The good news is that my boobies appear to be tumor-free. The bad news is that they’ve been squeezed so damn hard that:
a) I swear they’re longer now, and
b) any tumor even thinking of taking up residence in one of The Girls was probably squeezed out and squirted right on into my lungs from the force of that goddamn machine!
I would honestly rather have a pap smear a week than do that again! I know, I know… an ounce of prevention and all that…
Studies have found that running over breasts with trucks is ineffective in detecting breast cancer.
Plus, there’s no CPT code for it, so reimbursement is poor.
On the bright side, recent advances in computer assisted detection, and calculated risk studies, have reduced the recommended frequency of mammography exams for many women.
Well, I’ve been enduring these things for 9 years, plus the baseline done when I was 35. And let me assure you, it doesn’t get any less uncomfortable. I don’t know if it’s worse to have too much or too little, but having big 'uns means they hafta smoosh 'em with a lot of pressure to make the cross section as thin as possible.
But I go every year, and I shall continue to go. And I shall continue to hope that someone develops a device that can detect tumors without the smooshing. A MammoCone[sup]TM[/sup] - that’s what we need! Slip it on like a bra. Take an image. No muss, no fuss, no smoosh. Perhaps I shall invent it.
Thanks for the sympathy. Fortunately for you, I think the worst you fellas have to endure is the application of some cool jelly and a nice little massage with an ultrasound wand.
In the Radiologic Technology program I’m in, only the females pull rotations in mammography. Kinda unfair when you think about all of the invasive genitorectal procedures we do on both men and women. Oh, well.
I’m curious, though. Maybe someday I’ll wander over to Mammo and have them squish my hand just to see how much pressure there is.
(I understand that booblets are more “sensitive” than my hand, but I just want to get an idea.)
I had my first mammogram on Wednesday and was surprised that it didn’t hurt much. It was a bit uncomfortable, but that was it. And as soon as the pic was done and the machine release, the pain was over.
“I am now at the age where I have to have mammograms. Now for you young girls, basically what that is, is they take your bosom, SLAM IT IN A CAR DOOR, and take a PICTURE of it!”
-Vickie Shaw
