Standing in the checkout at the supermarket, I was passing time as usual by mulling over the new garlic/vinegar miracle cures and Rosie O’Donnell’s secret gay life (secret?) all featured in the latest tabloids. Then I turned to the mandatory candy/impulse items display and something caught my eye.
Certs® has a new item called Powerful Mints. A cute little square package. $1.59- a little high, I thought. Then I noticed the net weight: .24 oz.! That works out to $106.00 a pound!! Nearly the cost of a bottle of Dom Perignon!
I refuse to buy this product on principle. Sure, the box might have 50 mints in it, and they might only be a little over 3¢ each. But I just can’t bring myself to patronize a company that has the nerve to charge $106.00 for a pound of sugar mixed with some peppermint oil & preservatives. Filet Mignon is only $25 a pound, for chrissakes. I’ve never bought Godiva chocolate, but I bet even that doesn’t cost more than $10 a pound.
Here in North Dakota (it may be a regional product), we have a breath mint called Nu-Breath. Basically the same as Altoids, they’re about the size of the Certs mints, come 75 to a box and cost 50 cents. Sold mainly in bars I can certify that they work wonders.
You know, I never thought of it like that. This kind of opens my eyes! I gripe at $2.50 for an 8 ounce bag of butterfingers! That means the beef jerky I occasionally buy is $14.00 a pound. (Oh, wait, considering the price of beef, seasonings and all, that’s not too outrageous.)
Those Slim Jims I buy in the can have me worried now. $1.88 for 12, which is 4 ounces. That means they’re only 7.62 a pound, which has me concerned as to just what floor sweepings go into them. Then again, if I buy them singly at the counter, they're .98 each. That comes to $47.44 a pound.
Attrayant, red_dragon, Rosebud - Godiva, on their website, is running about $34/lb for truffles, typically their priciest goods. I’m sure a little more in the mall, but still nowhere near $106. So we’re all off the hook.
Not that I would know, but sources have informed me that a pound of mexican schwag shouldn’t cost more than $600, that is assuming your getting a QP for $150 which is street price. If you want the better stuff, like hydroponically grown, there is no doubt in my mind that a pound of like say government-genetically-engineer-super-THC-content-weed would most likely cost upwards of that, but anyone who has that much money to blow on weed would be better off buying the equipment to grow it.
Not that I know about these things, but I’m in the loop. As for the expensive candy? Well if that one little mint can make me rich, powerful, and every woman’s desire, sure. But I doubt that’s what’s written on the box.
I got that price from an online wholesaler. Furthermore, Costco (a membership/warehouse type club) has it for $30.00 a pound. If you can get it for $12 a pound, I’ll pay cost plus $8 for 10 pounds.
Anybody else want to place an order as long as Dave is having a sale?
