Yeah, but that’s clearly intentional. It also sounds to me a bit mechanical/artificial, so I wonder if it was sampled and pitch-bent or something after the fact.
Madonna’s American Pie. I was in a (male) gay bar, and when someone played it, a bunch of gay men were screaming TURN IT OFF!
Ooo, that’s a good one. I like Madonna, and I’m actually not a huge fan of the original song, but she just sucks all the soul out of it. What a bland, bland performance. For something that’s technically fine (no crazy off-key singing, in time, etc.), it’s a good contender for worst performance. I remember thinking that the first time I heard it. I’ve also felt that way about Phil Collins’ “True Colors,” but he at least does seem to be making an effort to try and be sincere. Madonna just sounds bored and like she’s just singing it to collect a paycheck.
That’s a very good point. I’d argue the “soulless yet competent” are actually morally worse than the “deluded and talentless”.
Came here to mention that.
Anyone here like Barry Manilow’s “I Write the Songs”? (brings tears of dew-laden wonder to my eyes)
I think Tony Roletti was having a rough night with it, here.
When that song came out, radio stations were bombarded with requests to NOT play it. :rolleyes:
For overall poor singing in a major artist, I would go with Kris Kristofferson. Listen to any live performance of his -he sounds like he might actually be tone deaf. Sometimes he doesn’t even try to stay in key, but just sings in a gravelly monotone where the notes sometimes pass through the right key while on their way to somewhere else.
Great songwriter, though.
Bob Dylan deserves a mention, although his brand of badness is so unique to him it almost sounds right. In concert he can be either pretty good, or completely dreadful. We saw him live once and it was so bad we started amusing ourselves by trying to guess which of his songs he was trying to sing. And that was a difficult game.
There’s a few Neil Young songs that could fit here, but this is the worst. It’s also glorious, and wouldn’t work as well on the album any other way.
Ok, who remembers “Hands Across America”, back in 1980-something? The following week, David Letterman was talking about it in his monologue. He mentioned the NYC gathering in Battery Park and said “After it was over, there was such a good feeling of camaraderie that nobody wanted to leave. So the police asked Yoko Ono if she’d get up on stage and sing a few songs.” 
In his book Our Gang, Leonard Maltin, commenting about the short “Arbor Day,” describes the song “Trees” as sung by Alfalfa in that short as “the poem’s all-time worst rendition.”
(I went to high school with a girl who had become the lead soprano in the school’s formal choir, and later joined the New Christy Minstrels. Years later I told her I likened my singing to Alfalfa’s and she said that is self-deprecating.)
Back in my unrefined youth, I really liked Styx. My first concert! Anyway, I had several of their albums, and I always got up off my tail and lurched as quickly as I could to the turntable to skip any song with Young as lead vocals. “Miss America” is hideous.
Hah, I read this post and then heard the song again yesterday with this in mind and… you’re not wrong. Still a fun song but it’s certainly not musically competent from a vocals perspective.
This reminds me of that “I Don’t Care” song a few years back by Icona Pop. It was just several minutes of yell-chanting in lieu of singing.
Great point, and for this category I nominate Faith Hill’s version of Piece Of My Heart.
Technically not bad, but why? Why? WHY would you do that??
Janis Joplin on “Mercedez Benz.”
Admittedly I have never been a Joplin fan…though I AM a huge Classic Rock nerd. But her? I just never got it. Her voice was always raspy, weak, and often just plain off-key. But she set a new low with Benz. It is so bad it basically should be a novelty song, like those ditties that Weird Al did. Her vocals on that little, absurdly over-played p.o.s. are as harmonious as nails on a chalkboard.
Wing has the dubious honor of being the subject of an episode of South Park. I’m willing to bet that most people who know of her do so purely because of that episode.