Found out my new team leader signs off her emails with “Thank you for your patients.” Not just a one-off typo, either: all of 'em. And, she’s in charge of me. Now that I’ve trained HER on our products.
May I go cry in the bathroom now? 
Co-worker (whom I have ranted about previously) walked out today. I’d suspected he was job searching for a while, but it seems today was Q-day.
Apparently he and manager had a meeting yesterday, which, as it turns out, was about moving him out of support and into sales. Fine with me, I’ve been fed up with him for a while anyway.
However, we then had this sequence of events this morning:
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Indyellen takes a client call where co-worker should have been able to answer a very easy question a week ago, but hadn’t. I answered the call in 8 minutes, including client instruction. So, I’m annoyed.
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Indyellen goes into the Sent Mail folder for the Support account (which I manage) to copy an email, and finds a sent email from co-worker to a different co-worker. This email includes disparaging comments about the supposed ‘ease’ of creating user guides, and their general non-helpfulness, as well as comments about my supposed ‘cluelessness’ over his being pushed out. *No, numbnuts, I’m one of the people who wants you pushed out, I’m not clueless about it, trust me. *
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Indyellen calls out co-worker on being more careful about which email address personal emails should be sent from, since I can read the email; so can manager and HR.
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Indyellen steps away from desk to avoid going off on co-worker. I ended up in the manager’s office complaining and manager fills me in on this supposed transition to sales.
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Indyellen comes back to see co-worker leaving with his belongings in tow. Apparently what he was working on this morning (while not answering the phone) was his resignation letter.
So, now we’re a person short on the phones. His open tickets are having to be reassigned between the remaining two of us, plus the manager. I’m not entirely unhappy he’s gone, but it’s very chaotic.
Oh, and he told the person who was the addressee of the email to apologize to me for his hurting my feelings, and he told HR to apologize to me for leaving so abruptly. Dude, you have my cell phone number. Grow a pair and apologize yourself, asshole.
Don’t let the door hit you where nature split you.
My most darling co-worker, I truly need to tell you this. Your meltdowns are spectacular! Truly! They are a thing to behold! They are passed around amongst us support folk like manna from comic heaven!
However.
It’s getting embarassing. Quickly. You really need to stop. We all now understand why your city burns itself down every Halloween - it’s because YOU LIVE THERE! They’re as sick and tired of the dramatics as we all are. Jeez - you act like we’re torturing puppies - all we want is ONE DAMN DOCUMENT! ONE PAGE! How HARD is that?
No really. How HARD IS THAT???
Gah - I need a drink. Or ten.
Super
slm2955, you ok? tap tap
Oh dear God, yes you may! You can take my bourbon stash in with you if you’d like…
slm2955 is retarded, and incapable of normal means of communication.
Kinda heartwarming that (s)he managed to obtain employment then, what?
You sure about that?
But then again, I know a couple of restaurants that employ the mentally handicapped to bus tables, so it’s not like it’s unheard of.
Come on now Purple if it was spelled correctly she wouldn’t need your patience would she?
I might start a separate thread on it, but if anyone has advice on how to tell my own boss that she’s misspelling something *that *straightforward, I’d be happy to read it.
Did she recently come from a job in the medical field? If not I’m totally out of ideas that wouldn’t possibly get you fired.
Just to be clear though I have some GREAT ones that might get you fired.
Email to entire company:
Husbands medical update -
Hey just wanted to let you all know that he’s doing much better now “insert real information about status”
I also wanted to say a huge thank you to all of the nurses we dealt with. They have such amazing patience with all of the patients at x hospital. I really loved them all.
Thanks,
Purple,
I’m thinking this is a problem that will resolve itself in a (relatively) short period of time through embarassing feedback.
You could try Groucho Marx-style humor: “I knew it was crazy around here, but I had no idea this was the looney bin! I gotta get outta here because my patience for the patients around here is wearing thin.” cigar wag
It might actually be an honest spellcheck mistake - maybe you could make a joke about how spellcheck embarrasses you regularly.
(S)he’s posting in the workplace griping thread, isn’t (s)he? That’s the way to bet.
Well, no. I don’t give this person that much credit.
We were just kidding when we posted our job description, which said you needed to be an independent worker with the ability to follow through on your duties. Who needs that?
We did it for the big laffs at your interview when we said that we received a lot of emails, approximately 500-700 per day, and that you would need to develop your own of system of staying on top of them and organizing them. Just dump them in a New Folder and forget about 'em!
When we said you’d be trained, but you’d have to speak up if you had any questions, we obviously didn’t mean it. We prefer you seen and not heard, and we’re fine with you fumbling through your work if it means more peace and quiet for us.
And it was totally to be ignored when we said that we expected you to take ownership of your assigned duties, to make sure they ran smoothly, to foresee and prevent problems. We hate it when things deliver without a hitch. And it’s not like your work is a reflection of you or our company or anything.
You know that email where you made it the client’s problem to send you their attachments “properly” so that all you’d have to do was click Forward? That was good. They need to be set straight that you’re just a messenger. And continue writing those paragraph-long excu-- er, explanations when things go wrong. I mean, if you don’t realize you’re at fault, it’s not like you really are at fault, right?
We weren’t to be taken seriously when we said lunch breaks were 30 minutes, not one hour. Take your time, enjoy that gorgeous Southern California weather.
Ditto when we stressed the importance of filing your emails into our shared folders. Why would we need to know what’s going on with your projects when you’re out? If we do, we’ll just make stuff up.
Remember how during your interview, I said, “I’d say you can learn 75 percent of this job just by reading emails – noting what kind of requests are being made, who they’re being sent to, how they’re phrased. There’s a lot of work, but it’s repetitive” ? You clearly saw that I was spouting nonsense.
And finally, it’s totally fine that you’re sending these files to the client a day late. When all your deadlines are tight, they sort of blur together into a meaningless jumble and it all matters less and less when things deliver. We’ve all been there.
Keep up the good work! Or whatever it is you do all day.
Gorgeous Southern California weather? Doing whatever the hell you want at work? Sign me up! 
You’d get paid for it, too. Score!