentacles to engage in another if someone is being sexually assaulted. It would help make up for those times I was too small and weak to help my mother.
The answer is yes. You walk down the street, someone’s coming the other way, you smile and nod that person in passing. Man or woman.
I don’t know how this went from sharing stories about being grabbed in the crotch without invitation to pissing back and forth about women griping about street harassment but I wish I hadn’t contributed my experience only to come back this irrelevant garbage.
Octopus, you made some dumb posts early on, but FWIW, you’re ok in my book.
What a shame this thread turned into such a mess.
My anecdotal experience is to back up raventhief. Apparently I also have resting bitch face. I’m generally courteous but apparently walking by someone with a preoccupied look is enough to have strangers (always men) shout out that I need to smile.