I could tell you this, but I’d be lying through my teeth.
It never ends.
No Princess Entitlement. You cannot have my cell phone number so you can call me directly instead of the help desk.
Dear Administrative Assistant.
The words is **FISCAL. FISCAL **year. Not physical year.
Also not Tye-nell-oll.
Also please we need a bell for around your neck, you just came up behind me and started talking while I was posting this!
Well, I just ran into my first incident of ‘one bad apple fucks it up for everyone else’.
I have a coworker (now known as Fuckup) who comes in anywhere from 8am-12pm (usually around 11am, but he’s been trying to play nice lately because boss is Not Happy). Our office hours are in the 9-5:30 range. I say in that range, because someone’s always here during that time. We’ve been puttering along perfectly fine with our vague rules because everyone understands that a little bit of flex time is okay, but coming in hours late is just flaunting the rules.
Fuckup pulls shit like showing up at 11am and leaving right after boss leaves around 6pm, thus falsifying hours. He takes breaks at random times, sometimes prioritizing his break before a client (hint: if something is Broken with a capital B, it comes first).
So boss pulled out the labour laws in an office meeting because talking to Fuckup individually wasn’t helping. When Fuckup is on the job, he’s great at what he does, but he needs to learn the rules.
–
Okay, so in the middle of typing this boss came over and said it’s all good for me and I’m a superstar and just carry on with my schedule as it was, so I’m not so angry anymore. But in a larger company where the boss wouldn’t have time to deal with us individually it could have ended up differently.
Also, I feel bad for our intern, her second day here and she gets to witness boss putting the smackdown on.
Breakroom: microwaved steamed asparagus? Really?!? I’m happy for you that you’re eating all healthy and shit, but nuked asparagus?
Next time, just warm up some old tuna salad. It’ll smell better.
Based on the “If it was me, I’d like to be told” rule, “flaunting” probably isn’t the word you were looking for there - I think you meant “flouting.” “Flaunting” means he was waving them around and going “WOOHOOO!” 
Unfortunately, he probably will ruin it for everyone eventually.
Well, he would show up late with a cup of Timmy Ho’s and then go for lunch an hour later…I’d take that as flaunting. 
Not gonna argue that with you.
We have one of those, and Princess is making the rest of us BATSHIT CRAZY. Not even two weeks ago, we had a department meeting to specifically address start times, leaving times, lunch hours, no overtime, etc. - basic first-day-on-the-job HR stuff that was reiterated to the entire team even though there is really only one of us who is a known violator - but of course Princess missed the meeting because she was late. The question of “flex time” also came up and we were all told that our department does not have flexible scheduling. And yet Princess is only in the office on time (i.e., by 9am instead of her usual 10:30 or so) when she needs to “adjust” her schedule so that she can leave early on random days of the week, and our Director was allegedly told that the “no overtime” mandate overrides the “no flex time” policy, so if someone has their 40 hours by 10am on a Friday, they’re allowed to leave when their time is served. She’s out until next Tuesday but didn’t tell her Supervisor until 1:30 today, when she hit her time for the week and peaced out - apparently she “cleared” her scheduling with a Manager to whom she no longer reports, but with whom she has a personal outside-the-office relationship (i.e., Manager got Princess the job) which is most definitely a conflict. Our Director (and our HR Department, frankly) is well-known for taking the “ignore the problem until it goes away” approach to handling personnel matters. Now the rest of us have to cover for her for 3½ days and nobody even knew she was going to be out except the Manager who technically did not have the authority to OK the time off request, and of course Manager “forgot” to tell anyone because she was “so busy with other projects” (which is code for “playing on Facebook right out in the open where Og and everybody can see it because she is dumber than a sack of wet mice”).
I only have one question.
How dumb is a sack of wet mice and is it substatially dumber than dry and/or unsacked mice?
(That’s a new one and the visual made me :D)
WP Griping:
Was out of work for almost two weeks, tending to family sickness/death. Come back to work and two weeks worth of work is sitting/scattered/piled all over my desk. Gee thanks a lot my fellow co-workers. I’ll be sure to remember that when YOU have to go sit at the hospital for a week with YOUR family member and then arrange their funeral and bury them.
I think they’re dumber than dry ones because they managed to get themselves all wet. Just a theory.
Sorry to hear that, Lorski.
I think Lorski is entitled to smack his co-workers with said sack of wet mice. Bonus points if there’s a couple of possums in there, too.
D’oh! I did that one wrong - she is dumb as a sack of hair, and as sharp as a sack of wet mice. Which effectively amounts to the same thing, but STILL.
Hmmm think I will set out some traps…
The 'possums should be out, so they can apply their sharp, pointy teeth to the appropriate quarters.
When your doctor arrives 5 minutes late for your appointment, holding a book clearly marked “Death Certificates” and apologises that she was delayed because of an emergency, the acceptable response is not “I think the living should come first doc”.
:eek: wow..
No, it should be “God, I hope that’s not for me.”
Technically the living did come first as one must first be alive in order to be dead.
If only my inner smartass were faster than my urge to be the doctor for one second to smack that person with the Death Certificate book.