world shattering, awe inspirring response

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I get the SFGate news letter each day:

Several days ago it asked me this:

If you could be entirely covered head to toe in one particular substance or material, what would it be and why the hell haven’t you tried it yet and why don’t you tell someone all about it? Email the Fix’s lone creator/writer, Mark Morford, at rningfix@sfgate.com

Now I have been obsessed with coming up with a world shattering, awe inspirring response. So this is what I have come up with: NOTHING ! This sucks. Please help me and feel free to also send it to Mark. Tell him it is from me.

2

Eyes, ears, nose, mouth and reproductive organ covered too, in the key areas?

If not, I’ll go with radioactive goo. Those would be some interesting times. For the week I’d live.

3

Cheez Whiz

4

Air.

5

iampunha: “…entirely covered…”
yall: “…and why the hell haven’t you tried it yet…” AND
“…and why don’t you tell someone all about it?”
AndrewT: “…what would it be…”, not what is it! Or are u an amonia breathing alien? If u r, I’m telling ashcroft.

6

Money. Duh.

7

Don’t know how awe-inspiring these are but I’d give them a shot:

Winona Ryder’s saliva
Chocolate syrup
Fire (only when I tired of everything else)
Gold dust
Pancakes

8

bacon grease of course.

9

Naked Victoria’s Secret models!

10

I knew a girl once who would have replied instantly, “Jello. What else?” Its a long story that I’d rather not get into.

11

Regardless of the backstory, I think that girl would be right. The thought of belly-flopping into a pool of Jello inspires severe intrigue.

12

A 1953 Montrachet.

13

A 1953 Jaguar.

14

A 1953 Jaguar.

No, seriously. I’d like to do one of those Grass Suits. Take a suit, or more simply, a sweat suit, and coat it with spray-on glue. Then sprinkle on grass seed. After the glue dries, wet the suit with a weak fertilizer solution. Keep it wet and lighted for a few days, and you’ve got a green frilly suit. After a week, guys with weed eaters will be following you. After another week, the whole thing will rot and die, but what a fashion statement !