“touch base with…” huh, am I playing baseball here?
I had an interview not long ago, the owman asked me something about “best pratices”. I said, I’m not familiar with that latest buzzword, what does it mean?
She looked around at the other interviewers lost, and one woke up and said, “What do you think it means”. I love it when they ask questions with terms they don’t understand.
TLA - three-letter acronyms
You know I was going to mention all of the oil industry jargon we use but Ringo beat me to it. My company even has a page on the internal company web pages just to list all the abbreviations, terms and acronyms we use. You can even add to it if you find a new one.
Opportunity as in, “it looks like meeting your transaction goal was the real opportunity last week”, when what you really mean is “you didn’t make your goal last week”.
Partner as in “make sure you make the Regional Sales Manager a partner in that”, which means “tell the RSM what you did”.
Oh, and my store manager is no longer a Customer Satisfaction Manager, she is now a Customer Sales Manager. The reason for the change? We have mastered customer satisfaction…now we need to get more money out of the customer.
Optimizing resources for laying off and firing people. 
Well, I often hear co-workers threatening to “status” someone when they mean to suggest that they’ll give the other person more information once it becomes available.
“Verbing weirds words.” -Calvin