:::singing Paul Simon:::
Can you guys stand another story? I gotta get them out while I can, I’ve pretty much already decided I’m not going back after the Christmas break. If I make it that long.
Anyways, Thursday was a bad day. I got screamed at no less than four times for the stupidest of things. Let’s see, I started the dishwasher because we were out of coffee mugs. I was informed we only run the dishwasher on Fridays. Then another chewing out because I put the truck keys back on the pegboard where they belong, just like the nice big sign in the garage says. Apparently the keys now belong in the ignition at all times. :smack:
(The truck is fixed, BTW. Apparently it did take someone with a penis reporting the problem.)
I don’t even remember the other two screaming fits. They start to run together after a while.
After screaming fit #4 I was getting upset. Boss sees I’m upset and asks the office manager why I’m upset. (Yes, he really is that stupid!) Office manager is awesome, she tells boss I have cramps. He thinks any mention of girly stuff in his earshot will cause him to grow boobs or something.
Boss then tells office manager that I called him at home and told him all these awful things about her! Boss won’t tell OM what I supposedly said about her. OM knows this is bullshit, but plays along. After a few minutes boss tells OM he was just kidding, hahahaha.
So now not only am I getting screamed at, he’s telling lies about me too. I’m so out of there, I’m only staying until Christmas so that I have money for Christmas.
You deserve a medal or something for putting up with that kind of treatment for so long!
::wild applause, standing ovation, three cheers, and all that::
Yes, Mama Chihuahua and babies are doing well. The previous owners surrendered her to animal control so they have no chance of getting her back. She was spayed during the emergency C-section, so she’ll never have to go through that again.
If anyone wants a link to the rescue, PM me and I’ll give you the name so you can see for yourself.
oh God, the story about the dog has made me cry. I hope the poor mama gets a loving new owner who knows she’s been hurt, and will treat her like a little princess.
And a Merry Christmas to all! I am seriously going to be opening presents and thinking of you, free of Scroogy McGrinchAss.
Do make it The Mother Of All Exit Interviews, and let us know.
Well, see, a penis will just know what’s wrong with a vehicle, because a penis counts as a second head. If you don’t have a penis, then you can’t understand vehicles, and any problem with a vehicle is more than likely because you’re having a fit of the vapors.
Seriously, I’m glad you’re getting out.
Now I’m picturing Mama Chihuahua in a little dress and a rhinestone tiara. Like this only sparklier.
But wouldn’t the tiara have fallen off when Mama Chihuahua rolled out of bed and she ran to the police station…?
Oh please please please, a boss like that deserves a better exit.
Go in one more time. When he screams at you, stand up, your face full of fury. March over to him and, while repeatedly jamming your finger in his chest to make the point, say;
"I. Have. Had. Enough. Enough of YOU screaming in my face over every little thing. Do you fucking think anyone deserves this shit from you? Do you think because YOU do it, it’s right? Well you’re a fucking JACKASS! You’re a BULLY and an ASSHOLE, and right now I’m going to do the same goddamned thing that everyone who ever works for you for the rest of your sorry, miserable ASSHOLISH LIFE is going to do to you.
I QUIT."
Then walk out in silence. Ignore anything that comes out of how mouth, regardless of what it is. Seriously, say nothing.
And then turn and smile right as you walk out the door, and then audibly laugh as you turn away and keep going.
Make sure you have taken home all your personal items first! 
Add me to the list of people supporting you in getting the heck out of there, Dr. Girlfriend. That’s not just a bad boss, that’s an abusive boss with a healthy dose of crazy mixed in. If you’ve been documenting all this craziness, I think you have a good shot at getting unemployment insurance.
I got fired by a boss like that. I laughed at him, stood up, and walked out into the atrium that all our offices on all our floors look out onto (no glass).
And yelled "Free at last, freeee at laaaaaast! Thank God almighty, ah’m free at last!"
The acoustics were great. The sense of satisfying closure was even better.
Yeah, I had a screamer boss too. I lasted 50 weeks in that job, since I could not afford to quit until I had another job. I gave a 1 week notice on week 49. Had I stayed the full 52 weeks, I would have been entitled to a week of vacation. It. Was. Not. Worth. It. Just over a year later, Screamer bought a truck from my husband. When my husband mentioned that I worked for him, he said he did not remember me. My first name is a diminutive of his first name.
I’m told you can’t fix Stupid, not even with duct tape. You can’t fix Crazy, either!
Thanks everyone. You have no idea how much your support means to me. 
I’m sitting here tearing up just thinking about going back there tomorrow.
I have to go back tomorrow, if only to get my sweater and coffee mug. I may not stay long though. If I have any nasty emails in my inbox I will be gone. That’s another one of the boss’s favorite tricks, he sends shitty emails after hours so we get a nice surprise in the morning.
I have to admit I’m scared to death. I won’t get unemployment insurance, I’m quite sure of that. Boss brags about how he fights every unemployment claim he gets, and that he wins every time. That’s not just him bragging either, office manager says it’s the truth. Most of the worst of the abuse is verbal, he’s careful not to put the really bad stuff in writing so it’s my word against his. All of my co-workers know what he’s doing to me but I can’t ask them to testify in my favor because then they’ll get fired.
My boyfriend says he will cover things until I’m working again, and I do have about six months worth of expenses in my savings. So there’s that at least. I know I’m taking a huge chance here but I just can’t do it anymore.
Next time you guys talk to your deity of choice, put in a good word for me please? Thanks.
Never say never - maybe your claim will be the one that makes the unemployment people realize that he’s an abusive, toxic person. Even if you don’t get it, you win by not working there any longer.
Well, that’s good, at least.
Will do. 
Go through your inbox and forward ALL of his nasty emails to a personal email account. You might want to set up a throwaway email address for this, and just use it for that purpose.
Great advice. Make sure you send the emails to yourself as attachments, not just hit the forward button. The attachment will show source information, including his IP address, if it comes to that.
I’ve got a mini-work rant. It’s about a really douchey way of using language. At work, I’m always getting asked, “So, what’s ‘the ask,’ here?”
Ummmm, the ask? You mean what are we being asked to do? Or what does the client want? Ask is NOT a verb, Douchey Mc. Doucherson.