The first year that I knew my stepmother, for Christmas she gave me a bra, not just any bra, it was size 36B (I wear 48DD) :D. Not only was it the wrong size but it had lace, pearls and ribbon roses all over it, so it was also impractal . As a gift from my husband I could understand, but from my step mother ? I know it’s the thought that counts, but I can’t imagine what she was thinking.
Ooh, lemme tell ya. It was a stuffed frog.
A stuffed frog dressed like Santa.
A stuffed frog in a Santa suit that played MUSIC! Five different tunes to be exact.
From my kids? Nooo, that would have been alright. From my mom? Nooo, she’s crazy so it would not have suprised me much. It was from my (now ex) husband! And it was the only thing he got me that year, seeing as he had spent all his dough on other stuff (like alcohol). It was the first thing on the burn pile when we divorced.
but my friend who was 18-19 at the time got socks…a pair of socks.
His 17-18 year old sister got a brand new 150cc Honda Scooter (and helmet).
I don’t know if they even TRIED to justify that one…
A Madonna tape. I hate Madonna, always have, always will. Got it from The Man Whom I Have to Call Dad for Biological Reasons the first Christmas after Mamma O and he divorced.
“It’s the thought that counts,” he said.
“Well, that assumes you actually thought about this,” I shot back.
Next year he gave me $150 for my school trip to England. That made up for it.
I worked as a car salesman once and the owner gave us 19th century dollar pieces in a plastic case. We were all like “what the fuck is THIS??”
As a kid, it was nice of these people to do this, but the parents of my half-brother-in law gave be a soap set . . with the soaps shaped like basketballs. Not exactly tops of an 8 year olds Christmas list!
My grandmother once gave me used socks.
But that’s not so bad. She gave my sister used underwear.
This gets highly scatological. I’m not sure what the curse word policy is around here, so I guess I’ll let the filter do its job.
One year my friend and his wife gave me shit. Lots of shit. They gave me a box of candy labeled Assorted Darks and Lights and when opened up, revealed candy made into all types of turd shapes, from squishy to hardened, alternatingly dark & light colored.
Another gift was made to look like an easter box, with a note attached to it saying “I didn’t have time to shop this year, so I thought I’d make you something MYSELF!” Inside was a huge turd neatly arranged on plastic green shavings.
They also gave me a Shit List, detailing with minute accuracy the many forms and textures of shit, complete with descriptions of smells and their elemental makeups. It covered what various animal species (dog, cow, bird) could capably shit. Ths Shit List was actually a pretty detailed piece of research.
The worst gift I ever received was from my sister-in-law. She bought me a pink make-up bag (with flowers on it!) and a matching coin purse! God-awful ugly. She was giving everyone else really nice gifts (sweaters, kitchen stuff, pampered chef stuff, etc.) and she gets me a make-up bag. And her I bought her and my brother two matching touch lamps (that cost me $40!) and and I gave them both a K-State sweatshirt. I usually give them both $20 now… why bother!
I know it’s the thought that counts but a f**king make-up bag. :mad:
I think the worst Christmas gift I ever got was when I opened up the present Dad had got me and there was a subpeona. Well, HE thought it was pretty funny.
A small Coca-Cola polar bear from Hardees. :eek:
What did I get him, you ask? A shirt, a CD, a coffee thermos for his car, and a gift certificate for a restaurant.
I got a stuffed polar bear from a fast food joint.
I never could decide what upset me more.
1.) The fact that he paid $1.99 for it with the purchase of a combo meal.
2.) The fact that there was no thought behind it.
Needless to say, that was our last Christmas together.
Syl
A small Coca-Cola polar bear from Hardees. :eek:
What did I get him, you ask? A shirt, a CD, a coffee thermos for his car, and a gift certificate for a restaurant.
I got a stuffed polar bear from a fast food joint.
I never could decide what upset me more.
1.) The fact that he paid $1.99 for it with the purchase of a combo meal.
2.) The fact that there was no thought behind it.
Needless to say, that was our last Christmas together.
Syl
I don’t suppose you asked how the combo meal was before throwing him out.
At Christmas, the adults in my husband’s extended family all draw names so that each of us buys (and receives) only one present. (We all buy gifts for all the kids.)
A few years ago, my brother-in-law drew may name. His gift (to me) was labelled “To Spouse of YWalker and YWalker.” Since my husband’s name was first on the label, the person handing out gifts assumed it was for him, so he got to open the gift. It was a book on civil war history, which husband is very interested in. (I am not.) So, not only was “my” gift something I’m not at all interested in, I didn’t even get to open the friggin’ present. Yup, it was the thought that counted, all right.
No, but I was secretly hoping Santa would leave a good case of food poisoning in his stocking. 
If there was a combo meal in his stocking, that probably would have sufficed.
Now that Hardee’s is out of business, that should take care of the polar bear problem. Unfortunately, Burger King got the contract for some Lord of The Rings mugs recently.
[hijack] Hardees is out of business? Did this happen today? After 7:15 am when I went there and had a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit with some of those little round potato thingies?[/hijack]
[hijack] Hardees is out of business? Did this happen today? After 7:15 am when I went there and had a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit with some of those little round potato thingies?[/hijack]
sorry for the double post. puter said the post didn’t go through so I resent and guess what? both of em went. :rolleyes:
I had best not find one with my name on it under the tree on Christmas morning, or currect B/F will find himself on the curb. 
And I’ll keep his present and wear it myself!!
Actually, I think I know what I’m getting this year. And unless he got it out of a gumball machine or a cracker jack box, we’ll be good to go…
Syl
When I was about 14 years old, my older brother (about 21) bought me a plastic model of the human ear. It was anatomically correct, with appropriately colored pieces of plastic for the internal workings and the outside was clear plastic. But as a Christmas present? I would have preferred the Hardees meal and present instead of that.