Worst piece of dialogue in a movie?

[kaylasdad99]

I think I may have seen a candidate last Monday night, oh The Wonderful World of Disney, so long as it isn’t disqualified on account of not being a theatrical release:

Meg Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Dr. Jack Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Calvin O’Keefe: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Red-eyed guy: “Check this out, Charles Wallace!”

Meg Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Dr. Jack Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Calvin O’Keefe: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Red-eyed guy: “Hey, Charles Wallace, watch this!”

Meg Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Dr. Jack Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Calvin O’Keefe: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Meg Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Dr. Jack Murry: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Calvin O’Keefe: “Don’t listen to him, Charles Wallace!”

Repeat ad nauseum. On second thought, don’t. It was bad enough in the movie.

[akohl]

Con Air

Nicolas Cage is a “good convict”, a fact that he has to hide from the “bad convicts”. The head baddie finds out that Cage has been holding on to a bunny doll to give to his daughter when he gets out. He seizes the doll, points a gun to its head and says:

“One wrong move and the bunny gets it”

[Wasabee]

@akohl

Con Air

Nicolas Cage is a “good convict”, a fact that he has to hide from the “bad convicts”. The head baddie finds out that Cage has been holding on to a bunny doll to give to his daughter when he gets out. He seizes the doll, points a gun to its head and says:

“One wrong move and the bunny gets it”

“Put the bunny back in the box.”

[capacitor]

@dotchan

Dagger of Kamui. It tried to be a good movie, it really did, but it was so over-the-top that I just couldn’t take it seriously. And it didn’t help that they made no real effort to show Kamui’s transition into a totally alien world (the U.S.). Everyone, including the Native Americans, spoke Japanese. :rolleyes:

The clincher was when Kamui met a stranger who introduced himself in perfect Japanese…

“Watakushi wa Mark Twain desu.” (I am Mark Twain.)

The entire theatre burst out in uncontrollable laughter.

Mark Twain did travel the Pacific Ocean, and did the ocean and the people who live off the ocean it honor with his writings. he did it in a time when anti-Asian sentiment in America was peaking. The Japanese in turn honors Twain as the greatest of American writers.

Many manga and anime has some of either Twain-influenced humor or plot points.

[JThunder]

@dalovindj

“How could the same shit happen to the same guy twice?”

Die Hard II sucked balls.

Dude, there’s a reason why they included that line. If you’re going to introduce something that’s utterly implausible, then the writers should at least acknowledge how implausible it is. That’s precisely what the writers of Die Hard II did with that one line.

In other words, that line itself wasn’t a case of bad writing. Rather, it was a case of using good storytelling technique to make an implausible situation seem somewhat more sensible.

[Rilchiam]

@Revtim

You really might be on to something there. Has there ever been a post-apocolyptic movie spoof? I can’t think of any. Could be an area rich with satire possibilites.

I submit Radioactive Dreams. View at your own risk.

[dalovindj]

Dude, there’s a reason why they included that line. If you’re going to introduce something that’s utterly implausible, then the writers should at least acknowledge how implausible it is. That’s precisely what the writers of Die Hard II did with that one line.

That’s what they were trying to do. I get it. It’s just not funny, and it is surrounded by an utter piece of crap of a film that makes the line feel less like a nod and more like an attempt to act like the general suckitude was intentional and, therefore, funny (but only in the minds of the holywood hacks who wrote the god-awful script). It wasn’t a great self-depricating one-liner, it was a miserable apology dressed up as an excuse wrapped in a condescending “your-gonna-watch-it-ayway” outlook. Fuck them. I want my 2 hours back.

Oh, and the words “good storytelling technique” should never be invoked when the subject of discussion iis Die Hard II, unless of course you are using it as an example of what isn’t . . .

DaLovin’ Dj

[Trunk]

“We used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home. They’re not much bigger than two meters.”

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”

Lifetime achievement award to Robin Williams. Here’s a sampling. . .

“Sucking all the marrow out of life doesn’t mean choking on the bone.”

“What do I want to be when I grow up? Alive.”

“You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person I’ll guarantee you’ll win.”

"If we’re going to fight a disease, let’s fight one of the most terrible diseases of all, indifference. "

[note to people who nominate anything James Bond or Arnold Schwarzenegger said. . .oh never mind, if you don’t get it by now. . . ]

[HPL]

@SPOOFE

The only flaw in an otherwise-wonderful Reservoir Dogs… during the opening coffee scene, where Mr. Brown is trying to talk about big dicks and gets distracted, he tries to get on track by saying:

“What the fuck was I talking about?”

As written, the line seems fine. However, the delivery in that scene was nothing short of awkward and jarring. I wonder how Quentin himself managed to muck that so poorly.

I think there’s a reason that Taretino rarely acts, and I don’t think it has anything to do with being too busy. I think he realizes that he’s not a good actor and sticks to directing.

[HPL]

@Wasabee

“Put the bunny back in the box.”

I know this is probably to make me unpopular, but I thought that was one of the best lines in the movie. Sure it was corny, but so was the film.

Even now, I use it as a catch phrase with my friends at times.

[HPL]

@Lumpy

Was Hell comes to Frogtown a spoof, or just very very bad?

The Latter, I’m sure.

[MaxTheVool]

@jackelope

Return of the Jedi. The rebels are in that base-thing on Endor, and the Imperial cops come running in pointing guns at them. One of the Imperial cops points his gun at Han and says, “You rebel scum.”

It looks OK written out, but even at age 9, seeing it in the theater, I thought, “Now THERE’S a line that just didn’t come out right…” The guy who said it gave it the most lame, poorly inflected delivery I’ve ever heard.

Are you kidding? I love that guy.

Different strokes, I guess…

[murky]

*“Its a killing machine, designed for one thing” *
no. shit.

[spectrum]

@Sam Stone

I haven’t seen the movie (thank god), but I saw a clip of a scene in Gigli where what’s-her-name seduces Ben Affleck by lying back, spreading her legs, and saying, “Gobble, gobble!”. How sexy.

You know, this is the first movie that my signifigant other and I saw as a couple. We went to make fun of it. So at Christmas, he gives me a Gigli poster and a copy of the DVD, having determined that it was now “our movie.” Why wasn’t the first movie we saw together as friends (can’t remember what it was, but it had to be better than Gigli) our movie? God only know.