WTF?! 1 student at my school dead, two siblings of students dead

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

In less than a week. And all are separate families.

A week ago Tuesday, one of my students’ older brothers (19) was fleeing police. He took out a gun–never a smart thing–and was shot in the chest and killed. His family is trying to say he was “just trying to throw the gun away,” but again…not a smart thing. Other than missing a day for his funeral, the little girl (5th grade, 10) never said a word. I don’t get the impression she knew him much at all, and haven’t said anything to her…though I waiver back and forth as to whether I should.

Then Sunday. Not a good day for our school.

A fourth grader, in one of my buddies’ classrooms, had left for a family trip to Mexico. She was going to be out for 2 weeks and was worried she wouldn’t get back into Mr. Smith’s class (when they’re gone that long, they’re dropped from enrollement); he assured her that as the classes weren’t full, it shouldn’t be a problem coming back to him…so she was comforted and felt okay going.

On the drive, the mother lost control of their high-profile SUV in the high winds and the car rolled. Despite wearing a seatbelt, the little girl–and all of the family–was ejected. She was killed instantly. The mother has a dislocated shoulder, and the father had about 35 staples on his head…but that’s it. The two little ones–about 1 and 2, I think–were kept safe in their car seats. There’s no article in our local paper about it yet, perhaps because it happened in Mexico. The principal was going to send home a memo to alert families (so they can understand the umpteen questions their kids will have), but a bizarre transformer outtage killed our power–and the copiers–all morning. Weird.

Mr. Smith told me her desk is so sad…it’s covered with flowers and little rememberances. Some of the students don’t quite get it…they’re writing “Get well soon.” :frowning: They spent the day with the counselor yesterday.

Also on Sunday, a little three year old on a scooter was hit by a car as he left the driveway. He was in critical condition then later that evening was pronounced dead. He is the younger brother of one of our kindergarteners…our poor administration was dealing with two families and two classrooms on one day (Plus, as the 4th grader teamed, all the other 4th grade classes were seen by the counselor). A link to the news article (might be gone in a day or two, I don’t know): http://www.sgvtribune.com/Stories/0,1413,205%7E12220%7E1108514,00.html

I’ve been at the school 5 years, and in all those 5 years, we’ve had one parent and one sibling die. In 5 years. We’ve matched, and passed, that in less than a week.

This all just fucking sucks.

:frowning:

2

I graduated high school with about 150 people. Within two years, two of my classmates had died in wierd ways, the first in an apartment fire (she was the only death) and the second had a really bad shrooms trip and froze to death while running around in the snow naked.

Luckily, it’s been about 7 years now since I graduated, and no further deaths that I’m aware of. But I’m really sorry, Ruffian. When kids that little go, there’s no good way to explain it away.

3

The same thing happened to me during the last few years I was in high school. The school had pretty much a zero mortality rate for well over 10 years and then in the 3 years I was there 1 person committed suicide and 4 others were killed. One in an avalanche, one by drunk driver, one drunk driving and one involved in a hit-and-run.

It was pretty bad - grief counsellors in the school every year.

I feel for you and yours. That is something no one should have to live through. That the children were so young makes it that much worse.

:frowning:

-n

4

A good friend of mine died when we were ten. Next year a kid’s parent dies. Then the next two years at least two parents died that I know of. And for a while there probably was something that I don’t remember. Earlier this school year there was a car crash and one or two students died - and another one brain damaged - (but not in my graduating class). November I’m thinkin a student dies in a car crash. December I was in the Assitant Principle’s Office (fun times there) and whilst I was waiting I overheard a discussion between the secretary and a girl who missed school because of her brother’s funeral. There’s probably more but I’m in a class of at least twelve hundred. So I don’t always get the news.

5

I’m sorry to hear that, Ruffian. Two accidents and, well, an unfortunate circumstance. I hope the youngsters deal with it OK; my experience has been that the very young often seem* to handle it better than the 12-18 crowd.

I’m certainly no expert. It does suck.
*emphasis

6

At the school where I went last year, for several years running at least one girl would commit suicide each year. There haven’t been any recently, but I would put the blame at least partially on the school. The counselors there are quite frankly worthless, the school totally ignores the huge drug and alcohol problems, and the social dynamics are such that if you don’t fit in, you will be miserable. I know, because I didn’t…:frowning:

But I left. And I am so happy that I did.

7

Ruffian, I am so sorry. It must be so hard for you all. There are no words.

Take care and I hope this is the end of the deaths.

8

I went to a tiny High School - had 350 pupils from school ages 11 to 18 - and in the 7 years that I was there, 5 teachers died.

One of them was my Art teacher for my first year there. She had JUST graduated from Teacher’s College, and had been at our school, her first, for two months. She was coaching (playing) Netball after class and suddenly had a brain aneurysm and died instantly. She was about 26 years old.

We also had maybe 4 pupils die during that time, but I only knew one of them, the rest were strangers to me.

It’s a surreal thing, death.

9

The “get well soon” thing broke my heart, Ruffian :frowning:

When I was in high school at least one person died every year. One guy died if alcohol poisoning, a good friend of mine drowned, an aquaintance and her friend were drunk driving and plummeted off the bank of a wash and burned to death in the car. Another friend of mine dropped dead of a heart attack after jogging to work in August (never a smart thing in 110+ degree heat) and probably the saddest of all: a Vietnamese girl, college age, I think, had been living here and saving up money to bring her sister to America. She finally did, and her sister had been here for one week (and had started going to my school) when she was killed by a drunk driver while standing on the side of the road :’(

10

I did my junior year of college abroad through the University of California’s Education Abroad Program. Although we went to school with students from all over the US and Canada, us UC students had out own advisors, and we’d done a summer program together, separate from the rest of the students in the year long program. There were only about 50 of us, so we got to know each other pretty well. (Plus, a lot of us knew other participants from our home universities, high schools, and even summer camps.) This was the 1998-1999 school year, and our class of 50 has already seen two deaths and one severe mental breakdown. One guy died from leukemia that had previously been in remission, and one girl was killed in a terrorist bombing last August. Also, another guy in the group was sent home in the middle of the year with a case of Jerusalem Syndrome.

11

In Elementary School, a classmate died of alcohol poisoning during a party. It was especially hard for his best friend at school. Every year the two of them did a dance routine, but that year the friend had to do it alone :frowning:

In Middle school, a classmate died in a car accident on the way back from disneyland. This hit a little closer to home for me; I knew the guy and was kind of friends with him. We used to play Dungeons and Dragons with a few other classmates over at his house sometimes.

12

David, the guy who drowned, was the hardest, I think.

First of all, I found out about it when I was locked up in a state home and one of the staff was reading us headlines from the newspaper. Not a fun way to find out. My mom refused to give permission for me to be released to go to his funeral. She didn’t want me to “see my friends” because I was being punished.

The newspaper article said that he and a friend had been hiking, and then they went swimming in a lake. Apparently he was exhausted and slipped under the water. His friend tried to grab him, but felt him slip past his feet. He dove under and searched for him but couldn’t find him. I think they found his body the next day :frowning:

13

My high school was big enough that it averages about a death per year. Usually this is the result of a car accident, but not always.

We had a senior die in a fire at a Santa Claus suit factory one year. He was a volunteer fireman and responded when the call came. The fire turned out to be arson.

When I was a sixth-grader, a high school student actually died on the football field. It turned out he had an undiagnosed enlarged heart.

A good friend of mine is a mid-80s graduate of Columbine High School, which didn’t have a high death rate until you-know-what happened.

14

One guy from my after school day care died when I was 7. He drowned while I was on vacation in South Dakota. I didn’t get to see his funeral, but his sister (cousin maybe) used to beat up on me afterwards. He was a nice guy. He taught me how to tell the difference between the Sears Tower and the John Hancock building. :(.

15

For some reason, I think it’s incredibly sad that the little girl didn’t know her brother much at all. I wish more families were close to each other.

A story that my wife (a second-grade school teacher) told me from last year: She has a new pupil in her class, so goes to get the little girl from the office to bring her in. When she brings her in, one of the little boys already in my wife’s class says “Hey, I didn’t know you were going to be in my class!” It turns out that they were brother and sister! And have the same age (only a few months apart!) And at the age of 7 years old, they’re so out of touch that the brother is surprised when the (half-)sister shows up in the same class! :frowning:

16

Cometerthinkof it, I have a death school. A few years back there were 3 suicides and more than a couple car accidents.

17

goodness ruffian. i’m so sorry. i’m sure this is one thing they didn’t go over in “teaching 101.”

i know you will do what needs to be done, and be a comfort for your students. i hope y’all will get through the remainder of the school year without further tragedies.

18

I know how this goes. I went to a small school, about 50 students per grade. I’m not going to list all the friends and teachers I lost from jr. high through high school. The list would be way to long, and I’d be a wreck for three days. Let’s just say I buried way too many friends before I even finished school.

The worst though was telling my younger sister that her best friend in elementary school was dead less than a year after they graduated.

I know this is said ad nauseum, but please don’t drink and drive. If it weren’t for that, most of the people I’m thinking about right now would still be alive.

19

Amen to that. Within three weeks while in high school, my best friend of 8 years died in a car wreck, a very close friend died for no explicable reason, and another friend died in a car wreck. Both car wrecks were caused by drunk drivers. It was a very sad three weeks for me.

20

Aye, tragedies definitely strike all schools. My high school, for example, has suffered in the past two decades:

-At least two students executed in an armed robbery of a local bowling alley they were employed at. Their girlfriends were also murdered, but I don’t know if they went to my school.

-This year, two students who had graduated last year from my school perished in auto accidents: one was killed when a drunk driver struck his truck, the other killed when a cop car involved in a chase struck his car. The cop was going over 80mph and didn’t have his headlights on, for some peculiar reason.

-Last year, a student in my grade also died in a car wreck.

-This year, a student from my high school succumbed to brain cancer, after suffering it for three years.

-A student in the '80s died when his liver failed due to the acne medicine he was on.

-My school had a school shooting.

-At least two former students of my school in the last decade have become murderers.

-One former student went on a shooting spree a year after graduation, badly wounding a local middle school student before surrendering to the police.

-A student a few years ago drowned trying to save his little brother, who subsequently survived.

So, yeah, I understand the trauma upon the community that you’re witnessing. My school is certainly no stranger.