I just wish I had been able to overcome my own lousy childhood earlier, said to fuck with it and had each of my girls eight years earlier than I did. I love them both very much.
Realistically? I regret the timing on the two oldest. I was too young myself, my marriage was lousy, my ongoing depression issues hadn’t yet been addressed. I probably shouldn’t have had them. But I don’t regret them as people. They’re amazing, smart, funny, nice folks, despite the problems they’ve had along the way, and are getting their lives on track as young adults now. I regret that I wasn’t able to be the parent to them that I’ve been for my younger kids. They deserved better than I gave.
If I had to do it all over again, not knowing the two kids I’d miss, I’d have had my four youngest. I was old enough to be a good parent by the time I had them - maybe edging toward too old for the baby, but healthy and mature enough to be a good mother.
Yes, with no qualifications.
Regards,
Shodan
My regret is my son is an only child. One or two more would have been nice.
Yes, without reservation. Biggest best thing that ever happened to me and ever will. For one thing, I overcame my own execrable upbringing and to the surprise of all, became the mother I should have had.
I have to say, I feel a lot more sympathy for people who say, I don’t have kids because I know I would be an awful parent – since I believed the same of myself – than the people who say, I don’t have kids because I wish to indulge myself in pleasures I might not have the opportunity for otherwise. I can only think of one name for the latter, sorry.
You have every right to feel negative about the latter, but I am glad such people are self-aware enough NOT to have children. Because there are plenty of people who do have children but behave as if they don’t. Their children, and thus society, suffer for it.
I have a number of reasons why I don’t want to have children. Among them is that I really like my personal freedom. I don’t understand why this should bother anyone or why someone should be ashamed for feeling this way.
This is more or less my point of view - I don’t think I’m a very good parent, and my kids have done very well despite me rather than because of me.
So, no, if I could do it again I would not have kids.
I don’t get it. What’s wrong with deciding not to have children because there are other things you’d rather do with your life?
Our son will turn 2 in a couple of weeks. He was born less than a year after we were married, and although it was a surprise, it certainly wasn’t a bad one.
If I could do it again, I would definitely not change anything. He’s brought a ton of joy into our lives, and parenthood has turned out to be more fun and less challenging than I might have expected. Having a second child, though, is something I’m not sure about. My wife would be fine with it, but I was an only child and having one kid seems perfect to me.
As a father of three, I agree. No one has a duty to have children, and every child should be loved and wanted. Those who wish to pursue other interests are more than welcome to them.
I keep getting distracted by things that are really interesting.
I never can figure out how to answer this question. I’m not trying to fight the hypothetical, it’s just that if it was going to be my same kid again, then of course I’d have her, because I would never wish she didn’t exist. But if it was going to be a different kid, then I don’t see how I’d know what parenting was really like, especially not knowing what kind of kid that would be (my kid is difficult enough, but a kid with severe disabilities or something, well, I just couldn’t. And I wouldn’t step up to the plate and surprise myself either. I know my limitations).
I’m pretty sure I’d never have been okay with not having any kids, but I have NO idea how my life would be at this point if I hadn’t. I’ve never been a childless adult before. But I’ve definitely always wanted kids ever since I was tiny. And at the same time I like/need time to myself too much and I’m too impatient for having kids to ever have really been a good idea for me. I’m impossible. What else is new?
I am a relatively new parent and likely have lots of ups and downs ahead, but I will say yes I’d do it again. Maybe a few years earlier seeing as we waited a decade. 
However, if circumstances would have been different and we would have had problems conceiving, I would not have wanted us to pursue fertility treatments or adoption and we’d have remained childless. And I’d be OK with that. I love being a parent but neither of us was ever in love with the idea of being one or willing to go to the ends of the earth to be one. We definitely enjoyed our childless life and would have been fine keeping it.
What makes you think the latter group needs, wants, or cares about your sympathy? You’re fooling yourself if you believe there is any less selfishness in the warm fuzzy pleasures that come with being a parent.
Exactly my answer.
Parenthood has been absolutely wonderful for me, but her father is an utter misery and a financial drain like no other. If I had it to do again I’d have a child earlier, and through a sperm bank.
My wife and I don’t have kids, mostly because we wish to indulge ourselves in pleasures we might not have the opportunity for otherwise.
More seriously, I am quite happy to be the Cool Uncle to my nieces, nephew and friends’ children. With so many people more motivated than me to be parents, it made sense to let them get on with it, and to find other ways to spend my life. Which I am contentedly doing.
Can I keep the last two and return the first one?
Nothing, on the face of it. There are way too many children as it is, and a parent who doesn’t want to be one is the curse of the world. But to me, not having kids because you want to do the world a favor and not having kids because you want to do yourself a favor are somehow a lot different from each other. Motive matters.
There are a lot of pleasures that come with being a parent, but they are not a given – and the responsibilities and sacrifices are. I never thought I would have children, because I didn’t want to curse my children with horrible parenting the way I was cursed. I healed enough to take the risk, and that risk paid off for me. But there certainly was no guarantee it would.
Two kids, So Glad I did. It might just be the one lottery that I did hit.
I think they are handsome as hell, their report cards say they are smart, and when I get to see them, I Know they are hysterically funny.
When I dropped my youngest off at school before, he hugged me and told me to “…have a wonderful, wonderful day at work, Daddy!” 
They don’t make a dead-leather wallet stuffed with enough cash to match that.