I’ve never gone to any length to lose weight, so in that sense I’ve never suffered from an eating disorder. However, I did go through a period of several months last winter where, for various reasons I still can’t identify, I had no appetite. It was rather disturbing, because I’m skinny to begin with, and losing more weight on top of that–well, it wasn’t pretty.
I think I’m trying to make up for it now though. I’ve gotten used to the idea that I need to eat more to gain weight, so I’ll usually try to finish a meal, regardless of how hungry I actually am. I’m very realistic about how my body looks though, and while my ideal is very light, it’s a realistic light (for me, anyways). I have enough weight on me to keep from looking anorexic. At any rate, keeping my weight down isn’t an issue for me. Keeping it up sometimes is.
I’ve never had an eating disorder or seriously dieted. I have changed my eating habits and upped my exercise in an effort to lose a few pounds. (So far, it doesn’t seem to be working, but I figure that more exercise and less beer can’t hurt, even if it isn’t helping.)
I’m 46. I’ve never dieted (although I could). I’ve never binged/purged or taken diet pills. I’ve never deliberately tried to gain weight. I saw too often people who yo-yo dieted and ended up larger than they started, so I decided early on it was best just to eat relatively sanely. I’m certainly not skinny, and I like food, but I don’t like to cook, so somehow I just stay about the same, no matter what. I have gained a bit of weight since I had my thyroid removed this summer. The doc said my levels were where they were supposed to be (and I’ve been on thyroid hormones for years), but something has changed and my clothes are just enough tighter that I notice it.
" functional non-eater" – I like that terminology.
“the weight loss wasn’t the goal or the intent. It was the side effect.”-- sometimes I feel that way too - though in truth, it’s not always unwelcome, it becomes part of the game.
“I know my triggers and I pay attention to them as well as to various sources of stress in my life. When the demon rears its head (and it’s a demon to me), then I reach out to my friends for help and support.”
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I also look to people who have a more normal outlook on ME than I do, if that can possibly make any sense to somebody who hasn’t been there. Like my husband, who will make sure to tell me when an arm is too “chickenary” or I’m just seeing somebody else in the mirror.
One thing I do is eat WITH people rather than alone. That’s my current challenge since my husband is in Boston and I am still in KC and will be for a while yet.
Edited to add: that reminds me, it’s time for a snack.
I’ve never had an eating disorder related to body image issues. I’ve never counted calories or dieted. Like some others here, I was accused of being anorexic when I was a teenager, but that’s because I’m naturally tall and thin. At the time, I was probably about 6’ and 130 pounds, but I was fairly regularly consuming a pretty shocking quantity of food (and not purging).
On the other hand, also like some others here, I do tend to not eat when I’m feeling stressed, depressed and/or lonely. I first noticed it in the early nineties, after my mom died and as my marriage ended. I think I lost about 25 pounds from just being miserable. A friend started taking me out and making me eat, which I was perfectly amenable to doing.
Since then, I think I’ve subconsciously reverted to being a ‘functional non-eater’ when I’m very unhappy for an extended period, in the inchoate hope that someone would step in and take care of me again the way my friend did back then.
I will say that when my teacher had me do that research paper, I discovered I had more in common with anorexics than I thought, as far as the way they think and feel about control and food. I have a weight range that I will allow myself to be in, and should I stray out of it, I diet. And when I diet, I have iron willpower. However, this is a fairly recent development as my metabolism has slowed down in the last couple of years. I may have been obsessed over weight issues from time to time, but not unhealthily so, IMO.
To me, there’s a difference between disordered eating and an eating disorder. I would say I did the former (as did most of the other girls I knew) but I didn’t have the latter (same).
At various times I’d crash diet, go on SlimFastUltra, etc. But only for a week or so, and I knew how unhealthy it was, and I lacked some of the other hallmarks (mostly the duration, but also the extreme dysmorphia, the intensity, and the levels of physical danger) that I believe would characterize a true eating disorder.
I’ve never had an eating disorder, but that’s only because I lack discipline.
If a genie had come along during my high school or college years and told me that I could magically be anorexic or bulimic but without the tremors, sleeplessness, or nausea that I get from not eating, I would have totally taken him up on it. I can’t function at all without eating, and I have very little “willpower.”
I’ve done about everything else that I could stand, though. Dieting, Slim-Fast shakes, generic Xenadrine, exercising at unhealthy rates, exercise videos, restricting myself to only one kind of food (cereal, soup, etc)… It’s pretty pathetic. These days, I try to stay too busy to think about my weight/be obsessed with food. That works, mostly.
Since then, I think I’ve subconsciously reverted to being a ‘functional non-eater’ when I’m very unhappy for an extended period, in the inchoate hope that someone would step in and take care of me again the way my friend did back then.
I don’t think that it’s so abnormal, not just in eating-but in life in general, to want to be taken care of sometimes. My hope is that you have somebody there when you need it so that you’re not toeing the line alone.
I’ve done about everything else that I could stand, though. Dieting, Slim-Fast shakes, generic Xenadrine, exercising at unhealthy rates, exercise videos, restricting myself to only one kind of food (cereal, soup, etc)… It’s pretty pathetic. These days, I try to stay too busy to think about my weight/be obsessed with food. That works, mostly.
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I’d get yourself to therapy, you’re under the control - as a decent shrink will tell you - of the beast. It’s not just puking your guts up and starving yourself - there are some very fine shades of grey – some of which you just described.
I’ve never had an eating disorder. In high school, I never knew any one else who did, either. I’ve never dieted. I’m not skinny nor am I fat. I have been going to the gym in my middle age for the added flexibility and strength, not for weight loss. I guess I’m painfully normal.
Never. Never been overweight. Never done anything strange to diet. Never have seen myself as fat. Most I’ve ever needed to drop was less than 15 pounds.
I did go through a stress induced period of weighing in far less than ideal…but it was stress.
I think the better question to ask here is, how many women have a healthy body image, a healthy relationship with food, and actually like their bodies the way they are? I’d fail that question, although I’ve never had an eating disorder. I obsess about food and my weight, and have since I was about 13. I know my husband loves me, and he says he likes my body, but it’s a conscious suspension of my disbelief to believe he doesn’t mind my extra 40 pounds.
I guess I had a stress-induced eating disorder for about 6 weeks when I was studying for the bar exam. I lost about 20 pounds in a matter of weeks, and survived on one packet of instant oatmeal, something at midday, and a pint of Guinness every night. I finally realized I was behaving in an incredibly self-destructive way and started eating again.
Other than that, no food issues. I try to eat healthy but don’t always succeed. More importantly, I don’t beat myself up if I overeat a bit. I think I have a pretty healthy attitude towards food.
I knew a couple of anorexic girls in college and had one friend who was bulimic for a while. That’s it.
I’ve never dieted in my life. I can’t; I just don’t have the disicipline. I usually just try to eat healthy on a regular basis. There was one year when I exercised obsessively, and that was the one time I was 100% happy with the way I looked. Right now, I’m not completely satisfied, but I’m not dissatisfied enough to do much about it. I don’t really think about it until I try something on that’s revealing around my midsection. :dubious:
I’ve had plenty of friends who dieted, but none that I would say had a disorder.
You’re probably right. The crux of the book was that it’s become normal, even a way of bonding, for girls and women to hate their bodies, and that citing the tiny percent of actual anorexics ignores the otherwise successful, smart women who exits on a broad spectrum of disordered eating. One of her biggest complaints is how time consuming and needless it all is, at least for women who really don’t medically need to lose weight. The brain power spent counting calories (and diminished through malnutrition and starvation), the money spent on nasty food, pills and endless diet books, the countless articles devoted to it that could be used for interesting articles that could actually enrich women’s minds.
