I love how the holidays are always early or late. They’re never on time! 
(But this year is wicked early…)
The beauty (?) of a lunisolar calendar.
I’m so very glad that this thread isn’t about some new nasty anti-Semitic Jack Chick tract…
My best wishes for a Shana Tova to all of my fellow Dopers as well. (5774, for those of you keeping count)
Whenever I lose track of a holiday, I blame my misprinted calendar.
Happy whatsis.
Happy New Year! And yeah, it’s really early this year. I didn’t realize until last week.
Poor lad could be forgiven for not knowing, considering the holiday isn’t even on her Birthday.
My mom just called to wish me a happy new year. I was about to call. Honest. Darn.
I feel your pain.
My dad called me to be a jerk about my idiot brother who wants my respect despite his failure to move out, complete any sort of college degree even after attending college for over fifteen years, find a decent paying job, embrace of rather sexist orthodox Judaism and belief that my happy 19 year old marriage to someone who isn’t Jewish is deeply offensive even though he himself is 39 and yet to sustain any sort of relationship that lasted more than a month. Screw the holidays. I don’t want anything to do with him and I resent the emotional blackmail attempt.
Want to trade? Please?
Well, not quite never. From your link (interesting, thanks):
“The reason Chanukah-before-Thanksgiving occurred in the past, and with decreasing frequency as time went on, is because there is a slow drift between the Hebrew Calendar and the secular (Gregorian) calendar. That drift amounts to one day every 217 years. So in about 80,000 years it will drift by one full year and we’ll be back to where we started. At that time we will once again be lighting Chanukah candles at our Thanksgiving dinner.”
It’s an anti-semitic joke. There’s a difference between “funny” and “supposed to be funny”.
Once my brother asked me if I was still circumcised. I think it was when I told him that if God wanted me to attend High Holiday services, He wouldn’t give me anxiety attacks in crowded places.
To celebrate the New Year, I’ll refrain from eating a bacon cheeseburger today.
Well done. 
L’shana tova and gut yontif to all my fellow Hebrews and Shebrews!
Nope. But you are now the current leader of the Worst.Jew.Ever. thread.
Mazel Tov!
No, my father is.
He’s mad at me because I told him that Idiot Brother should help far more around the house. IB lives with him and does not pay any rent and apparently doesn’t even help my father around the house very much. Dad was whining to me about his cleaning lady. He then said that he wished I lived closer so I could help him. That’s right me. Not the son who lives with him and apparently does minimal if any chores. No. The daughter who holds down a full time job, watches two little kids and writes professionally in her spare time. It’s not enough I clean my own home. I should go and clean up after him and my adult brother as well. He was furious when I him exactly what I thought of that notion.
Sexist fuckers both of them.
Actually I think of it more as a pro-semitic joke. One culture in the world that actually teaches their kids the skills they need to budget and handle money is not something to be ashamed of.
I had assumed it was joke about not using money and not starting a fire on this day.
QuickSilver… Dude… I know less about Judaism than anyone on this Board. I can’t say anything about that.
I have seen you battle & fight for 20 straight posts to try to educate someone in The Pit with an ignorant opinion though, and I don’t remember you ever truly giving up.
I can’t say if there is a God… or if there is whether he’d say you were a good Jew.
But if there is a God, and he scorns you given how hard you try? Dude, then that can’t be much of a Supreme Being.
“You know, Mr. Ruth? I’m not so sure you should worry about that whole Cooperstown “Hall of Fame” thing. Just between you and me? I think people will know…”
You are not the worst Jew ever…You feel guilty about forgetting. You see…You’re feeling it.
[QUOTE=Moonlitherial]
Actually I think of it more as a pro-semitic joke. One culture in the world that actually teaches their kids the skills they need to budget and handle money is not something to be ashamed of.
[/QUOTE]
Good going, Moon. You managed to slip another anti-semitic comment in there. Helping to perpetuate the stereotypes that Jews worship money and are trained by their parents in handling money is hardly very far from the stereotypes that Jews practice shady business tactics to make money and Jews own all the banks and media. That is hardly “pro-semitic.”
[QUOTE=clairobscur]
I had assumed it was joke about not using money and not starting a fire on this day.
[/QUOTE]
No, it was a “joke” about Jews being cheap. True, observant Jews don’t handle money or start fires on the Sabbath. But that starts at sunset on Fridays and ends on sunset on Saturday. On Rosh Hashonah, we’re supposed to fast and go to temple is all.