Worst Song Lyrics

I think in some cases, lyrics are judged according to context in addition to intrinsic merit.

The line Oasis’ Champagne Supernova is actually a nice piece of evocative imagery on its own, but when you have to judge it in the context of Oasis’ boundless arrogance, it’s easy to take the lyrics at face value and denigrate them.

I actually love that LaToya Jackson line, but then I have to think, “LaToya. Blech.”

And Love Hurts may be pretty stupid on its own, but as of several months ago, when I saw it accompany the image of feckless Bobby Hill struggling through his Deli-induced gout to meet his girlfriend at the dance, it will always have a certain hilarious poignancy for me.

There is NO song more reptitive than Grand Funk Railroad’s “I’m Your Captain”…

“I’m getting closer to my home” – 24x, in a row!!!

So, “Ah, mater” makes sense? :dubious:

Ellen, it’s a play on words. “Ah, mater (mother), want cha to always love me.” It’s not supposed to be deep. As Paul would say, “It’s just a wee songie, innit?”

Three Dog Night’s “Easy To Be Hard”:

“…And especially people
Who care about strangers
Who care about evil
And social injustice…”

I’m sorry–anybody who shoehorns “social injustice” into a song, even if it *was *the 60’s, is just trying *too *hard.

That was the fault of Galt McDermot, who wrote that song for the musical “Hair.” And yes, he was trying too hard. Way too hard.

“Don’t ask him what an assy-thingummy is, he’s only longing to be asked.” --C.S. Lewis, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (sorry)

I counted those too! Then I considered shooting myself, or at least avoiding that song for the rest of my life.

I’m only writing to thank Nametag for posting Bree Sharp’s “David Duchovny.” I haven’t heard that in years. You made my morning, I’m laughing so hard.

ETA: Is it after 12 already? Dammit, I mean my afternoon.

I always thought that Shakira had the prize for the worst lyrics…

lucky that my breasts are small and humble,
so you don’t confuse them with mountains

W T F :smack:

Si

Stan Bush - The Touch (from the Transformers animated movie)

A couple of highlights:

After all is said and done
You’ve never walked, you’ve never run,
You’re a winner

When all hell’s breakin’ loose
You’ll be riding the eye of the storm

Bill Withers - Ain’t No Sunshine

26! Beat that!

I think that’s probably “right in the eye of the storm,” which is cliche but much less stupid.

True… but at least with Withers’ song, he says them really fast. The entire “I know” marathon lasts about 20 seconds.

GFR’s last about 4 minutes…

Granted, we’re only talking about 3 minutes and 40 seconds, but still… :slight_smile:

You’re probably right, but “You’ve never walked, you’ve never run…” What do winners do, sashay?

I’m pretty sure I once counted the “Na’s” in Hey Jude and the “Do-do-do-do-doots” in Suite: Judy Blue Eyes … but I do not remember the total.

And “Mater” is also being used as a form of address, so it should be capped as well. If nothing else, this thoroughly explains the “Ah, Mater” part. The rest of it is still nonsense.

The All-American Rejects - It Ends Tonight

“When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.”

When does it end, exactly?

Hip Hop’s been doing that a lot lately. However, maybe it’s OK if you’re rhyming “Magnum” (a gun) with “Magnum” (a car); I’m not sure.

Is that from “Whenever, Wherever”, or a translation from “Suerte”? Because it sounds cool in Spanish. (If it’s from “Suerte”, then I don’t think that “and humble” belongs in there, but mi espanol no es bueno.)

Am I being whooshed here, or do you not know what a rhyme is?

Okay. I went back and listened to the song and counted. He only repeats the phrase “Love a rainy night” a paltry 30 times. You think that’s “kinda” repetitive? The song’s only 3:11 long, and it has an instrumental bridge? He repeats one line thirty times? That’s some seriously bad writing there.