I would expect to go to the break room and see a vase with stems sticking up out of it. 
I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure that’s not how records management works.
Proactive, psychic/able to duplicate yourself - tomayto, potahto.
I’ve been driving in snow for decades now (and boy, am I tired! ba-dump-chik), and I don’t drive in snow unless I absolutely have to.
Client: “Rec’d an ERROR MESSAGE when trying to {do a task}. Please remove the error message ASAP”
That’s just not how error messages work. :dubious: Even if you do put them in ALL CAPS.
Blowing and drifting snow (it’s always blowing and drifting, never one or the other) is really bad, especially when the roads are just warm enough for it to stick and freeze to the road.
Well why not? That’ll fix the problem won’t it. Just remove the damn thing.
When we were still running the accounting system on the mainframe, we wrote our programs so that if a day of the month was over 31, it would kick out an error until the accounting office said they needed those extra days and told us to remove the error message.
Late yesterday I finally, officially, blew a gasket. I work with a RonDuh, who I’ve called Velcro here many times. I was phones yesterday. One of her people called, stated she was returning Velcro’s call. I look at the case. No specific note as we’ve agreed to do. I managed to figure out she was looking for information on the other party and to see if she wanted to terminate our services.
Okay. However.
We know where the other party is and she cannot terminate our services (it’s a Federal law).
I email her, asking WTF?
Received the usual “Oopsies! [Urkel]Did I do thaaatt?[/Urkel]” response.
Listen, you moronic twat, you DID do that. You ALWAYS do that. If you’d have just LOOKED at the top of the screen, you would have seen that we know where the other party is! There was no reason to call the client at all! Saying “Supervisor is saying I have to make more contact” doesn’t mean call everyone for no fucking reason! Open your gawdamn eyes, quit staring at sparkly shiny shit and do your damn job decently enough so crap doesn’t roll downhill onto us that have to take calls like this!
I cannot talk to our supe about it, as she knows I have little to no respect for Velcro. “It must be a personal issue with her”. No, it’s not. She can be a lovely person (when she doesn’t come into office coughing phlegm all over and wondering why we’re irate with her). As a worker, though, she sucks rancid donkey nuts.
And a side rant: Coverage supervisor? YOUR damn policy is that you will let us know BY 8am if someone calls in sick. 11am is NOT 8am. The person who called in was phones. Thanks for putting us behind the 8-ball, moron. You can bet your britches that if one of us didn’t let management know we’re out by 8am, we’d get a stern talking to. I guess it’s different from your side of the table.
Guy: I need access to everything.
Me: Not happening.
Admin: Here’s a request for access to everything for Guy.
Me: (To Guy and his manager) No one has access to everything. If you truly need access to everything, please explain why and we’ll need a statement accepting the risks of this from your manager. Oh, and we’ll only do it for a very short time for a specific reason, so please let us know when to cut off this access.
Guy: I need access to everything forever.
Guy’s Manager: NO FUCKING WAY I’m signing off on that!
Guy: (emails MY manager asking for access to everything)
(After speaking to me)
My Manager: That would be a NO.
Is this a recurring event? I’m nearly certain I’ve seen this before.
Yup. Chimera is constantly dealing with people who don’t seem to grasp the concept that his position exists for a REASON. Usually it’s just improperly ignoring the protocols for obtaining access to a database or two, but once in a while, there’s someone who wants the keys to the entire system.
AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!
You are the worst combination of thick headed, lazy, and STUPID I have ever seen.
I have gone 7 months without a cigarette but working with you is going to make me start chain smoking
^^ Details and/or gossip plz?
Seanette, I work for one of the 50 largest companies in the USA, and this happens about once every 3-4 months. The database system for which I am one of the gatekeepers has a ludicrously large amount of data cutting clear across the entire enterprise. NO ONE has any damned business having access to every fucking piece of it. When we explain the size and scope of the system, people generally get the clue that they’re asking for too much. This guy isn’t getting it. As of this morning he is still insisting that he needs it. I expect his next step will be to go to my bosses boss, and our answer will not change.
Client: “Do we not have a special in-process report for [special case which accounts for less than 0.1% of materials, and not even products at that]?”
A: Nope, you never asked for one and said “no” when I asked whether you wanted the form to include the details only those materials need.
I sometimes wonder how do these people manage to breathe and stand at the same time.
The anti work gripe, or “not every old employee ends up in jail.”
Former employee is competing in Sochi, did very, very well.
oops, wrong thread. n/m…
That sounds cool! Pics?
I think a friend has pics. But look for 'em over in the Febrants thread (really not Workplace related).
(After we get those red and yellow ‘Kodachrome’ boxes of slides back from Kodak… Remember, we’re old!)
Friday morning me & 2 others from my department were demoted to the call center and had our pay cut 15% due to business needs, not our individual performance (we were explicitly told it was more or less random). Oh, and the call center had idea we were coming or what to do with us or how our exactly our training is going to work. Granted I suppose a Friday morningI demotion isn’t as bad as a Friday afternoon lay off, but I still updated my resume and started filling out applications this weekend. Oh, and the exact same business needs requiring more CSRs are increasing our department to the breaking point (which is why we’ve been working 6 day weeks).
No! Don’t let the bastards win! Your health is more important than letting the idiots drag you down.
Crap - that’s a whole lotta bad. Getting your resume out there sounds like a very good plan.
Dispatcher,
Federal DOT hours of service laws are a good thing. They keep everyone safe. They’re fairly complex, but I keep track of my hours and keep you apprised of my status when I see a conflict on the horizon. Don’t argue with me, don’t tell me I’m wrong. I know for a fact your schedule will place me in violation at 2pm Wednesday. I told you how to swap one working day to avoid that and keep me working all week instead of sitting on my ass while I reset. I tried to explain it every way I know how. I sketched a calendar and emailed it to you. If you would log into the computer and check my status you would see - and if you’re answering your office phone I know you’re at the keyboard. Still you insist I’m wrong and you’re right, and Wednesday morning when the computer agrees with me that I only have 10 hours to complete 14 hours of work you’ll act like it’s my fault. So fuck you.