I often pronounce the word “gym” like “guime” (“grime” without the “r” sound). It comes from a *Simpsons *episode where Homer walks by a 24-hour gym. “Guime? What’s a guime?” Then as he walks in and finally figures it out, he says, “oh! A guime!”
I use the mispronounced word so often, I have other people pronouncing it that way as well.
The ironing is delicious.
Doughnuts
I live in Chicago so I have the right to call my lunch a sam’wich (samich or sangwhich is also acceptable). I’ve also called an Egg McMuffin an Eggamuffin but I got that from a guy on the radio long ago. I often use a deep Southside accent when discussing sausage (sah-sitch).
My son and I were watching Angry Beavers a couple days ago and they comedically mispronounce or over pronounce just about everything. In this episode, they called your sitting part byoo-tocks instead of buttocks so that’s our go-to right now.
Sometimes I mispronounce “double post.”
I say Kin - iffie for knife.
I’ll say “Viola!” for “Voila!” but I refuse to say “Walla” because too many people think that’s really the word. :rolleyes:
Two pieces of bread with meat and cheese between is a sammich.
When my youngest sis was still a wee one, she called the EMT’s vehicle an ambalance, and I’ll say that sometimes for giggles.
The short little guy who does Travelocity commercials is a ga-nome.
I’m sure there are more that I can’t recall at the moment.
I like to pronounce silent beginning letters, such as g-nu, k-night, mneumonic, etc. I also started saying grand pricks for grand prix because my favorite Internet show does it.
I too say “Viola!” and am frequently corrected by people who don’t get the joke.
I also say “OO-wee” instead of “oui,” because a guy in high school once asked me if I ever read “OO-wee Magazine” (“It’s like, them ladies don’t care that they ain’t got no clothes on!”) Or, I sometimes pronounce it “a-WEE,” a la Cardinal Richelieu.
With thick Southern accents:
ME: Say beau, nes-pa?
MY DAUGHTER: Oo-wee, mercy beau-coo.
ME: Say rien.
MY DAUGHTER: “Rien.”
And, like Kelly Bundy, I’m fond of “Eurethra!” as well.
Around my house we call our dog a chihow-how because we once saw a sign advertising “chihauhau puppies for sale.”
Eggplant in pyjamas instead of eggplant parmigiana
In restaurants I always look for the pricks fixy meals.
My thing is to pronounce ‘mischievous’ as ‘miss-chee-vee-us’ as in “I am devious and mischievous”.
A Podunk county I lived in loved to refer to itself as Townarea or even worse, The Townarea. I always refer to it as Townarhhea.
There is no u in mnemonic, BigT.
way too many to list.
I forgot to mention another one I got from The Simpsons: saxo-ma-phone (and sometimes the related vio-ma-lin, tuba-ma-ba, and oboe-ma-boe).
Ooh, I like that one.
Test-uh-clees.
Floridia. When I was in high school, I once babysat for a preschooler who was all excited because her grandparents were coming to visit from “Floridia”. I said, “You mean Florida.” She said, “No, Floridia!” I let it go because I don’t like to hound kids over misconceptions that don’t matter much; she’d find out when she got to school, if not before. And for all we know, “Floridia” is correct and we’re the ones who’ve been wrong all these years.
(OTOH, Ar-kan-sazz stopped being funny a long time ago.)
*You Nork *(the city and state) from the way I said it as a small child.
*Bee - uh - you - tee - full *from a way to remember how it’s spelled.
Prolly just because
“Terlet” for toilet (a la Archie Bunker) - usually only in the phrase “terlet paper,” though.
“Mercy buttercup, mon sewer” for Merci beaucoup, monsieur (got this one from a friend in high school)
“Chi hua hua” (pronounced “chye hoo-a hoo-a” for chihuahua
“snake paws” for “c’est nes pas?” (this is usually when I’ll say it the right way to the spouse, and then he’ll reply with the silly way).
No, we don’t go around speaking French all the time (or any of the time, really). Those phrases just ended up in my vocabulary somehow.
I’m sure I’ll think of more as soon as I hit Post on this.