What if I told you that you’re already dead and just don’t know it?
Horse puckey.
Gotta go, I have to figure out with those damn red door knobs don’t work.
Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.
No.
Take two martinis and post in the morning.
Holy smoke, do I have to do everything around here?
No, no one here has ever given any indication that they value what I have to say, so I don’t consider myself a “presence” here. If anyone were to announce my demise, I am quite confident it would get a resounding “who?”
But you have a good sig!
Maybe. My wife knows I post here and I share with her a lot of funnies. In fact if I say something of that nature, she’ll often ask Straight Dope?
As my computer knows my SD password (and actually I don’t I just realized) she might log on and post such info.
And in case anyone’s recording, my doc says 3-5 years on my cancer, but also says there are a lot of developments going on.
You have a better one!!
Prolly not.
If I was brought up postmortem, I’d probably be remembered as “one of those guys with the signatures.” That wouldn’t narrow it down though. . .
Tripler
Often imitated, never duplicated. 
There’s actually a line in my will for informing social media and such. SDMB is listed.
My sister Brynda would inform you, presuming she survives me. I also am a member of a tiny, tiny, tiny message board with 26 members, my family has instructions to notify them and the SDMB.
Someone else entirely is tasked with clearing my browser history.
I don’t know. I’m FB friends with a couple Dopers, but even though I share the occasional thread with my sister, she wouldn’t know how to get on and post about my tragic demise. I’m a '99’er, but not a particularly notable one.
StG
No.
My wife knows that I talk to “those people”, but she doesn’t pay enough attention to who you are to contact this board. There is a file I keep with the info that the red head might need. User names, passwords, a few other details to help her sort things out after I am gone, but the SDMB is not in that information. And I hope she would be too busy cleaning things up and moving on to care about such things.
What?! You’re on many if not most of the GD threads I read. I would definitely know you’re gone, and I’m not the most observant person. If I notice, so would others.
I hope you mean a lot of developments in treatment, not in the cancer. Hope you beat those odds.
But psychonaut, we really do know you and remember you, and will miss you if you were ever to leave for good. Please, please, please make sure that we are all notified in the event of your untimely death!
Or maybe just don’t die.
The what now? And for what it’s worth, I’m familiar with everyone who’s posted in this thread so far. Except for Serenata67–never heard of that one until just now. Weird.
My brother Sizzlefry has an account here and has posted a couple times (he participated in the GQ about tossing a coconut into a bonfire), and the only Doper who really gets me (Debon Err) would probably say something. And then her enormous and gentle heart would be crushed by the deafening apathy toward her announcement, my restive soul world grow truly wroth and would course through the servers of the 'dope like The Dead Men of Dunharrow, visiting upon cyberspace in death the rage held in check while alive. And still, none would notice. sigh
No. I live such a lone wolf life, it’s pathological.
Nope. Then again, except for my MST3K thread and the Free Game Notification thread, I’ve basically retired from the board, like, a year ago. I only bother to look for new posts once a month or so. So I’m not really sure my demise would cause me to post any less.
I promise not to be a smart ass and ask, “Who?”
You’ll have to read about it in the Darwin awards like everyone else.