My brother posted this on Facebook earlier - The idea would be to write a literary passage of moderate length while trying to imitate Faulkner in terms of tone and style. Anyone who participates would be allowed to vote for the winner.
Here is my entry. Very political, if you believe Biden is a socialist and that the Earth is 6000 years old, don’t read.
Boogaloo Boys diary entry, 12/29/2000
Goddamn country heading straight toward socialism, these Democrats stealing the election from God’s chosen one and putting socialist Biden in the White House and you can see he is one as he was proud back in the day of taking the Amtrak into work every day instead of driving an American-made car and no one is going to force me to ride a socialist train and these socialists are imposing their tyranny of making me wear a fucking mask, I got a goddamn God-given right to breathe the free air our founders guaranteed us don’t matter if the oil and coal companies that put food on my Christian table have polluted that air it is free air just like the free air I put in my made in American-made tires on American-made car down at my local gas station, and I put gas in the car that is provided by the great Exxon and who cares if this billion dollar company gets millions in tax subsidies from the guvment, that is why the goddamn guvment exists, to make sure that their trickle-down dimes end up in the pocket of my American-made jeans and I am so sick of these commies telling me that we all have to look after each other, in this fucking free country you look out for yourself and your family and if you can’t make it on your own you don’t take no charity, you live in poverty until the day you die hell even the Godless commie believers in evolution say it’s the survival of the fittest and if you ain’t fit your kind should die out but my kind ain’t dying out and we are free Americans and we will live free or die, and all these weak people living on their Social Security checks, a goddamn socialist program if there ever was one, it’s in the fucking name, and who cares if the US Postal service is a guvment program that works very well as it did in the building of the interstate highway system where I drive my Ameircan-made car and the Grand Cooley Dam and the Hoover Dam and all the other goddamn dams that provide electricity to my brothers out west fighting guvment tyranny, and the guvment run Apollo program that put men on the moon, they got lucky and who cares if the majority of elderly Americans lived in poverty until we had Social Security and who cares if they didn’t have any health care until they had Medicaid, in my day we didn’t need no doctors and their high-falutin’ ways based on science, that fucking science that tells us that we all came from apes and if that is so why the fuck are there still apes walking around and I don’t give a fuck that I have to deny all of modern science and insist on a literal reading of a dozen verses in the Bible instead of saying they are just a parable or metaphor, God created this world six thousand years ago and he did not create it so socialists could ruin this Christian country that God himself built, it’s in the Pledge of Allegiance and so what if that was only added in the 50’s because of the Red Scare they were goddamn right to be scared of the Reds as we should be now with the fucking senile President-elected fradulently that everyone knows is being run by Obama and Hillary and AOC and Bernie and it don’t make no difference to me that the chances of any Progressive laws being passed are less than zero because it would require that every single Democrat in the Senate to vote for it plus 10 Republicans to overcome a filibuster which is guaranted because in United We Fall, Divided We Stand Kentucky we have Moscow Mitch defending our God-given freedoms and his nickname is OK with me because the Ruskies are no longer Red, and we ain’t either and we ain’t gonna be until you take the guns from our cold dead hands.